DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Gramh]

Good job Phil, you did as predicted and are in dire straits yet again financially and are doing a marathon that is disjointed with the reality that you have a small fanbase and if they aren't hitting your $150 tips goal or membership goals already that more money isn't going to appear out of thin air but somehow undoubtedly the poor retards that have been supporting you will put their rent checks on hold to make sure you make enough to pay your Scop...mortgage bill and you will go back to the weird dichotomy of saying how much you need tips because your Youtube revenue is so small so that people don't increase your Youtube revenue so you can beg for more tips till your next marathon when all of the previous fails. A lesser man would give up and find a source of more consistent payment but you're the smartest uber chad and are going to continue to do the same predictable low effort work you've become known for.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

Phil shouting at people for suggesting he visits the park with his wife while he burns his mouth on hamburger helper he cooked for an hour. Bro you hate your life, just come clean and start streaming WWE Champions. Stahp this.

Edit: still reading through the thread. Phil learning what Indian food is and then explaining it to his chat is GOLDEN. Wow thanks man they put curry on rice? Crazy. Can't wait until he tries Chinese food for the first time. We'll get a two hour prestream "so with original authentic Chinese food you put soy sauce on it"

Edit edit: Him going to the windows because he heard fireworks sounds on July 4th

 

[Squidfucker]

Darksydephil? Oh that guy is definitely the weird guy of the community, probably doesn't get out much so he's probably only outside when he absolutely needs to be.
Like the guy gets to play at home all the live-long day while everybody works, is shit at the games he plays, blames everyone but himself and then he gets rewarded for not being willing to change up his strategy and blaming the creators.
Like look at any of 'This Is How You Don't Play Dark Souls' because my god, he bitches and moans so much that it genuinely frustrated me to watch.
Then he has a group of fans that reward him despite the fact that he has done nothing to earn it.

 

[gh0stzero]

I like how he flipped the no mentioning money script and is doubling down on the begging. Sounds like a good 4th and always remember Dave is "immortal".

Do Americans get money as gifts for 4th July?

Phils tried getting his fans to donate their christmas gift money to him before maybe he's hoping to get some wheelchair bux for 4th July.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

probably doesn't get out much

Are you new? Phil is convinced if the sun touches him he'll die of heatstroke. He'll go outside though if it means blowing paypiggy money on soggy pasta at some shithole restaurant he's convined is "authentic italian". Just don't ask him to go to the beach or have a picnic because those things that people have been doing for thousands of years is retarrrr i didn't say that.

 

[Mature Adult]

I'm gonna need a timeline of all the tips goals and fundraisers to "pay bills".

4/21 - $400/day, 2x the amount due to twitch partner loss
5/14 - Fundraiser to pay bills because of no Twitch payment( Twitch paid him)
6/21 - Lowered it to $200/day after Youtube payment arrived
7/1 - Raised to $300/day
??/?? - Fundraiser to pay bills

 

[Squidfucker]

Are you new? Phil is convinced if the sun touches him he'll die of heatstroke. He'll go outside though if it means blowing paypiggy money on soggy pasta at some shithole restaurant he's convined is "authentic italian". Just don't ask him to go to the beach or have a picnic because those things that people have been doing for thousands of years is retarrrr i didn't say that.

Oh my god it really does get worse doesn't it?
He really, really needs to go outside and get a life, playing video games all day, everyday can't be good for you.
Like the fact that he basically only goes outside if he has some random guy's money it's fucking upsetting, why is he rewarded for this crap?

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

why is he rewarded for this crap?

Unironically? Irony.

 

[Balr0g]

I'm gonna need a timeline of all the tips goals and fundraisers to "pay bills".

4/21 - $400/day, 2x the amount due to twitch partner loss
5/14 - Fundraiser to pay bills because of no Twitch payment( Twitch paid him)
6/21 - Lowered it to $200/day after Youtube payment arrived
7/1 - Raised to $300/day
??/?? - Fundraiser to pay bills

The new cycle of DSP's life: begging and begging extraordinaire. I assume he will do a begathon each second month. Or he will wait for the 6 month cooldown from Twitch (that should be the 22nd October) and crawl back into the Affiliate program and then retcon he ever said he would never go back unless they publicly apologize to him. Twitch only crawls before Thots with nice tits not for manbabies with man tits Phil. We all know you will go back to Twtich before the year is over

 

[breezy style]

My god.... he's lining up ANOTHER BEGATHON ALREADY!?!? This guy somehow manages to outdo himself constantly; I wouldn't be surprised if by 2022, the tips goal is $300 (at $200 he dabs 10 times & at $300 he grabs Jasper for 5 seconds of screentime). Feel free to steal this ingenious reward system too Phil.

I know it's mentioned in the site's rules/tips here, but sometimes it's hard not to get really pissed off over his antics & selfish attitude. As in, mad enough that I wouldn't mind OI(n)C, flipping his shit & paying the pig a visit to beat his ass when he leaves the barn w/ the horse.

On the other hand, getting overly annoyed is pointless since regardless of how much money the gets... we all know it's being blown asap. We also know he's miserable & completely boned when his streaming 'career' ends, since he's too stupid, lazy, & out-of-shape to ever hold a normal job.... & even if Khet is still around then, she apparently can't handle full-time work either for w/e reason. It makes me wonder if perhaps she also has a gacha-type addiction when she's not on Skyrim (I think that was her fav game?)... & phil is desperately funding it in order to keep her happy & around still.

 

[Radical Goodspeed]

Do Americans get money as gifts for 4th July?

Phils tried getting his fans to donate their christmas gift money to him before maybe he's hoping to get some wheelchair bux for 4th July.

No generally, not (The 4th of July and Thanksgiving are giant meal holidays, not traditionally gift-giving). But it is the start of the month, and a holiday weekend, which means there's a lot of tard-bux and paychecks should have come in and people should have just enough downtime to remember Phil is starving like a common office worker!

I do kind of wonder how true the idea of Phil bilking literal kids is anymore? I don't think there were that many overall during Twitch (and its possibl they were adults taking the piss out of Phil's greed), and we know most of the current whales are more degenerate losers than dumb kids.

Phil wishes he still had the gravitational pull to rip off kids of thier Christmas money. By Christmas he'll be lucky to be streaming to half a dozen people at this rate, the other 6 people with nowhere to go or no one else to talk to.

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

The new cycle of DSP's life: begging and begging extraordinaire. I assume he will do a begathon each second month. Or he will wait for the 6 month cooldown from Twitch (that should be the 22nd October) and crawl back into the Affiliate program and then retcon he ever said he would never go back unless they publicly apologize to him. Twitch only crawls before Thots with nice tits not for manbabies with man tits Phil. We all know you will go back to Twtich before the year is over

We know that he likes to make hugely false statements about what he thinks about all these mega corporations (Twitch and Youtube) and big name personas (Ninja, the Paul brothers, Pewdiepie) and that there is so much evidence out there on detractor videos, his own clips on his channel, and in his own tweets, it makes it incredibly apparent that talking about them in such a pahsative light for years on end, he will immediately denounce them as utter scum who failed to bend to his demands and should get down on their knees and apahligise to him, with a sorry letter and some bonus treats to boot.

He will attempt to apply again, because the bahttom line is, he is incredibly envious of what he's lost from what he was making it on Twitch, and even though his income is not doing too terribly at all, he absolutely feels that he deserves what was rightfully his, because in his eyes, he didn't do anything wrong on Twitch in the first place! That money is his and he wants the money!

Maybe he should put off his gunner glasses off permanently this time instead of making them a generous reward for himself, since he's incapable of seeing his own selfish misdoings at not fault but his own.

 

[Adebisi]

I know it's mentioned in the site's rules/tips here, but sometimes it's hard not to get really pissed off over his antics & selfish attitude.

I usually just watch pig and laugh at pig but its hard sometimes not to get upset at his greed. Jaxxraxxor is a moron but when he said he would not be able to tip because he was saving for a car I was rooting for him to wake up. A few weeks later and I have to watch him drop $25 here and there and this last Street Fighter stream he dropped $25 at first then got baited by a begment and gave $100. This dude is putting DSP in front of his need for a fucken car some people man.

I just had to let it go and realize some people will never free themselves from the event horizon of the pig's black hole of finances.

 

[bajagoogoo]

I hate DSP so much. I know it's stupid, but he's a constant reminder that terrible people exist and get rewarded for being terrible and it's very depressing.

No need to hate Phil or anyone like him. They have enough hatred and self loathing for themselves and the destroyed career they still depend on.

Phil should be making around 200-300k/year on YouTube alone. At this point in his career, his combined YouTube/streaming income should be about 400k+/year. He should be considering retirement by now

Instead, Phil is dependant on streaming because his YouTube career is incapable of supporting him. This is largely due to his unique ability to destroy anything positive that graces his life.

And that's just the business side.

His financial side is one horrible decision after the next. His social life is non-existent. His unhealthy lifestyle is taking it's toll on his appearance.

He's lost all semblance of respect in the YouTube/FGC and streaming community. His most well known shout out are through WatchMojo and Keemstar when he jerked off on stream.

If Phil could snap his fingers and go back to 2010, he absolutely would.

 

[The Black Prince]

So hes just gonna do a marathon every month? He's a moron but he can't be stupid enough to think he has any chance of being successful long term. The channel isn't going to grow. He does nothing to try and grow it. Most youtube people who live stream also create videos (which arent just lazy cut up versions of a stream) and gain an audience that way.

At this point I really think hes just waiting to try and get Affiliate on twitch back so he can be gifted subs and get troll cheers. Only thing that makes sense.

 

[Anya15]

On what fucking planet is an hour too long to cook something Philip? The only thing that takes 10 minutes to “cook” is either shit you put in the microwave or take out.

 

[Paladin Derich]

DSP hearing some fireworks outside, he goes to the window to check what it is. Two times now. Paranoid coward pussy bitch.

For fucks sake why would anyone want to watch this fat retard LALALALA his way through Chrono Trigger?

I'd love to see phil on trial in chrono trigger court irl

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

Can we please go through this incredible hamburger helper rant?
>my wife said "oh let me do something quick
>because i have to work today
>so here's something you can make at home
Bro it's a mom telling her lil baby you gona have to be satisfied with dino nuggies, mommy has to go and make real money with her big girl job.

>it says it's quick, by the way hamburger helper is NAHT quick, i'll tell you in a moment
Once more Phil is bamboozled by writing on packets. 2 minute cup noodle? Uh it took me 15 minutes to film this you dumb fuck. Wait a second, X-treme barbecue chips? This taste like the same barbecue chips I've been eating that weren't X-treme!

>now she said her favorite is the italian shell. now i've never had the italian shell. when my mommy made hamburger helper she made stroganoff and cheeseburger
No comment necessary.

The only times I've ever eaten hamburger helper is when I'm blackout drunk and even then I remember it doesn't take an hour. Hamburger helper is easymac but meat. Phil fucked up easymac.

>I burned my mouth. My tongue's completely burned. It took me 20 minutes to eat it and it was still hot. When I was eating the last piece it was still hot
This hungry hungry hippo burned his mouth and went OW and then kept shovelling frozen bullshit into his funnel and burning himself because mm tasty plastic food.

>As I'm eating it i realize it's one of the most disgusting things I've ever eaten in my life
Heh

>they call it Italian, there's no tomato, there's no oregano
This shows how easy it is to blow Phil's mind with an authentic italian x. Put tomato paste from a can and sprinkle some oregano on that nigger, he's convinced it's made by Tony Soprano.

>as I was eating this I was like "I don't want to eat this but it's all I have. But I forced it down."
Remember to donate. Phil is starving because his wife made him burn Hamburger Helper.

>What I'm hoping is that my wife agrees with me and not that she actually likes that
I've never cared what my gfs ate. This is weird to me and may be something about his relationship. Very infantile. Very "I hope mommy doesn't cook me this" vibe.

This entire rant about what amounts to a microwaveable meal was combined with heavy rocking and wild bug eyes. I hope more people ask Phil about random childish things like this. Maybe next time we can get his take on instant coffee or mouthwash.

 

[Pargon]

(Yet another) BEGATHON INCOMING!
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I thought he was a variety streamer. I thought more than one game of the same type would keep attendance and donations low.

Whatever, can’t wait to watch him sleepwalk his way through 60% of Chrono Trigger since every month he brings up wanting to replay it. I hope Dalton’s Gahlems bend him over and ruin his anus because there’s no way his gin-riddled brain remembers how to fight them.

 

[Rockerverb]

As useless as Phil is at everything he does, part of me thinks he purposely made that HH as bad as possible just so he can say "See? I can't be trusted to make my own food. Nuh huh". He's obviously not happy with Kat's cooking lately so maybe he's using tried and true pignosis on her so she'll step it up since he doesn't have any balls to actually confront her about the declining meal quality. Maybe I'm looking into it too much, but something seems off about the whole HH rant. Where did the wife that loves to cook so much go?