There's a thing in the disability "community" called "internalised ableism" which kinda pisses me off. It's a way to basically guilt people into thinking they're shitty for wanting to not be disabled. If an autistic person doesn't like the idea of just acting autistic, like they want to mask and try to appear completely neurotypical, they are said to have internalised ableism because they should accept their differences and not change themselves to suit society's expectations.
What pisses me off about this is that how you act, or how you see your condition as a whole is completely your experience. If you wish you could cure your condition, there's nothing wrong with that, but the online communities have pushed this narrative now that if you want to be "normal" then it's just that society has conditioned you to feel that way and you need to address your own internalised hatred instead. I've worked with special needs kids who were severely enough effected by their conditions to need to go to special school, but not so much that they had no awareness of how they were different to others. Some of them felt really embarrassed by the struggles they had socially, for example. Not being able to always follow a conversation because they couldn't get jokes or understand certain cues really bothered them, and no amount of societal acceptance will change the fact that they have those struggles. Yes, people can adapt situations to try and make sure others can fit in, but the fact is that the conditions are a thing because someone has difficulties that others not effected by said conditions don't have difficulties with. Most people day to day are not gonna be thinking about how hard it might be for someone with a (neurological) condition to interact/take part in something- most people would struggle to even understand what it would feel like to experience the issues an autistic person has, because social cues and things like that don't have an explanation. You just know what they are.
I'm not autistic, but have other health issues in my life and I can say for 1000% sure if someone offered me a magic wand that would cure me of everything and I could have a normal healthy life, I would take it in a heartbeat. Even if it would just cure one out of the few things wrong. That's not because society has told me it's bad to be sick, it's because I want to live a life that feels good for me. Yes, discrimination against disabled people is a real issue, I've experienced it myself, but I wouldn't want a cure just to not experience it ever again- I want a cure so I can feel happy and that's all that matters. Someone else in the same position as me might say no- and that's fine as well. It's your life to live. But don't tell others that they shouldn't feel a certain way about their own personal experiences.
I completely, 100% agree with all of this.
For me, I've got... a few screws loose. It doesn't really bother me in the sense that I'm ashamed to have my quirks, but it does get quite annoying sometimes. Perhaps somewhat severely contrary to a lot of opinions here, I don't think autism etc. is *always* a bad thing. Like any spectrum stuff, it affects everyone differently. Sometimes severely, sometimes not, sometimes even not really at all. I think there's also something to be said for autism etc. being a part of who you are as a person.
True, it may be hard to ignore how, shall we say, intertwined this forum is with things like autism, but it seems to me that for every weirdo/sick fuck/whatever you may see with content here, there's gotta be so many more half-arsed normal folks who have a few quirks about them, but manage to live functional, self-sufficient lives, or at least if they *do* require help, it's a genuine need, and I'll go out on a limb to say that most people who do need help, probably wish and hope that they don't, ditto going to the effort of actually getting better, so maybe they can walk on their own two feet one day. That shit I love to see.
Moving on, though, while I understand how one can see autism etc. as a positive in their lives, as a part of their character, or any disability, really, what I don't understand, is having it like a badge of honor, Disabilities can absolutely severely affect anyone, and absolutely if someone can come to terms or be accepting of it in some way, that's great, however I feel there's a bit of a divide between this, and...
this. I can't quite think of how to explain it, but I think most would know where I'm coming from. Where I'm coming from is for those people who shove their disabilities in everyone else's face, or just base their whole goddamn life around it.
I think [whatever name today] is a good case of this. If they're not begging for shinies, they're flaunting their disabilities for, literally, everything it's worth. I hope I'm not the only one here who feels there's a big difference between being content or proud of yourself in the sense of living your life to the best of your abilities, despite your disabilities, and using your disabilities for pity points, or some other form of exploitation for profit. I feel like these two things are quite different, but who knows, that could just be me.
In any case, I admire being proud of yourself for who you are as a person, and for living your best life despite whatever may come up against you. But fuck me do I *hate* when people use their disabilities as bargaining chips for whatever the fuck they want to use it for.
P.S. I think what I'm getting at, in a nutshell, is that two people can have the same disability, even the same severity, but while one asks what they *can* do, the other focuses on what they *can't* (or "can't") do. That's kinda the idea I'm trying to convey.
P.P.S. Have vaguely caught up, and in a way I'm kinda glad I saw that mattress, because that really is making my housework kick into high gear. I felt nauseous looking at that, my god.