Choose Your Fate

[Μusk]

• You said something nasty on the internet! The government severely restricts your access to the internet. You can only go online at your local library/school, and are barred from ALL social media, imageboards, the farms, and communication websites. You are allowed a maximum of 6 hours online. Your local police department will watch your activity in real time. This order is effective for the next 3 years.
• Get fucked shitlord. Twitter troons have identified you as a target and doxed your information. Cancelled! You've been fired as a result/unenrolled from school, and have a bleak chance of ever recovering in the future with your history online and your name in the news. A large portion of your family and friends have disowned you. You will very likely become a hopeless NEET, or descend further into the darkness if already.
• Get the buckets. A random sperg on the farms makes a thread about you, and its a success! You are now one of the most prolific cows on the farms and all of your actions and lifestyle will be documented, forever, to be milked indefinitely for laughs. There is no escape. Your personality has been changed to be arrogant, and you won't DFE and "let the kiwis succeed" as a result.
• The new working class. Anarchist rebellions in your area have absorbed your city, and you've been forced to become to a worker. You've been assigned the job of farmer, and everyday you will work 10-12 hours tending to newly created fields, under the supervision of an supervisor, with death threatened for insubordination. Your place of living has been confiscated, and now houses 3 different families. Ironically, food is scarce, and you find yourself becoming more sickly, both physically and mentally. It will be many months before your government gets off their ass and drives away the rebellion. Death is a real possibility.

 

[Monika H.]

I chose 2.
Troons have no power in my country and if you tried talking about "Social Justice" or "Canceling", people would just laugh at you.

 

[Curt Sibling]

Option five - Wait for the upcoming nuclear war to cleanse the Earth of all diseased filth and human insanity.

 

[I Love Beef]

Option six: Watch as troons and SJWs destroy the free market, and unwittingly reveal ties with communist authoritarian sentiment and conspiracies. This results in massive public backlash as most people cannot relate with them on a basic human level, and destroys the credibility of their own subculture in many ways. As they go monetarily bankrupt, they slowly off themselves in a melange of drugs, self pity, and suicide by cop.

 

[Dutch Courage]

I would choose #3. A farmer's bark is often worse than his or her bite, and some of them are quite nice. Even the mean ones are at least kinda witty. And for all the cows' whining and mooing, the other fates are worse.

That said, #4 looks just a tad less unlikely with each passing day.

 

[Shadfan666xxx000]

I dont lose anything with option 3 so I'll choose that.

 

[Yellow Yam Scam]

One would be a welcome respite.

 

[Stilgar of Troon]

Option 1. Keep your head down and your nose clean for 3 years and use that time to learn how you were caught and identified. When your time's up, don't make the same mistakes.

 

[alreadyhome]

KiwiFarms is serious business

 

[alreadyhome]

I would choose #3. A farmer's bark is often worse than his or her bite, and some of them are quite nice. Even the mean ones are at least kinda witty. And for all the cows' whining and mooing, the other fates are worse.

That said, #4 looks just a tad less unlikely with each passing day.

 

[alreadyhome]

"Don't fall afoul of the wrong people" is good advice, when it's not cowardly. @Muskrat

 

[Just A Butt]

Apologize for triple posting you absolute faggot.

E: option 3. Some cows leverage their infamy into a steady paycheck.

 

[Pee Cola]

Option 1. Taking forced leave from the internet probably isn't such a bad thing.

 

[Hellbound Hellhound]

Option 2. If society and everyone I knew ever fell to the behest of the Twittersphere, then I'd embrace being cancelled.

 

[Whatevermancer]

Option 1, if I can still access Github and Stack Overflow.
Otherwise, option 2.

 

[Alrakkan]

New working class is peak Weimar, gamer rebellion begins. #3's good too.

 

[alreadyhome]

Apologize for triple posting you absolute faggot.

E: option 3. Some cows leverage their infamy into a steady paycheck.

Sorry for triple posting @Just A Butt

 

[Fireman Sam]

Honestly I'd rather become the most talked about cow on kiwifarms while having an arrogant personality as it would consistently feed into my attention craving shit and hopefully my antics would be a source of laughter for many here!!