Chris Chan vs. Patrick Tomlinson

Better LOLcow?

  • Christine Weston Chandler aka Ian Brandon Anderson

    Votes: 7 43.8%
  • Patrick Samuel Tomlinson aka Fatrick the Pig

    Votes: 9 56.3%

  • Total voters
    16

BlaireWhitesBottom2

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 15, 2023
We had a bit of disdcussion on the fatrick thread and I figured I would put this up to a vote, who do you think is a better lolcow? IMO I enjoy fatrick much much more than Chris. "enjoy prison stalker" has become part of my everyday phrases.
 
I just love the sheer retardation of Patrick a lot more at this point. His fat gunt also brings one of my favorite lolcows in the site, the fatman "Butterknife Lover" Shane Nokes.
 
Chris Chan is goofier, but Patrick is more comedic. It's like comparing slapstick to a crafted joke. It is funny seeing Chris Chan randomly decide to do stupid things like exercise by lifting soda cartons and claiming he's lifting 100 pounds, but most of his antics are because he's too dumb to know any better. Patrick is funny because he should know better, he just actively chooses not to. While both are victims of circumstance given the fact much of their engagement is driven by trolling, Patrick has the capacity to fix his issues but lets his ego completely blind him.

In addition, Chris Chan is charming in his own way, at least until he went off the deep end, but Patrick is smug, annoying, and incredibly idiotic. While Chris had his own ego, it was still amusing because of how absurd it was, and so it's entertaining seeing how highly he thinks of himself, like when he believed Shigeru Miyamoto would be starstruck meeting Chris because of his hideous comic. Patrick's ego, on the other hand, pretends to be grounded in reality, and that's what makes it much more irritating than Chris's. And Chris was only mean when he was crossed in some way, even though he tended to overreact. Patrick is mean for the sake of being mean, and unlike Chris who was too eager to accept anyone who approached him as a friend, Patrick defaults to assuming he is speaking to an enemy.

Patrick's misfortunes just feel better to watch because the guy absolutely deserves it. While I do find Chris's history enthralling, Patrick's antics have made me laugh much more, especially since he is the exact amount of dumb he needs to be to always give funny stories without requiring extensive understanding of his past and how weird he can be. I can't talk to anyone but Chris Chan aficionados about Chris humping a PlayStation 3 for five minutes, but I can tell everyone about the story of a man who decided to swim in the saltiest body of water on earth thinking his "water resistant" phone was waterproof and trying to sue the company for his own mistake.
 
Chris is just boring and his alogs and weens are the biggest faggots ever who are desperate for a return to the mid to late 2000's when Chris content was actually funny.

Rick is constantly hilarious. His snide "holier than thou" attitude, his way of responding to literally everyone and everything, his unfortunate appearance, the tone he speaks in, the shenanigans he partakes in, everything. As someone once said, he's natures piñata.
 
Chris is better simply for his legendary status as being the OG TRUE & HONEST™ Internet lolcow. Marvin the Pickle Man, Clyde Cash, Blue Spike, and Liquid Chris come to mind as being some of the greatest trolls in the history of the Internet. But that era of Chris Chan is long gone. With that said, Fatrick at the moment is more entertaining as a lolcow than Chris but at some point he will become stale and be a rather minor lolcow compared to Chris.

Simply put, Chris is more memorable than Patrick.
 
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