Funniest boner you've ever made - when the whole room laughed and you had no idea why

[Monika H.]

Hey!
Made you read, eh???
What's the funniest boner or gaffe you've ever made? Did you get embarrassed, or laughed with the others?
Kiwis, share your boners!

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

I ran into a door once. Managed to laugh it off with a bunch of friends.

 

[Desire Lines]

I've never made a boner before, but you've inspired me. Behold, my masterpiece:

dick

 

[Army Burger]

When I was in junior/senior high I was in a choir. We were getting close to a concert and so our conductor was asking us about the ways in which we could promote it. People suggested the internet, posters, stuff like that. I had the bright idea of suggesting word-of-mouth, but instead of saying that, I ended up saying mouth-to-mouth by accident. Everyone got a good laugh out of that.

 

[Monika H.]

It happened last Summer, in a short trip of
to the lake of Garda. We were eating an ice-cream, when a little bird flew on my leg and stayed here.
I said, blissfully unaware, something of the like "Oh, mi è venuto un uccello sulla gamba!" which roughly translates as "Oh, a cock came up on my leg!".
Everyone, including my Italian friends, still laugh about it nowadays.

 

[dunbrine47]

A few years ago I had a summer job up in the Adirondacks. It involved a lot of garbage collection and lawnmowing.
Our "garbage truck" was a Ford pickup that had a dump bed installed on it instead of the standard issue bed. The two people who collected the trash stood on a platform on the back that was attached to the trailer hitch.
One day I was out on a collection run. One of the stops involved the dining room kitchen that was on top of a hill. It was raining and where I held on to the truck was a little wet.
The person driving must have going a bit fast because we make a tight left onto the road that takes up the hill. One second I'm on the truck, the next I've been flung off. Looking back at I fell quite gently considering. I landed on my stomach (basically glided off) and only got a few scrapes. I walk up the hill to find a sink and wash off. While I'm walking up there was a group of wait staff who saw what happened and watched me casually walk up the hill. The funny part is that they were trying to figure out how badly injured I was. Once they saw that I was fine they had their permission to laugh.
I clean up and get back to business. Later in the day the person who was driving the truck (my supervisor) told me not to talk about the event to nobody less it get to the higher ups. Here is the last plot twist: the waiters were not the only people I walked past. The other group of people had the head of the resort and the head of my department with them and they said nothing.

 

[ES 148]

I am the Joker

 

[Piss Clam]

Wasn't a boner, but I didn't shake afterwards (otherwise it would be a boner) and got a piss circle on my shorts.

So some of the women were laughing at the piss circle. I was...meh we've been hiking hundreds of miles and you've shit and pissed right next to the trail, but my piss circle makes you laugh.

Made me think of why I just don't carry tissue like a woman. A little dab then I'm not wasting my time slapping my junk back and forth before I put it back in my pants.

A few years ago I had a summer job up in the Adirondacks.

The Adirondacks are beautiful.

 

[RG 448]

I was a clumsy and awkward teenager, so I was constantly getting into physical and social mishaps that my peers found amusing. I was even more clumsy when I’d just woken up. So really, puberty was nothing but boners, and the worst boners came in the morning. Hell, high school was basically just one long, giant, stretched out boner. It was hard at first, but once I learned to laugh with my classmates, it felt great to know my boners were making people happy. After that my only problem was all the unwanted erections.

 

[oh look another tomofag]

i came on my balls that was funny i guess

 

[Tragi-Chan]

I was in the pub and they’d just had a plate glass door installed. After my fifth pint I forgot it was there and walked straight into it. The entire pub found it highly risible. So did I, eventually, when my nose stopped throbbing.

 

[Ass eating cunt]

I was watching Infinity War with some friends and, I'll just say it didn't help Thanos was on screen for such a long time.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

I once had a huge tear in my pants that I didn't notice until somebody pointed it out.

All the 'random' giggling I had heard earlier that day suddenly made a lot more sense.