Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%
  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%
  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%
  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%

  • Total voters
    626
I noticed that, and we suspect she started working there after the marriage. I know that times are different and changing your last name isn't a given anymore, but still.

Phil was talking about changes in Kat's schedule starting in Sept 2018 and through Dec 2018, so it's possible she switched jobs somewhere in there, which would explain why she might have her maiden name in there.
 
And now we know why his car has so few miles on it. She's the only one driving it, and she doesn't go far.

This is what her commute looks like
Screen Shot 2020-02-05 at 4.50.35 PM.png


This is also what "running around getting groceries and doing errands all day" looks like on Phil's days off.
 
This is what her commute looks like


This is also what "running around getting groceries and doing errands all day" looks like on Phil's days off.
Damn, He can drop off his lady, stop by the credit union and take out a loan, and hit the DQ Grill and Chill for his chill late night stream, all in about 15 minutes. Pretty cool, right?
 
Look at all that fast food, fast food right nearby. They probably live half the time on taco bell.
Look how close Taco Bell is to Fred Meyers. So instead of a 20 second longer drive to the grocery store for the missing rice that one night, they just got fast food instead.

Sheesh.
 
So presumably Phil is always buying things at Fred Meyers not only because of its short distance from the WAkhando, but also because Khat gets an employee discount?
 
This explains so much, like why Phil has to meticulously shave and shower for the weekly Fred Meyers grocery run. He will be seen by Khat's co-workers, so she likely insists he cleans up and not look like a slob for fear of embarrassment when she goes in her next work day and everyone is gossiping about that greasy, neckbearded, balding fat guy with bingo wings who showed up earlier in the week to buy a package of canned tomatoes and bags of white sugar.
 
This explains so much, like why Phil has to meticulously shave and shower for the weekly Fred Meyers grocery run. He will be seen by Khat's co-workers, so she likely insists he cleans up and not look like a slob for fear of embarrassment when she goes in her next work day and everyone is gossiping about that greasy, neckbearded, balding fat guy with bingo wings who showed up earlier in the week to buy a package of canned tomatoes and bags of white sugar.

I wonder if he needs permission to snort in fred meyer
 
I wonder if he needs permission to snort in fred meyer
We've seen on his spahnsored shtreems that he has the ability to control the snort output. When he goes out, he probably at most clears his throat a few times, but is otherwise there to carry khet's shit as they further go into financial ruin silently.
 
This explains so much, like why Phil has to meticulously shave and shower for the weekly Fred Meyers grocery run. He will be seen by Khat's co-workers, so she likely insists he cleans up and not look like a slob for fear of embarrassment when she goes in her next work day and everyone is gossiping about that greasy, neckbearded, balding fat guy with bingo wings who showed up earlier in the week to buy a package of canned tomatoes and bags of white sugar.

Actually, what it doesn't explain is "why the hell doesn't Kat just do the grocery shopping herself?"

I used to wonder when DSP talked about how on weekends they would be running out of food why Kat couldn't just stop at the store on the way home? Now it's even more bizarre because SHE WORKS THERE!

There's only two possible explanations why Kat doesn't just do the grocery shopping herself:
1) Kat refuses to.
2) DSP doesn't allow her to.
 
Actually, what it doesn't explain is "why the hell doesn't Kat just do the grocery shopping herself?"

I used to wonder when DSP talked about how on weekends they would be running out of food why Kat couldn't just stop at the store on the way home? Now it's even more bizarre because SHE WORKS THERE!

There's only two possible explanations why Kat doesn't just do the grocery shopping herself:
1) Kat refuses to.
2) DSP doesn't allow her to.
If he let Khat do the grocery shopping unsupervised, he would be back on the dreaded all-potato and tuna casserole diet all day every day. He has to accompany her so that he can pick up the ingredients for his genuine and authentic ancestral 25% Italian cuisine
 
2) DSP doesn't allow her to.
Phil still does his planned out meals for the week, and also plans out his grocery trips. If Kat picks anything up while at work, it'll throw off all of Phil's plans. I think that's the real reason he was so upset over not having rice for their meal a week or two ago. Not because they had to get Taco Bell (yes, that one that's in the parking lot of Fred Meyer) and they got their order wrong.
 
Phil never let Leanna grocery shop unsupervised either.

Phil demands control over weird shit in his life. Also if she got stuff herself he wouldnt have an excuse to get 3 meals out and go to the arcade and IKEA and all the other bullshit he does.
 
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