Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%
  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%
  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%
  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%

  • Total voters
    626
I'd like to point out the inaccuracy of asstons depiction of Khet. She wouldn't be sitting there like an antidepressant hopped up lump she would be looking away scraping her fork on her plate seething with the passive aggressiveness of five Beckys cause we know from subaruman and the audio leaks shes a brooding bitch.
 
Maybe one day DoorDash will get the technology for international delivery and she can try all the treats she could ever want without leaving the stable.
Uhhh, they already do morahn
All you have to do is go across all the time zones backwards so it arrives when (or perhaps even before) you order it, therefore it’s still fresh and yummy and robust. But the book-smart NERDS at DoorDash haven’t figured that one out yet. 🙄
 
It's funny to imagine that, since the Kino Casino leaks confirm he loses sleep over detractors, Phil would force Khet to take ozempic and workout because he is genuinely fuming over detractors mocking him for having Fat Khet as his wife.
Would if he wasn't more bothered about what LTG is saying now instead (and gay.)
If Kat was actually working out and had lost weight, it would be literally all Phil would be talking about, the same way that he did a few sets of curls (with a barbell or a dumbbell, he's not sure which one) and now he's a "buff" fitness expert.
 
No matter what Kat dresses up as, she'll always look like a swimsuit model to me.
OIP (5).webp
 
Something for the weekend

Do you think Kat's been fucked even once this year? Not by phil obviously but since we know Jasper isn't allowed outside to explore that means it falls on Kat as the only one in the burnell household who has any chance of getting some.

If she still works (phil said she does so automatic X but I try to be an optimist) maybe she found herself a feeder colleague to ply her with pastry and an extra treat on the side.

I kinda hope she has and not even as a dunk on phil either. Some actual fun human interaction with someone other than phil (as evidenced by Leanna and others) is all it takes for them to wake up and realize there's more to life than four walls, doordash and vidya ad nauseam.
 
feeder colleague to ply her with pastry and an extra treat on the side.
I'll adlib what I wrote on the AI boyfriend thread about a girl who cheated on her boyfriend with an AI Arthur Morgan. Khet probably roleplays as a horse being ridden across Skyrim while the Dragonborn gives her sugar cubes, sweetrolls and CHEEEEEESE FOR EVERYONE.
 
Do you think Kat's been fucked even once this year?
No, and I'd bet heavily she hasn't since leaving Michigan. Not just because Ewww, Phil but her behavior in that Subaruman drama screams woman who is done with men. And obviously, she looks done with men now also.
 
Saying that their streams together had no chemistry is overselling it, it had negative chemistry. Rather than roommates who barely knew each other, they had this awkward small talk like they're two friends from high school who met up 20 years later and whose lives went in such completely different directions that they have absolutely nothing in common anymore.
Kat and Phil have the chemistry of two coworkers who can’t stand each other but are stuck working on the same project and just trying to get through the day. I’ve seen grocery store greeters with random customers show more genuine connection than those two do in their marriage
 
No, and I'd bet heavily she hasn't since leaving Michigan. Not just because Ewww, Phil but her behavior in that Subaruman drama screams woman who is done with men. And obviously, she looks done with men now also.
I don't know. I've seen some cartoons on YouTube where Kat was having sex with a black man.
 
Do you think Kat's been fucked even once this year?

No I don’t. Hell, I don’t think she’s had sex in two or more years. They already didn’t like each other and now she’s a fat disgusting cow that not even a nasty slob like Phil would fuck.

I can’t think of many people who would fuck a woman as ugly as Kat. It would at minimum take another man who is morbidly obese or perhaps some sort of deformity. This bitch has to realize her life is effectively over, she’s trashed her body and all her prospects. What a miserable story.
 
tens of thousands of niggers would, i'm sure
Ordinarily I would make a typical Lowtiergod joke at this point (it would fit perfectly because he's the nigger DSP) but him and Phil share such a perfect and unrequited love (I mean Phil takes his fashion advice at this point and that's pretty gay in itself) and out of respect for "what could be" between Phil and LTG if they finally get around to actually having gay sex instead of just talking about it all day long on stream, I won't make that joke.

(You see, I'm a romantic at heart - in my world or to be more autistic, in my "Sims 2" save of DSP's life, I want to see him and LTG hook up so desperately)
 
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