Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

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Guess Kat's weight.

  • >200 lbs.

    Votes: 22 3.5%

  • 200 lbs.-250 lbs.

    Votes: 125 20.0%

  • 250 lbs.- 300 lbs.

    Votes: 110 17.6%

  • Damn that's a huge bitch.

    Votes: 369 58.9%
  • Total voters
    626
SoapQueen1 said:
It's possible Kat was looking for a daddy and Subaru man was too young to be that type of boyfriend.
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Kat was using his ex for money so im pretty sure that if Phil wasnt making bank she would not be with him,she just wants a beta that will provide a house and pay for everything. Also Phil is begging for 1200$ for the tax guy,kat cloud easily pay for that since she work but she doesnt so I have to assume that while Phil pays for everything Kat money is hers only,im sure she is hiding all his cash under the mattress so if they divorce she doesnt have to share his savings with Phil.

But in any case I doubt Kat would leave Phil, she cant do better than him since she has no redeeming qualities and if at some point Phil has to stop streaming because its just not profitable for him, at that point Kat will be to old to latch on to another beta provider,if she is ugly now I cant imagine how she will look once she is in her 40s.
 
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MoonRocker said:
She is settling and is not going anywhere.
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This is right, I think. People call her a "gold digger" but I think it's just her being realistic. She knows she's never going to amount to much on her own, so her life plan has to involve getting married. And... well, if that involves somewhat more gout than she hoped, that's just how it is.
 
Khet is totally settling. But, she'll occasionally catch the eye of someone younger and who has more than one ab, and she'll fool around with him. Phil, being the hermit, will never know. He'll have his suspicions, but since he never leaves the gouter rim, he will just take it in stride. At the end of the day, she'll still come back to the juniper barn, prepare a Schwan's meal, and pretend her rare dalliances never happened.
 
Kosher Dill said:
That's right, Phil's not fat, he just has one huge ab left over from his bodybuilding days :lol:
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It's true that you lose muscle over time if you don't constantly work out, but even to my surprise I've kept the core muscle in my abdomen. People like to troll and say, "Oh, Phil's fat," but what they don't realize is what they're seeing is my core muscle just pushing on the little bit of loose skin left because I've lost so much weight over the past year since muh gor-- muh wife, Khet, gives thumb has been cooking me healthier food, you see what I mean? So Phil's not fat, it's just a bunch of idiots who don't know what they're talking about trying to spread misinformation about me, yet AGAIN Giant T-Pose
 
JackDavis said:
DSP never said this. Some dude in his chat (possible detractor, I forget) said this, people made fun of him saying this, and through the game of Telephone it has become "Phil called Kat a model". Just like how people believe Phil said he was scratching his leg when it was some random YT comment that said this.
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I feel quite sure he did say something like this though, but it was before she was revealed maybe?

Where's @EddyB43 when you need him!
 
JackDavis said:
DSP never said this. Some dude in his chat (possible detractor, I forget) said this, people made fun of him saying this, and through the game of Telephone it has become "Phil called Kat a model". Just like how people believe Phil said he was scratching his leg when it was some random YT comment that said this.
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Never said it?:
https://clips.twitch.tv/GoldenResilientAlpacaCopyThis

I mean I guess the actual quote is she is "hot enough to be a swimsuit model" but it's almost the same thing.
 
ReentryPhantom said:
Never said it?:
https://clips.twitch.tv/GoldenResilientAlpacaCopyThis

I mean I guess the actual quote is she is "hot enough to be a swimsuit model" but it's almost the same thing.
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Holy shit, the way he phrases it at the end: "I am very ha-- very happy... w--with Kat. I am very, very lucky to have her, let's put it that way."

The whole thing is weird, but the first half is super creepy the way he says it. I know the meme is that she's the equivalent of a Russian mail-order bride, but it legit comes across like that with the whole 'I'm very happy with Kat," thing, like it was the purchase of a new car he's pleased with.
 
Whether Phil is punching above his weight or not is a good questions. How filthy Khet is in the sack is a factor I guess. ( though I bet Phil trying to punch would be a bit like Niles Crane, he'd surely end up giving himself a black eye).
 
Synth said:
Holy shit, the way he phrases it at the end: "I am very ha-- very happy... w--with Kat. I am very, very lucky to have her, let's put it that way."

The whole thing is weird, but the first half is super creepy the way he says it. I know the meme is that she's the equivalent of a Russian mail-order bride, but it legit comes across like that with the whole 'I'm very happy with Kat," thing, like it was the purchase of a new car he's pleased with.
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She's the Wolverine toy that he never got. Only 1 ever made food.
 
Synth said:
Holy shit, the way he phrases it at the end: "I am very ha-- very happy... w--with Kat. I am very, very lucky to have her, let's put it that way."

The whole thing is weird, but the first half is super creepy the way he says it. I know the meme is that she's the equivalent of a Russian mail-order bride, but it legit comes across like that with the whole 'I'm very happy with Kat," thing, like it was the purchase of a new car he's pleased with.
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If you listen closely he actually says "I'm very happy with my curr-". He was going to say "current girlfriend", whoops.
 
MeganDodgedABullet said:
Whether Phil is punching above his weight or not is a good questions. How filthy Khet is in the sack is a factor I guess. ( though I bet Phil trying to punch would be a bit like Niles Crane, he'd surely end up giving himself a black eye).
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Considering that Panda only gave him "underwear time," it's reasonable to assume that any weight punching that goes on is Phil digging below his gunt flap to find his micro peen when Khet trots around in a designer saddle before getting a Jim session in.
 
The subject of Kat getting pregnant or Phil having kids gets brought up in his chat pretty frequently. Phil adamantly denies this and does not want kids. They will not have kids. Stop asking about kids.

When Kat gets pregnant will this damage his reputation with the fans since he will be revealed lying once again? Or will he try the "I wasn't lying, it was a brilliant trick" line like the wedding lie?
 
Sparkletor said:
The subject of Kat getting pregnant or Phil having kids gets brought up in his chat pretty frequently. Phil adamantly denies this and does not want kids. They will not have kids. Stop asking about kids.

When Kat gets pregnant will this damage his reputation with the fans since he will be revealed lying once again? Or will he try the "I wasn't lying, it was a brilliant trick" line like the wedding lie?
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"Bullshit! I was blaahking! See?"
holds up used condom to webcam
 
Sparkletor said:
The subject of Kat getting pregnant or Phil having kids gets brought up in his chat pretty frequently. Phil adamantly denies this and does not want kids. They will not have kids. Stop asking about kids.

When Kat gets pregnant will this damage his reputation with the fans since he will be revealed lying once again? Or will he try the "I wasn't lying, it was a brilliant trick" line like the wedding lie?
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He can't tell his fans about it because the detractors will find the OBGYN and SWAT the clinic DOOD!
 
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