Naming Bebe: will you pay me for naming your babers?

[We Are The Witches]

What if I told you that someone could get rid of the gargantuan conundrum that is thinking for a name that you'll give your next baby? And what if I told you that it could be as cheap as 250-400 US dollars?

THAT, is what Naming Bebe does! Colleen Slagen, an expert baby name consultant will help you to find the best names for your children and will do so for a reasonable price.

---

As she states in the video, the first important choice you're making as a parent is giving this piece of identity to your baby, so what better than to hire someone to do it for you? I mean, it's not like you can just ask for naming suggestions on the Internet or something, because randos are not qualified for this task, so Naming Bebe is filling that void in the market.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNUZvR3fNcg

---

What do you think? Is this the new reading your horoscope but lazier? The problem with haters is that they don't know the amount of skill and dedication this requires:

Inform yourself in:
https://www.namingbebe.com/
https://www.tiktok.com/@namingbebe
https://www.instagram.com/namingbebe/

 

[Cats]

My name is Spraynard, but my friends all call me "Spray".

 

[rebel]

Male Names Mike John Bob Bill Cody
Female Names Sarah Andrea Lauren Laura Luna
Gender Neutral Names C3P0 X Æ A-12

 

[Dufe]

I picked a name for her. Ed.

 

[MrTroll]

$400? For that price you might as well just spring for an abortion.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

$400 a consultation? If she pretended to be a shaman living out of LA or something she could probably make way more than that. Rich snobby people would pay you a load of money for expert baby naming consultations.

"I love the name 'Keppler' but what if we changed the last E to a U? On one end it is rounded like a well worn stone, shaped into harmony with its environment and ever rolling forward, and on the other end it is like a goblet waiting to be filled with knowledge and understanding. Unlike the E, jagged, stabbing its way forward in ignorance."

"Thanks baby namer, here's $8,000".

Then the baby naming expert would give them a goody bag of shrooms and homeopathic lavender incense and they'd leave.

 

[Inside your walls]

I remember seeing a post explaining why these types of baby naming business exists. Basically the biggest customers of these business tend to be foreigners that live in the west and want to
give their children western names while still being appropriate fitting with their own culture.

This post actually goes well explaining this, granted this was about another woman who does similar
stuff/name consultation but I think the point still stands.


I do think it's very absurd to charge 400$ for it though.

 

[paroom paroom]

If you've read books on psychogenealogy, you'll be aware of the importance of names. Names can be a curse or a blessing, or a mix of both. You might think this is a bunch of nonsense, but we tend to inherit trauma or patterns (and also positive traits) from people in our lineage with the same name. Names, like all words hold specific vibrations*, so they're like a sort of powerful charm that you're bestowing on a child. We'd be wise to choose them with great care.
In many fairy tales there are characters with unknown names, and when they're revealed some of their power wanes. The best example of this is Rumpelstiltskin.

*for more information on this I highly recommend this documentary on the work of the late Japanese water researcher Masaru Emoto, Messages from Water:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P78VZzaHDVA&t=244s

If you intend to avoid influencing your child by giving them a name that's outside of the family history, you could hire someone to research your ancestry (and in the process get a lot more valuable information about your ancestors that could help you with patterns you want to dissolve/transmute), but spending your money on someone who will just pick some names out for you seems like a total waste of money. Also, NPC behaviour at its worst.

"I love the name 'Keppler' but what if we changed the last E to a U? On one end it is rounded like a well worn stone, shaped into harmony with its environment and ever rolling forward, and on the other end it is like a goblet waiting to be filled with knowledge and understanding. Unlike the E, jagged, stabbing its way forward in ignorance."

I'd be flawless at this, and this particular character sounds extremely fun, if I didn't have integrity I'd be so good at it, ugh.