Post your friends secrets in this thread

[W00K #17]

Post secrets you know about your anonymous friends that they don't know you know about them, or post things that your anonymous friends have told you in confidence.


I once fixed a friends laptop and found tons of tranny hentai porn in a poorly disguised folder. I never told him about it but it does make me think twice about certain things he says now.

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

Hey you aren’t @Heinrich Himmler

 

[Rand /pol/]

@Tranhuviya is Japanese

 

[Tranhuviya]

@Tranhuviya is Japanese

Gaijin die in flame.

 

[Le Pew]

I had a work friend once who told me his biggest fetish was for him to pee between his girlfriends legs while she sat on the toilet. I don't think he wanted to pee on her, just have her siting there. He also liked to pop other peoples pimples. Shockingly, he did indeed work on a help desk in IT.

 

[JB 236]

haha i don't have friends

 

[felicity]

While fixing my (genuinely autistic) uncle's laptop one time I had the misfortune of opening Chrome and seeing that all of his top visited sites were MLP porn

also this chick I met on Discord tried to kill someone when she was thirteen and afaik I'm the only person she's ever told

 

[Tranhuviya]

haha i don't have friends

because you refuse to accept them as such.

 

[Rand /pol/]

While fixing my (genuinely autistic) uncle's laptop one time I had the misfortune of opening Chrome and seeing that all of his top visited sites were MLP porn

Hello niece

 

[BeanBidan]

An ex-friend tried to kill herself by hanging from a ceiling fan but it broke on her as soon as she kicked the chair out from under her.

Edit:she kept saying it was god's will for her to live and make something out of herself
She was just fat

 

[_Clam_]

@Kiwi Jeff is actually a Crocodile not an Alligator

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

@W00K #17 has a micropenis.

 

[ES 148]

My friend is a bus

 

[RG 448]

I snuck onto my friend’s laptop and found a fuckton of amateur hardcore bondage porn on his external harddrive which is how I found out he stole my external harddrive.

 

[W00K #17]

@W00K #17 has a micropenis.

We're supposed to post things that are SECRET in this thread. Everybody knows that.

 

[Midlife Sperglord]

A coworker of mine once called in sick and said it was the flu. The reality was that he had a Southern Comfort hangover. He can’t bring himself to drink that crap again, though.

 

[Wheezy Asthmatic]

One of my friends (who I'm not friends with anymore) was convinced he could receive FREE electroshock therapy to wipe his memory and be placed into a protection program just because he didn't like living with his mother anymore.
He was 25.
Works with kids as a costume performer for parties.

 

[BerriesArnold]

A neighbor of ours fooled a much older married man(60-70's?) into impregnating her for the sole purpose of making money off of the kid through child support. Karma is such a bitch that the kid turned out to be a menace that's been kicked out of elementary school for his behavior. Long story short, the woman regrets ever having that kid and tells us all about how big a mistake he was. In essence, she played herself.

 

[Guts Gets Some]

Just what I needed.

This guy I know (I struggle to use the word friend, but I'll humor the notion just to share his secret) who sleeps with women regularly, and even though he has steady girlfriends, he's constantly on the prowl for more, sometimes without even telling them. His mentality is "It'll hurt them more to find that out" so he thinks he's protecting them by keeping them in 'ignorant bliss'.

Turns out that years back, when he was a lot younger, some older woman he was with almost demanded he make her a molded dildo of himself. She didn't love him or want him at all past that, she just wanted his dick again for her own use without him. (Can't say I blame her).
And he freaked out about it, almost like an autistic child in being disturbed by the notion.
So that disturbed him, when a woman essentially adopts the same strategy as him; but it's totally benevolent when he does it?

That's more of the pro-male and anti-female bias that defines his entire warped personality.


Thank you for this topic. I ironically swore I'd never tell that, but I've actually just waiting for the chance to. He's such a piece of shit; no sympathy from me.

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

A neighbor of ours fooled a much older married man(60-70's?) into impregnating her for the sole purpose of making money off of the kid through child support. Karma is such a bitch that the kid turned out to be a menace that's been kicked out of elementary school for his behavior. Long story short, the woman regrets ever having that kid and tells us all about how big a mistake he was. In essence, she played herself.

Good.