RIP Thread

Guess OJ finally ran out of... juice.
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Wanna add to the OJ stuff.

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OJ CAN’T TRICK ST. PETER​

Cartoon published 04/12/2024

OJ Simpson passed away on April 11th at the age of 76. He lost his battle with cancer.

Few people have experienced such a fall from grace as OJ Simpson. Simpson was an all-American running back for the USC Trojans and won the Heisman trophy his senior season in 1968, along with the Maxwell Award and Walter Camp Award. After graduating, he was selected by the Buffalo Bills as the number one overall pick in the 1969 draft. He spent nine seasons with the team before spending the last two with the San Francisco 49ers. He retired as the 2nd all-time leading rusher in NFL history and was selected to the Pro Football hall of fame in 1985.

OJ had a career in TV and movies after his football career ended. He was in three ‘Naked Gun’ movies and also was a commentator for ‘Monday Night Football.’ Simpson was beloved by all and seemed to live an enchanted life.

Everything changed on June 12, 1994 when his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her friend Ron Goldman were found brutally murdered. Five days later, OJ led police on a slow speed chase in the now famous white Bronco, which was televised across the country. OJ Simpson eventually stopped and gave himself up.

Then the ‘trial of the century’ was broadcast nationwide. People were glued to their TV sets as the murder details and evidence unfolded.


OJ hired a ‘dream team’ of famous lawyers including Johnnie Cochrane, Robert Shapiro, F. Lee Bailey, Robert Kardashian and Alan Dershowitz. Attacking the LA police as ‘racist’ was their main strategy. No one could forget the defining moment when Simpson put on the glove that was left at the crime scene. He stretched his hand bigger so the glove seemed too small. OJ, being a professional actor, used his skills and mugged to the cameras as he “struggled” to put on the glove. The trial lasted nearly a year. Simpson was found not guilty of murdering Nicole Brown Simpson and Goldman on October 3, 1995.

“If the glove doesn’t fit, you must acquit,” was Johnnie Cochran’s famous line.

The entire nation was shocked as obvious forensic evidence was ignored by the jury. The 12 jurors who decided Simpson’s criminal case verdict was comprised of 10 women and two men of different races. In an initial vote, USA Today reported that 10 out of the 12 jurors voted to acquit Simpson and by the second vote, after some deliberation, the jury returned a unanimous decision of not guilty.

Even though Simpson had gotten away with murder, his former easy life was long gone. Simpson was treated as a Pariah, an outcast. The families of Nicole Brown Ronald Goldman successfully sued Simpson in a 1997 civil trial. He was ordered to pay 33 million dollars to the families. He never did.

Karma caught up with Simpson in 2007 when he was found guilty of breaking into a Vegas hotel room in an attempt to recover sports memorabilia that he believed had been stolen from him. He confronted the owner with several of his cronies, armed with weapons and waving guns around threatening the victim. This time Johnnie Cochran wasn’t there to help OJ out and on December 5, 2008, Simpson was sentenced to 33 years in prison with eligibility for parole in nine years. On July 20, 2017, Simpson was granted parole and began to track down the real killer of Ron and Nicole as he promised. Just kidding. He hit the golf courses.


OJ Simpson was a great football player and a beloved actor. He had a life many could envy, but he threw it all away when he killed his ex-wife and an innocent man who was just returning a pair of glasses left by Nicole in the restaurant in which he served. Ron Goldman was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

OJ Simpson is now facing his final judgment.

—The GrrrTeam
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Everything changed on June 12, 1994 when his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her friend Ron Goldman were found brutally murdered. Five days later, OJ led police on a slow speed chase in the now famous white Bronco, which was televised across the country. OJ Simpson eventually stopped and gave himself up.
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I just don't get how all of these new articles get this part of the story so wrong. A.C. Cowlings, O.J's friend and former NFL teammate was the one driving, and owned, the Bronco. He famously was even on a phone call with the police during the whole chase. I mean, for fucks sake, that was legitimately one of the top cultural image moments from the 90s, it was seen by over 100 million people live on almost every news channel, and it interrupted the NBA finals. Journoscum who pride themselves on taking every opportunity they can to "fact-check" their opponents can't be bothered to get even the most basic and well-known pop-culture factoids correct. 4vOgJVJF.jpeg
 
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