The Tom Deadpool - Here we place our Bets on the Expected Lifespan of a Nearly-Dead Hobo.

[Done]

How long do the inhabitants of God's green earth have to put up with Tom?

Place your bets in the poll above, and if you win, a certain powerful and wealthy global organization may be willing to reward you with something.

 

[RP 520]

I'm going with 5-10 years, unless RNG on his trash eating has him pick up something like botulism.

 

[Army Burger]

TBH I think he'll die by the end of 2024

 

[obliviousbeard]

Well, honestly hard to say - despite the COPD, frying his brains with drugs and shit nutrition he seems to go on like a cockroach.

 

[The Crow]

I'll give it another 2-5 years before his COPD makes him croak.

 

[Hackallier]

He has 5 years max left on him.

 

[I am a nigger]

My grandfather had a number of debilitating incurable diseases over the course of his life, he was tremendously lucky in that he was able to receive regular treatment, and paradoxically, going to the doctor uncovered many diseases in their early stages. He lived to be 92. What is the point of this? Sometimes diseased things live the longest.

 

[Tranhuviya]

That which is dead can never die.

 

[ObeseScreamingBlackMan]

2-5 years if by natural causes.

Less than 2 if he’s killed by some cholo in the barrio he lives in.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

2-5, shot and killed while dumpster diving.

 

[Coldgrip]

2 to 5 years by natural causes, sooner possibly by one of the rando hippies/ bums he periodically takes in.

 

[Junkail]

Never. He has been immortalized by the internetz.

 

[Literal Rabbit]

2-5 years, he'll die by choking on a plastic six pack container while digging through trash.

Remember to always recycle.

 

[Dee Price]

oh he is a cockroach so soon as someone sprays raid on him.

 

[AnOminous]

I think he'll live a bit longer than 5 years. COPD is a slow killer but already on its way. However, he'll get more feeble as it progresses, meaning he'll be unable to do a lot of the things likely to kill him faster.

 

[Feline Darkmage]

2-5 either from shitlung and cockroaches eating his immobile old man body or he goes out with a bang like he threatened to do and suicides by cop. We'll get blamed for it either way tho so lol.

 

[Knojkamarangasan_#4]

Call me optimistic but I’d say around 5-10 years at least, he may be a wreck but I’ve seen even people like him live quite unexpectingly long.

 

[Xanax]

He's been dead for years. Inside his body are millions of bacteria that have evolved enough to move around as a colony, and Tom's rotting corpse is just the host. They've replaced most of his organs, except his lungs which they need to take in marijuana smoke, which they feed on. Much like Tom is immune to changing for the better, the bacteria are immune to all medicines. When Tom's body is worn out, we're all fucked, because they'll break out and start multiplying inside other people.

Microbiologists have attempted to study this phenomenon, but none of them could stand the smell long enough to obtain samples.

 

[diophantines]

2-5 years is the safe, boring, sensible choice.

That's why I give him a year; he's destined for a death related to stupidity, I can feel it.

 

[BigTodd]

I voted 2-5. I hope he lasts to 2020 so we can see him chimp the fuck out when he doesn't get the magic vagina from the intergalactic space lizards that he claims he's been promised. Also, he has said he's going to murder/suicide if 2020 comes to pass without the return of said space lizards.