- Joined
- Jul 7, 2022
I think there is enough evidence linking Achilles to the historical Holy Finnic Imperator Väinämöinen XXI Spärde, and the Trojan Horse being a clear corruption of the Giza Mass Autism Array, but in case you don't believe me, I've laid out my arguments:
1. Homer recounts that the Mycenaean fleet encountered severe thunderstorms on its way to Troy, and a sacrifice to Artemis was required to subdue the storm. According to our fact checkers at the Pentagon, DARPA had not been invented yet in 1200 BCE (Before Christ's Era), and thus thunderstorms did not exist. However, the Bermuda Triangle was very turbulent during the 4460's BC (mostly due to Lemurian geomancy projects), thus we can safely place the "Mediterranean Sea" in the Caribbean, and the city of "Troy" in the Proto-Panama Supercanal (PanCan VII).
2. Achilles was recounted as having blond hair, but we all know that gayreeks are darker than the darkest tribe of niggers. If we assume Achilles had Finno-Hyperborean DNA, on the other hand, Homer's description of him makes more sense.
3. When Achilles arrived in "Troy", he did two things: behead the statue of Apollo (Tengri), and chase Hector around the city three times. The former only makes sense if Achilles was visiting a Hanguk-Turanian temple, and the latter only makes sense if Hector (Crown Prince Hae Lee-guk VI Hwan of Manchuria) had the powers of the famed Korean proto-ninjas (which he did).
4. Achilles died from getting shot in the ankle. If he were gayreek, his leghair would've shielded the blow.
5. When Agamemnon (King Wewuz I) returned home to Argos (Africa), he was cucked by his wife and killed. This is an exaggerated account, however. What really happened was Kween Clytamnaestra (come on, that's the most nappy-headed negress name I've ever heard. The jokes make themselves) asked Wewuz to pay child support and he left to buy cigarettes again.
6. When Odysseus has his run-in with the cyclops and slaughters them, he was actually exterminating a tribe of neanderthals (this is what Michael Crichton actually believes). The Odyssee was an oral recounting of the Third Neanderthal Genocide.
7. There is no record of Queen Dido, anywhere in North Africa. Aeneas founded Atlantis, not r*me.
8. Excalibur is often theorized to be the same sword that Brutus of Troy brought to Britain when he civilized it from the Celts. We know though carbon dating that this was actually the famed lightsaber of Finnic proto-Illyrian Jedi commander Xhëki Cën.
9. Orestes and Electra had hot passionate sex after they killed their mom. This is culturally-anomalous for a tale set in Greece, as we all know that incest is only found in anime, and anime is Chinese.
Try to prove me wrong, westoid
1. Homer recounts that the Mycenaean fleet encountered severe thunderstorms on its way to Troy, and a sacrifice to Artemis was required to subdue the storm. According to our fact checkers at the Pentagon, DARPA had not been invented yet in 1200 BCE (Before Christ's Era), and thus thunderstorms did not exist. However, the Bermuda Triangle was very turbulent during the 4460's BC (mostly due to Lemurian geomancy projects), thus we can safely place the "Mediterranean Sea" in the Caribbean, and the city of "Troy" in the Proto-Panama Supercanal (PanCan VII).
2. Achilles was recounted as having blond hair, but we all know that gayreeks are darker than the darkest tribe of niggers. If we assume Achilles had Finno-Hyperborean DNA, on the other hand, Homer's description of him makes more sense.
3. When Achilles arrived in "Troy", he did two things: behead the statue of Apollo (Tengri), and chase Hector around the city three times. The former only makes sense if Achilles was visiting a Hanguk-Turanian temple, and the latter only makes sense if Hector (Crown Prince Hae Lee-guk VI Hwan of Manchuria) had the powers of the famed Korean proto-ninjas (which he did).
4. Achilles died from getting shot in the ankle. If he were gayreek, his leghair would've shielded the blow.
5. When Agamemnon (King Wewuz I) returned home to Argos (Africa), he was cucked by his wife and killed. This is an exaggerated account, however. What really happened was Kween Clytamnaestra (come on, that's the most nappy-headed negress name I've ever heard. The jokes make themselves) asked Wewuz to pay child support and he left to buy cigarettes again.
6. When Odysseus has his run-in with the cyclops and slaughters them, he was actually exterminating a tribe of neanderthals (this is what Michael Crichton actually believes). The Odyssee was an oral recounting of the Third Neanderthal Genocide.
7. There is no record of Queen Dido, anywhere in North Africa. Aeneas founded Atlantis, not r*me.
8. Excalibur is often theorized to be the same sword that Brutus of Troy brought to Britain when he civilized it from the Celts. We know though carbon dating that this was actually the famed lightsaber of Finnic proto-Illyrian Jedi commander Xhëki Cën.
9. Orestes and Electra had hot passionate sex after they killed their mom. This is culturally-anomalous for a tale set in Greece, as we all know that incest is only found in anime, and anime is Chinese.
Try to prove me wrong, westoid
you can't
