Weird shit for sale

Philosophy Zombie

Philosophy Zombie

everything has its time and everything dies
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Oct 13, 2014
People sell the darnedest things, like a jug of milk that can be sent to your door for just 75 dollars. Don't worry, it's totally not going to perish. (NO REFUNDS OR RETURNS.) Or a book on cooking with man gravy. Or whatever the hell this is.

Runners up:
  • A personal sample of uranium ore. I'm not sure exactly why you would want this, but if you do, here it is.
  • BIC's line of "For Her" pens, for women who can't bear to have their delicate lady paws gripping a pen for big strong man hands. Of course, they cost considerably more than regular pens, but look! Some of them are pink!
  • The JL421 Badonkadonk.
  • Inflatable toast. It's not edible, but you can keep it in your pocket and it will leave no crumbs. Yay?
  • Fucking everything from SkyMall. Unfortunately (?), they're filing for bankruptcy (I don't really know how they managed to stay in business for so long, because I don't think anyone actually bought from them).
  • Nothing. How zen.
 
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild and silentprincess
There was a blog once called:

Itemnotasdescribed

It was one of my favorites. Cheeseburger took it over and it just fell by the wayside.

One of my favorite listings was the ability to buy this:

http://inadvertentriot.blogspot.com/2009/08/sasquatch-twin-or-amish-mannequin.html

An Amish manequin family.

I even saw someone trying to sell a used coffin.

Here is a link on how one such incident went down:

http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/201...for-sale-on-craigslist-with-a-surprise-inside

Don't know if this all counts as an LOLcow, but the sellers of these mighty fine finds are a special breed of person...
 
  • Winner
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild and CatParty
This really isn't a Lolcow thread, but yeah. I remember INAD, and its slow death under ICHC. It was the Amish family or the collection of cut dreadlocks.
 
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild
Xarpho said:
This really isn't a Lolcow thread, but yeah. I remember INAD, and its slow death under ICHC. It was the Amish family or the collection of cut dreadlocks.
Click to expand...

Should I ask a mod to move it to Off-Topic or something, then?
 
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild
One day I was typing different words and phrases into the Amazon search bar, trying to find a book I had forgotten the title of. A search of "nightclub" brought me to this mess.

Yes, that is a partially nude photo of the author on the cover. The description is even more confusing.
A Russian girl is learning to be a Ballet dancer at her mothers Ballet school .Her sister has just been adducted and the girl must leave the safety of her families home and find her sister before it is too late. Will she avoid the dangers of street life or will she lean some hard lessons along the way .Will she become a slave to drugs and prostitution like her friends on the street or will she rise to the top of the ballet world .While she is on the street she meets Michi her evil Japanese Lesbian lover ,and her good friend Black Billy .Meanwhile her Russian Mafia step father is trying to track her down and put her in jail for crimes she didn’t commit .He sadistic mother is no help to her and may even have bad intent of her own .Once you start reading this Film Noir mystery you will not want to put it down .From the streets of Manhattan’s lower east side to the bars and clubs of Brooklyn this is one hart stopping ,blood soaked thriller that keeps the pages turning.
 
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
  • Informative
Reactions: [Redacted]-san, Wildchild and MerriedxReldnahc
AWB-81 said:
It was one of my favorites. Cheeseburger took it over and it just fell by the wayside.
Click to expand...

Also reminds me of regretsy. The owner of the site started to act like she was a god or something, and she eventually shut it down. Now we just have pinterest to post bad etsy shit in.
 
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild
Philosophy Zombie said:
Click to expand...
Back-to-the-Future-Car-Delorean-DMC12-19811.jpeg
 
  • Winner
  • Informative
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: [Redacted]-san, Wildchild, Surtur and 1 other person
telegramsamo said:
One day I was typing different words and phrases into the Amazon search bar, trying to find a book I had forgotten the title of. A search of "nightclub" brought me to this mess.

Yes, that is a partially nude photo of the author on the cover. The description is even more confusing.
A Russian girl is learning to be a Ballet dancer at her mothers Ballet school .Her sister has just been adducted and the girl must leave the safety of her families home and find her sister before it is too late. Will she avoid the dangers of street life or will she lean some hard lessons along the way .Will she become a slave to drugs and prostitution like her friends on the street or will she rise to the top of the ballet world .While she is on the street she meets Michi her evil Japanese Lesbian lover ,and her good friend Black Billy .Meanwhile her Russian Mafia step father is trying to track her down and put her in jail for crimes she didn’t commit .He sadistic mother is no help to her and may even have bad intent of her own .Once you start reading this Film Noir mystery you will not want to put it down .From the streets of Manhattan’s lower east side to the bars and clubs of Brooklyn this is one hart stopping ,blood soaked thriller that keeps the pages turning.
Click to expand...


This is what I found in the related/recommended stuff below it.

[url=http://www.amazon.com/Dancing-Jesus-Featuring-Miraculous-Moves/dp/0762444142/ref=pd_rhf_dp_s_cp_4_Y0J2?ie=UTF8&refRID=15QWF12AV92CG8DSY3N0]Dancing With Jesus[/URL]

51-rnel%2BsGL.jpg
510FL-NRSWL.jpg


"Singing hymns of praise is standard practice—now it’s time to set your feet a-tapping with a collection of original dance moves inspired by Jesus and the likes of Moses and John the Baptist. Dances include: the Water Walk, the Temptation Tango, the Judas Hustle, and The Apostolic Conga. Each dance move is outlined with: how to, inspiration, and an illustration. Slyly irreverent but ultimately festive, Dancing with Jesus is illustrated in full color. Best of all, two of the dances are animated for full effect by a lenticular cover and last-spread finale, making this a truly one-of-a-kind novelty item!"
 
  • Like
  • Winner
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild, Linako 2.0 and telegramsamo
McRascal said:
This is what I found in the related/recommended stuff below it.

Dancing With Jesus

"Singing hymns of praise is standard practice—now it’s time to set your feet a-tapping with a collection of original dance moves inspired by Jesus and the likes of Moses and John the Baptist. Dances include: the Water Walk, the Temptation Tango, the Judas Hustle, and The Apostolic Conga. Each dance move is outlined with: how to, inspiration, and an illustration. Slyly irreverent but ultimately festive, Dancing with Jesus is illustrated in full color. Best of all, two of the dances are animated for full effect by a lenticular cover and last-spread finale, making this a truly one-of-a-kind novelty item!"
Click to expand...

Yeah, I found that one too. There's also "Almighty Sports With Jesus" (I strongly recommend reading the Amazon preview. It's hilarious).

51zZjhpjTmL.jpg
51grhHOn64L.jpg


I changed the title of this thread to include offline purchases, so if you find some weird things at your local grocery store or something, feel free to post it.
 
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild, Linako 2.0 and Watermelon1337
Not really for sale but around 2000 / 2001 I was involved in this WH40K forum that had a IC role playing board, there was this one guy who played the part of John Clease in the Life of Brian during the "Wolf Nipple chips" bit we knew him as Bob the lucky, he had perfect timing an was the forums version of Thought Dibbler from the disk world books at different times he had for sale;

Grox Nipple chips (his staple in trade).
Quill's made from Sagainus wing feathers, that on inspection appear to be from a shite hawk.... (took a 9 on a D20 to discover for some reason).
Ogrin Horn, for when your in the mood roll a 1 on a d100 you might just get lucky.
Bag's of the Emperors baby teeth, the vitillaty of Primarch Russ or half you money back.
Genuine Cadian Hell guns, that would pass inspection until you used it an it was just a repainted super soaker....

And in one sad RP, a Dreadnaught from a excommunicated astarties chapter he tried to sell it to one of the Fallen as a weekend driver (used care salesman joke) an the Dark Angels showed up just after the sale and turned him into a Servitor, his son replaced him but as a gritty reboot called Barry the Rat.
 
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild and Pickle Inspector
Haribo gummy bears—specifically, the sugar-free kind. They're really good and taste just like the regular ones, but the sweetener used in place of sugar is a known laxative. God forbid you eat more than a handful at once. The real schadenfreude comes from reading the reviews.

"the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited"
"gastrointestinal armageddon"
"my stomach then continued to rumble and gurgle like a dying whale calling out to its mother"
"I could have levitated off the seat of the toilet if I wasn't holding on to the handicapped bars for dear life"
"a shift of my insides that hit harder then anything I'd ever felt even during the two times I had given birth"
"it felt like the entirety of my inner self was dissolving and decaying inside me"
"I was no longer a husband or a father in that bathroom. I was a prisoner to my own body, weeping like no man should ever be allowed to weep like"
"evil, pure evil"

On the other hand, this is apparently good to give to annoying coworkers or roommates. Or for a colonoscopy.
 
  • Winner
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild, Big Nasty, tehpope and 1 other person
Check out this cool breast/ butt enhancing cream from Japan!
I'm gonna make my boobs even bigger and all men will love me!
 
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Wildchild
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back