What should you do if an alog comes to your house?

[ScatmansWorld]

Let's say worst comes to worst and you finally piss off a random internet user enough that they're stalking you outside your home. You have no idea how mentally stable they are or what intentions they have. How would/should you approach the situation?

 

[Breadbassket]

flip a coin to decide if I should call the police or order pizza for the both of us.

 

[NIGGO KILLA]

Shoot him with a gun and upload his body on the kiwifarms

 

[malleusmaleficarum]

i would resort to a technique which i like to call "the boogie's gambit"

 

[Fireman Sam]

Realistically... Call the cops and record them for evidence/quick kek I guess.
Or throw a bottle of vinegar and piss at them. Seeing as that's probably the attitude someone needs to have in order to go bounding up to some fucker's house.

i would resort to a technique which i like to call "the boogie's gambit"

99.9% to miss the target and end up in all sorts of legal shenanigans

 

[Battlecruiser3000ad]

Pin him to the ground and record his screams
the standard procedure for dealing with autists

 

[Sage In All Fields]

self defence situation

 

[Just A Butt]

Be having a poo and make someone else get the door.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

Exactly what you were doing before but with a gun somewhere in the vicinity.

Although realistically most A-logs are lonely weirdos so I'd probably be like "Hey, why you creeping around outside my house? What's the problem there big guy?" and then they can tell me about how they're having a tough time because they're a fat retard who nobody likes and we'll have a little cry about it and they can go on their way.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

Shoot him and then put a knife in both of his lifeless hands because I don't know if he was left or right handed.

 

[Apochrypha]

Shoot them probably.

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

Fire a warning shoot into the air at a school zone.

 

[Retink]

Tell them to wait outside while you put away your small dog, fetch your roommates gun, then stand in front of them for several minutes before firing a "warning" shot at the school across the street. Then cry online you're the victim.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

Ignore them until they go away. They'll get bored eventually and move on to alog a more responsive target.

 

[Chaos Theorist]

Be having a poo and make someone else get the door.

Maybe you should try ringing the police instead of being a coward

 

[Saint Agustin]

Just laugh at the retard and be done with it.

 

[Chocolate Wombat]

Call the cops, wait for them to show up, explain the situation and then take a nap.

 

[A-Stump]

Make a thread on kiwifarms asking what to do

 

[Amphotericin B]

Call the cops and have the strap ready just in case. I don’t answer the door if I’m not expecting anyone.

 

[Testacles Maximus]

Set up bear traps.