When Is It Too Late To Change Your Life Around?

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I'm going to try to not powerlevel but I wonder if I've just missed my chance to live a fulfilling life. I still work and have goals and have generally made some improvements in the last year or so. But there's this overwhelming sense that maybe things are just... never going to be normal. That I missed a key part of development or several milestones and the rest of my life is going to be playing catch up.
I'm not just applying this to myself but also across the board. I see the rise of the sigma/psuedo father figure types and the sheer amount of life hacks/self help/blackpill doomer cum bloomer/ religious revivalism out there for men and part of me thinks it's mostly a gigantic cope. I think that at a certain point if you don't have it together and you're just "that guy", you're probably going to stay "that guy". The idea that our teenage years and mental/physical development in them are more important than what a lot of people are led to believe now and that they can affect the rest of your life seems so terrifying of an idea of a lot of people will create any cope imaginable to avoid accepting that.
I've witnessed all the thumbnails for videos with titles like "I wasted my 20s and I'm glad..." or the hubris of "your 20s' are about finding yourself." No faggot, your 20s should be about scratching and clawing and doing everything in your godgiven power to achieve a higher place in life and get the basic aspects of adult life down. This is the not the time to be fucking around and wasting away.

I think a major problem we make in the US is not instilling a sense of discipline or developing skills at a young age. If you know what you want to be when you're younger and have the routine/control to develop at it, you're going to be so much further than any "late bloomer", it's insane. Early skill development is a superpower in it's own way that not many really understand how much of an affect it has. If you can learn to play an instrument, learn a sport or take up a craft and stick with it before the age of 15. The same goes with social queues and general wellbeing.
I understand that working out, developing a skill, and generally trying to get to a better place in life are not useless ideas and they will create results.
But I've seen some outright manchildren constantly saying "I have to change things around, I'm doing it." I mean people in their thiries and fourties and par of me just wants to tell them
"Dude... you're too late. You had an entire life to figure this shit out. It's pretty much over now. Your brain rot and shitty habits have made it all but impossible to even have the ability to ATTEMPT change. You're fucked."

I just see the housing, the hyperinflation, the lack of a community for a lot of people and the world changing and becoming more impossible to live in by the moment. I see a storm on the horizon and I haven't pitched a tent and it gets to me. I wonder if me or god forbid men worse than me can make due.
Now obviously there are cases of people changing their life around, sometimes at later age, but are they outliers? Is that possible to do anymore? I'd like to know your genuine thoughts on at what general age that's even possible. I truly think that if you don't have key aspects of your life sorted out by your early 30s' and getting ahead, you are essentially fucked. I also know me saying I've wasted my life on a forum instead of doing literally anything else is quite exceptional. But I really want some actual takes that aren't driven by coping or hubris or justification for failure. I understand things can change but can they ever change for what you truly thought you could be? Can you do a 180 in life late in the game or is better to just accept that you probably missed that train and should make due with what you have?

EDIT: Yeah on second thought I probably shouldn't be too retarded. Forgive the faggotry.

 

[Schwarzwald]

Mid-20s is SO damn young in the grand scheme of things. Especially in this day and age. Is it too late to become a professional baseball player? Probably. Is it too late to get a degree or meet a wife or start a family? Absolutely not.

I would put forth to you: what is it that you want to do/have in life?

If you don't know that: what kind of person do you want to be in life?

Once you know the answer to those questions, you next need to ask yourself: what are you doing, every day, to help achieve your aspirations?

If you haven't gotten to that step yet, you need to experience a variety of things in life and figure out the answers to those questions instead of wasting your life away. Read the Bible if you haven't, take a course on something you're interested in, pick up a hobby and meet people, etc..

You're feeding into a spiral of self-defeatism by lamenting it might be "too late". Your regrets will only pile up as you get older. It's decidedly not too late in your mid-20s to majorly change your life, but one day it will be. The more time you let pass by, the more opportunities close for you, and time passes by faster as you get older.

Cut out the "bad habits" from your life slowly. Being aware of them is the first step towards major change. You're the only one stopping yourself with excuses, not "brain rot" or whatever the hell you want to blame.

 

[McMitch]

Unironically: it’s never too late until you’re dead. There is no real timeline you need to worry about, anything else is just defeatist faggotry. If you have goals you wanted, work towards them: they may not be achieved in the way you expected, and you may find the goals that satisfied you weren’t the ones you wanted to, but none of that means you should give up. If anyone or anything tries to lay defeat at your table and tell you there’s no time left, the only real response is to spit in their face and keep trying.

 

[WelfareNiggerQueen]

Did you rape or murder someone? If you did you're going to have to troon out and run out the gas on that until for no reason whatsoever Hitler is elected.
Life is easier outside of the city, don't come. Nature is antisemtic

 

[Kermit Jizz]

The day you make an account here

 

[Magicicada_septendecula]

I'm nearing my 40s, and have reinvented myself a few times. I'm doing it again as we speak. I agree with @McMitch4kf that it's really only too late when you're dead, though I'd add the more things you've broken, physically or mentally, the harder it becomes. I thank god I never got into drugs, stayed fat for more than a few years, or had a record that involved more than a couple speeding tickets. It's never "too late" to change yourself overall, however the longer you go, and the worse decisions you made/continue to make will close doors and narrow possibilities.

 

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

Mid-20s is SO damn young in the grand scheme of things. Especially in this day and age. Is it too late to become a professional baseball player? Probably. Is it too late to get a degree or meet a wife or start a family? Absolutely not.

I would put forth to you: what is it that you want to do/have in life?

If you don't know that: what kind of person do you want to be in life?

Once you know the answer to those questions, you next need to ask yourself: what are you doing, every day, to help achieve your aspirations?

I will try not to powerlevel too much because I know this is probably going to deserve some puzzle pieces.
I primarily have creative interests. Drawing/writing. The problem is I and a lot of people were faggots when we were young and wanted to do everything and anything but never put in the time or concentration towards any goal, so in the end nothing was accomplished. Now I look at the majority of people who's works I admire and know how early of a start they got and how much of a work ethic they had and I feel like there's no way to bridge that gap.

I think the big issue people along my lines face is just the general idea of even starting. Some of it's laziness, some of it's fear, some of it's shit from the past. All excuses I know. But I wonder if there's ever a point with people based of life experience or general mental being where the idea of having the ability to change your life is itself a hurdle. I know I've seen it with some people who lack such basic discipline and willpower that they literally... can't. I'm not sure if I'm there yet but I think the problem I see with the modern advice for failures in life is maybe some people just lack the ability to start or stick with anything. I'm sure most people understand going to the gym, not jacking off and finding religion are solid pieces of advice that would help. But I wonder if you can teach yourself true discipline, if failures can actually learn to keep themselves on track. Because if you can't manage to will yourself to do the base things you know will improve your life, you're just kind of fucked. That might be an excuse but I wonder if all the loners and untouchables actually are able to make tremendous change.

You're not wrong at all. People should be able to make an effort and it's never too late to at least have the ability to make that effort. But if someone didn't discover jesus, grow up in a stabile environment or who's brain isn't even wired a certain way if I contemplate if it's possible at a certain point. I was looking at the Connor Bible thread and some of the cows on here. And as much as I think I suck, I think of them and I wonder if any of them even CAN change. Of course they can in theory. But if you're someone like THAT, can you?

 

[Secret Messages]

something something best time to plant a tree. there’s no use worrying about how much time you wasted in your life because you don’t get a second chance. Consider the idea that your life has only started at this exact moment.

 

[McMitch]

I'm nearing my 40s, and have reinvented myself a few times. I'm doing it again as we speak. I agree with @McMitch4kf that it's really only too late when you're dead, though I'd add the more things you've broken, physically or mentally, the harder it becomes. I thank god I never got into drugs, stayed fat for more than a few years, or had a record that involved more than a couple speeding tickets. It's never "too late" to change yourself overall, however the longer you go, and the worse decisions you made/continue to make will close doors and narrow possibilities.

The assumption is usually that the theoretical timeline should come easy. Nothing comes easy. Every goal and challenge one faces in life will inevitably face what seems to be insurmountable odds. It literally happens to everyone. If that’s all it takes to get you to give up, either the end goal wasn’t worth it, or you just didn’t want it enough (wanting something without putting the required effort constitutes not wanting it enough).

 

[Otterly]

You cannot change the past, but you can learn from it. It’s never too late to change some things.
Specific things yes you can miss the boat on. You’re not going to be an Olympic athlete if you don’t train when young. But in terms of just growing up and being more sorted people can change. It take serious willpower and it helps to have a reason. That’s probably why having kids straightens people out.
The rise of the online father figure stuff is because society is broken and we’ve lost those figures in real life.
I know that for me having kids changed me a lot.

 

[Prince Vegeta]

It's never too late. I turn my life about every decade or so.

What I find a bit worrying is that you mention accomplishments a lot. What is it you think you should have accomplished by now to have this magical fulfilled life? What are the standards you're holding yourself to? Are they your own? Do you think it's something you achieve and then you're done? Because life does not work like that, which is something you don't know yet if you're in your 20s but will learn along the way.

Other people already said it better. Figure what you like doing and do that for a bit. Try some things. Think about what you want to do, just you. Your 20s and 30s is so very young. You've got decades ahead to reinvent yourself many times over.

 

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

What is it you think you should have accomplished by now to have this magical fulfilled life? What are the standards you're holding yourself to? Are they your own? Do you think it's something you achieve and then you're done? Because life does not work like that, which is something you don't know yet if you're in your 20s but will learn along the way.

I think it's the fact I haven't done anything. I let opportunities and chances slip by out of fear. On one hand, I should have started writing or trying to work in film but I was afraid of college and the overall political/social landscape of the western artistic mediums and how I could make it in that. I thought writing comics with a more anime/manga influence was dumb because I was a westerner and it would be cringe so they'd never take off. I thought of a million excuses not to do one thing because of the million other things I wanted to do in life so I ultimately did nothing. That eats at me a little.
That would be okay though if I had some of the basic achievements of a lot of human beings. I've had sex and dated and shit, but it's been a while and I see the gap for me to find someone I care about or a decent friend group closing more and more. It doesn't help that I'm in one of the shittiest states in the country and am struggling to get out.

So it's overall a mixture of long term goals I never went after and not meeting the basic requirements of the hierarchy of needs and feeling like I mean nothing to this world. If I had a decent group of people around me OR was doing what I wanted in life, I'd be fine without having the other. But it's this mixture and knowing a chunk of it's my own fault that is leaning more towards being a gay ass doomer.

 

[Matt Damon]

I wonder if I've just missed my chance to live a fulfilling life

I think feeling one's life is "fulfilling" comes down much more to disposition and temperament than it does to tangible achievements or milestones.

 

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

I think feeling one's life is "fulfilling" comes down much more to disposition and temperament than it does to tangible achievements or milestones.

That's very true. That said I do find the idea of the "depressed successful musician/artist" type kind of daft. I understand you can be depressed or uncomfortable despite your accomplishments but I do think a lot of people who are able to a) either do what they do for a living or b) not have to do things they don't want to do sometimes should appreciate where they're at in life.
I know that's not what you're saying but I feel like accomplishment can have a direct affect on someone being able to justify their emotional state.

 

[Pitbull Victim]

I will try not to powerlevel too much because I know this is probably going to deserve some puzzle pieces.
I primarily have creative interests. Drawing/writing. The problem is I and a lot of people were faggots when we were young and wanted to do everything and anything but never put in the time or concentration towards any goal, so in the end nothing was accomplished. Now I look at the majority of people who's works I admire and know how early of a start they got and how much of a work ethic they had and I feel like there's no way to bridge that gap.

Look at it this way, here's how a couple of writers I enjoy started:

James Ellroy was a drunk and petty criminal who later finally found steady work as a golf caddy; he didn't publish his first book until he was 33 and didn't achieve mainstream success until he was nearly 40.

Thomas Harris was a local newspaper reporter who had one fairly successful book under his belt at 35 (Black Sunday) but only really broke out at 41 when Red Dragon was published.

Frank Herbert was in his 40s and living off his wife's salary prior to Dune being published.

It's never too late dude.

 

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

It's never too late dude.

I want to apologize to everyone for coming across as exceptional but it does weigh on me a bit sometimes. Luckily I'm really not doing too bad in life as I have been or some people. But there are people I look at and think it absolutely applies. With some though it may just be a character trait that stops them rather then age. Maybe it's not that you turn 25 and become a failure but you turn 30, are autistic and have such an air of entitlement that you might as well be gone.
I guess I love the movie Sideways because it's to me an accurate portrayal of how someone who probably has nothing to look forward to is and the feeling of malaise going through life letting chances pass you by. But yes, being in your mid 20s' feeling like life is over is probably a little fucking gay, I'll admit.

 

[Agarathium1066]

Life is a neverending series of fights to change from one form to the next. The difficulty of each particular phase of it can vary heavily by the individual or the goal desired. Wanting to be more active, feel less like shit on a daily basis? Very doable, it's gonna be hard and its gonna take a lot of changing of things. Sticking to them even when shit really starts sucking or not letting yourself fall back onto old comforts.

Wanting to be more social? Time to put yourself out there and really come outside of your bubble. Slowly learn and evolve to see what social groups actually now mesh decently with you. Find people who you may not always agree with but largely can find some fulfillment in being around them.

Wanting a change to a job or your financial situation can be tough and heavily reliant on seeing the opportunities that may be ahead of you. Though even then you can't always be sure it will properly fulfilling or successful for a long time.

So long as you can keep getting up to try again, to see another day, its not too late to see changes.

 

[TheDarknessGrows]

The sooner the better. But you'll always have time until you die.

Be prepared! Some of us get to do it multiple times while some have boring lives and never really have to do it the first time.

 

[AIKA]

Most people don't have it figured out by the time they have reached their 30s, much less early 20s.

Worrying about your future is normal and healthy, just make sure to not fall into a never-ending loop of "I'm too late".

Set a goal and work towards it.

Without PLing, I have changed fields three times in my life and I expect to do it a forth time. This is despite having degrees in those areas, qualifications and shit.

Just keep moving forward, learning from your mistakes. And never let go of that spark we all have when starting something new. Ask questions, learn from older, more experienced people.

Good luck. We are all gonna make it, brah.

 

[I'm Retarded?]

I think it's the fact I haven't done anything. I let opportunities and chances slip by out of fear. On one hand, I should have started writing or trying to work in film but I was afraid of college and the overall political/social landscape of the western artistic mediums and how I could make it in that. I thought writing comics with a more anime/manga influence was dumb because I was a westerner and it would be cringe so they'd never take off. I thought of a million excuses not to do one thing because of the million other things I wanted to do in life so I ultimately did nothing. That eats at me a little.
That would be okay though if I had some of the basic achievements of a lot of human beings. I've had sex and dated and shit, but it's been a while and I see the gap for me to find someone I care about or a decent friend group closing more and more. It doesn't help that I'm in one of the shittiest states in the country and am struggling to get out.

So it's overall a mixture of long term goals I never went after and not meeting the basic requirements of the hierarchy of needs and feeling like I mean nothing to this world. If I had a decent group of people around me OR was doing what I wanted in life, I'd be fine without having the other. But it's this mixture and knowing a chunk of it's my own fault that is leaning more towards being a gay ass doomer.

bro everyone with a worthwhile brain spends most of their life being unsure what they even want. let go of the idea that your life path is something that needs to be completely planned and started on today. if you have goals now, work towards them. they'll probably change. you may climb the mountain only to find out that the view from the top isn't what you wanted. you may find that you're far more comfortable in the foothills. you won't know until you try, experience some shit, and figure out how you feel about it. stay fluid with your expectations. let go of the fear of being unfulfilled. none of this shit matters after you're dead so just find a direction to go in, see what happens, worry less about the destination and just enjoy the journey.

I think about this comic a lot.