Why does my husband hover when I'm fixing things?

parsnip

parsnip

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 24, 2024
Whenever something in the house breaks, I'm the one who fixes it. I've replaced sink pipes, fixed the dishwasher etc. So far I haven't destroyed anything.
Tonight the washer is broke so I started working on it, but my husband hovers over me and second guesses everything I'm doing until I just get up and leave.

Do I hit him? Give him a flashlight to hold? I told him I sure could use a sandwich but he didn't take the hint.
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
  • Autistic
  • Feels
Reactions: TroonsDid911, Finger Pistols, eatler and 2 others
Sort by date Sort by votes
But why doesn't he fix it? Does he complain about it? Have you considered just letting him fix the things?

If this is actually happening he's probably feeling a little weird about not doing it himself and you should try partaking in the tradition of pretending to be helpless sometimes so your husband can come to the rescue and feel nice.

Try just letting him do some of the handyman work and find something else to do instead of being in overbearing mom mode where you've immediately got to jump on every single thing that goes wrong while he stands by feeling useless and emasculated.

(on the other hand if he refuses to do it but keeps second guessing you then tell him to either do it himself or be quiet)
 
  • Optimistic
Reactions: eatler
Upvote 1 Downvote
I can't stand when homeowners hover and watch me work but then I remember sometimes they're curious about what I'm doing so I'll explain it to them in very simple ways a child would understand and they usually get the hint and fuck off.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Finger Pistols and eatler
Upvote 0 Downvote
Ultrapenguin said:
But why doesn't he fix it? Does he complain about it? Have you considered just letting him fix the things?

If this is actually happening he's probably feeling a little weird about not doing it himself and you should try partaking in the tradition of pretending to be helpless sometimes so your husband can come to the rescue and feel nice.

Try just letting him do some of the handyman work and find something else to do instead of being in overbearing mom mode where you've immediately got to jump on every single thing that goes wrong while he stands by feeling useless and emasculated.

(on the other hand if he refuses to do it but keeps second guessing you then tell him to either do it himself or be quiet)
Click to expand...
The reason I do it is because he's immediately overwhelmed when anything breaks and just doesn't do anything, which is fine because I'm pretty good at that stuff and I don't get stressed out. I just don't understand the hovering when he knows I'll deal with it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: eatler
Upvote 0 Downvote
Grub said:
I can't stand when homeowners hover and watch me work but then I remember sometimes they're curious about what I'm doing so I'll explain it to them in very simple ways a child would understand and they usually get the hint and fuck off.
Click to expand...
I really just enjoy learning new things, like what all the parts are and how they work together, so I can have a better idea of what precisely is broken in the future. I'm not naturally mechanically inclined. If it's that annoying, I'll stop, already.
 
  • Feels
  • Like
Reactions: Prokhor Zakharov, Finger Pistols, SandyCat and 2 others
Upvote 0 Downvote
Grub said:
I can't stand when homeowners hover and watch me work but then I remember sometimes they're curious about what I'm doing so I'll explain it to them in very simple ways a child would understand and they usually get the hint and fuck off.
Click to expand...
When we had our floors replaced I left for the day and told the workers to call when they were done. I always figured it's easier to get a job done when you don't have someone all up in your shit.
 
  • Like
Reactions: eatler
Upvote 0 Downvote
Hamstirer said:
I assume because he has to go back and fix it right afterwards and wants to see how you are fucking it up.
Click to expand...
It's this.
My wife electrocuted herself one time, trying to fix something. I laughed and called her a stupid bitch. Then she told the electricians at her workplace about it - God knows why - and they laughed at her too.
She still brings that up, 20 years later.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: TroonsDid911, SandyCat, eatler and 2 others
Upvote 0 Downvote
Iron Jaguar said:
It's this.
My wife electrocuted herself one time, trying to fix something. I laughed and called her a stupid bitch. Then she told the electricians at her workplace about it - God knows why - and they laughed at her too.
She still brings that up, 20 years later.
Click to expand...
He's never had to re-fix anything. I'm sorry you married a dumb bitch though
 
  • Like
  • DRINK!
Reactions: Prokhor Zakharov, eatler and Iron Jaguar
Upvote 0 Downvote
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back