You are now a redditor

[Soycast Guy]

You are fat, stinky, wear a fedora, grew out your neckbeard, and have severe acne. You are doomed to post to reddit every day for the rest of your life. What do you do?

 

[Doji]

 

[Megaroad 2012]

It's ma'am, asshole

 

[Pony! Hugger of People]

I spend all my time talking about how terrible and racist America is but then as soon as anyone else criticises America or acknowledges that American culture isn't universal I have an absolute coniption and report everything they've ever posted

I screech at people about respecting my lived experience, but refuse to evan acknowledge the thought that perhaps maybe there's a chance other people's lived experiences are different than mine or that they even have them.

I never leave my house and base all my opinions on stereotypes from Reddit, these opinions must be taken as fact without question.

Despite never having left my state, I am expert on Scandinavian socialism and communism and take every opportunity to tell people how great it is and how previous iterations wasn't real socialism/communism

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Yikes! Let's unpack this.

 

[Tism the Return]

Hey fam ORANGE MAN BAD????????

 

[Wintersun]

Say the nigger word, get banned, never be allowed to post on Reddit again, practice hygiene and get fit and styled. Problem solved.

 

[PipTheAlchemist]

But I'm skinny, smell nice, I don't wear a fedora (or any hats, for that matter. I want to show-off my lucious shiny blond hair), clean-shaven (I ain't no chinlet. I don't need a soyboy beard) and clear-skinned

 

[Skitarii]

Thank null for the kiwigold kind stranger

 

[Officer Eradicate]

kill myself

 

[King Fructose]

I quagmire toilet

 

[Sicklick]

Southern Independence העצמאות הדרומית Jews did 9/11 התרסקות מטוס מזויף בשנת Ruby Ridge ג'ונס אלכס African American Crime Statistics מחאת הקפיטול Great Reset כינויים / הוא / אותו Zionist Occupation Government לובי white genocide רצח עם לבן free speech ערכת שתי מפלגות Waco Massacre דין וחשבון פוליטי Blue State Texas חופש ביטוי Capitol Hill Protesters Beaten To Death in Jail איפוס נהדר - ממשלת כיבוש ציוני Electoral Fraud of 2020 רובי רידג '- העסקה החדשה Fired for Smirking כינויים / הוא / אותו Vicki Weaver Ashli Babbitt Kelly Thomas Justine Damond Daniel Shaver הפרדה The Great Replacement זיוף אלקטורל AIPAC Control of Congress מפרץ גואנטנמו It’s Okay to be White האנטר ביידן מה לעזאזל אמרת פשוט עליי, כלבה קטנה? אני אדע לך שסיימתי את מחזור הכיתות שלי בחותמות הצי, והייתי מעורב במספר פשיטות סודיות על אל-קוועידה, ויש לי למעלה מ הרוגים מאושרים אני מאומן בלוחמת גורילות ואני הצלף המוביל בכל הכוחות המזוינים של ארה"ב. אתה לא בשבילי אלא סתם עוד מטרה. אני אמחה אתכם לעזאזל בדייקנות שכמותה לא נראתה מעולם על כדור הארץ הזה, סמנו את דברי המזוינים Hitler Did Nothing Wrong

 

[Friendly Mudcrab]

What do you do?

You go back.

 

[axfaxf]

41 % obv.

 

[Smug Chuckler]

r/suicidewatch

 

[Open Window Maniac]

Say transwomen are men, and also groomers. That way I'd get banned so hard, the url wouldn't even load on any computer I ever use.

 

[Cheerlead-in-Chief]

So I post autistic theories about Shonen anime in between lurking r/nosleep, upvoting whatever post I like, saving gifs onto my PC and if a Mod ban any mention of Null/Kiwi Farms?

I'll draw my Redditsona.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

BRB, dialating.

 

[A Gay Retard]

I refuse to work and masturbate incessantly capitalism has surely failed

 

[Table Country]

The Last Jedi is a good film.