You stand accused of unfunny shitpost. How do you plead?

[Larkin N Likin]

 

[Vingle]

Shit myself and do nothing. Hoping everyone will laugh and forget my crime.

 

[DerKryptid]

 

[Bob Page]

 

[NekoRightsActivist]

Mock him back for being a gigantic faggot who cares about posting quality on fucking kiwifarms lol.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

Calm down lol

 

[Jason Wynn]

Sneed

 

[LDARbeforeROPE]

 

[Mr Bunny]

Calm down lol

Calm, lol, down.

 

[Weeb Slinger]

I know that I'm going down for a long time. Even if the forensic data were to be destroyed in a mysterious evidence storage room fire, the multiple eye-witness statements and CCTV footage are enough to convict me.

You know, the funny thing is that, on some level, I wanted to get caught. I wanted somebody to stop me. I would actually write funny shitposts and then imagine what they would be like if the alleged comedienne, Leslie Jones, had written them. Then I would rewrite the shitposts in capitalised Ebonics and suddenly they would be on the level of some school kid, who mistakes volume for humour, attempting to disrupt a class through their incessant buffoonery.

I will come quietly.

 

[Least Concern]

I plead guilty and am willing to accept my sentence of many unpleasant stickers.

 

[SneedEyeMitch]

You assblasted motherfucker, look at you judging me, judging Xi, may a troon turn your dick into their personal dilator.

 

[CAPTAIN HAPPY]

Not my problem that your sense of humor sucks to understand my hilarious quad digit IQ meta posts.

 

[DiggieSmalls]

My shitposts aren’t meant to be funny.

 

[Positron]

I don't exist for your entertainment.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

With the Navy Seal copypasta.

 

[Larkin N Likin]

Sneed

Sneed's feed and plead (formerly Chuck's) won't work in this court room.

 

[NoonmanR]

Guilty your honor, unfunny shitposts are the bread and butter of this business, and i wouldn't change it, not for you or A N Y O N E E L S E.

 

[Picnic_Boy]

Double down and shit my pants twice as hard next time.

 

[Creep3r]

Sneed's seed and plead won't work in this court room.

Overruled! The assembly has chosen to impeach you on account of bias and/or prejudice towards rural feed farmers and for judging-under-the-influence. Per the assembly, this trial will now be oversneed by the honorable Judge Albert Sneed! @Autumnal Equinox please continue your sneedstimony.