Your Ethos - What makes you live your life the way you do?

[Pargon]

I've been thinking recently about why and how I act the way I do. Here's my basic foundation, and I'd be really interested in seeing the other posters' here, and their justification for it.

Respect the people who do things for you. Mainly I'm talking about the people in wage jobs who do things other people pay for. Servers, cashiers, people who answer phones and people who push paperwork. Say please and thank you to them. Call them sir and ma'am, and not just when you want to get your way. Show patience. Explain clearly what you need from them. Have information ready that they'll need and don't get pissed at them if you don't and have to come back. These people deal with an hundred people like you every day, and when they fuck up it could just as likely be because they're tired and they made an honest mistake and not because they don't give a shit or they're being passive aggressive because they don't think they're getting paid enough (which is very likely the case anyway). Give them the benefit of the doubt. Express some humility on your end. They serve people all day long, and whether they're doing it because they have to or because they're good at it, that takes a certain kind of person.

They said, if they suck, do what you need to do and walk.

Oh, and tip if it's typically done in the circumstance. Fuck you and your Mr. Pink shit.

Do what you say you're going to do. AKA show some integrity. Nobody likes a liar, and doubly so when they're depending on you to follow through and you don't. Pay a bet when you lose, be on time, and follow through. Manage expectations. People will care more when you let them know ahead of time that you won't be able to make good than when you make them find out on their own at the eleventh hour.

A good night's sleep fixes more than you might think. Even if you have to force it, do it. Even an extra hour or two does wonders for body and mind. Ambien and barricade yourself in your room. There are very few people who can get by on five hours or less day after day. After a week of that, seven hours is like hitting the reset button on your brain. Now imagine if you set time aside to do that every night.

 

[The Sauce Boss]

I kinda made a list of things that I live by.

Be real. There's a difference between being just 'truthful' or 'honest' and being real. Honest people tell lies sometimes. Truthful people might 'omit the truth' to protect somebody. That's not who I am. If I think you need to hear something, you're gonna hear it. If you don't like it, sorry, but I'm putting it out there.

Be genuine. You ain't never gonna find me pretending to be someone I'm not. It's hard enough just being me, imagine all the effort I'd have to put in to make a fake fucking persona.

Be humble. Things have a way of going your way if you're humble. I used to think this was a load of shit, but when I stopped walking around like my shit didn't stink and started being a reasonable human being, I found that people respected me more, even when they disagreed with me or didn't like something I said or did, because they knew it was coming from a genuine place instead of some shitty desire to be the one swinging the biggest dick around.

Treat People Right. It's self-explanatory, but I'll divide it further into two parts.

Be generous to those who deserve it. If I see a man who's down on his luck, trying his damn hardest to get by, and hitting walls that are out of his control, I'll pay for his lunch. If my buddy's got a job interview but it's across the DFW area and he can't afford a train ticket right now, I'll pay his fare, or better yet, I'll drive him out there and we can get a bite and shoot the shit. If I see somebody who's done a good turn for me struggling, I'll try my best to push them along the right path. The more kindness you show, in most cases, the more you get back. Don't enable people, but be willing to lift them up if they truly need the help.

Be strict with those who deserve it. Opposite of the above. Don't let any nigga take you for a ride. Your 'friend' is a bum who blows all his money on hoes and cheap shit? Don't lend him that twenty dollars, you know where it's going. Your roommate's late on rent for the fifth time in the past six months and they're begging you for money again? Is it really your problem? If people are trying to leech off you, do what you have to do, and with authority.

Remember where you came from. I'm from the boondocks of Louisiana. I hate it there. I will only go there for weddings, childbirths, and funerals now. There ain't nothing in that shithole that's worth staying around for, but I learned valuable lessons from the deepest south. I learned that you gotta fight for what you think is right sometimes, and that you can't let people walk over you. I learned that there's still hope even when you're flat on your back on a street corner in the pouring rain, with nothing but a poncho to protect you from the bone fucking cold. Everything you do in this life, every major event, will give you a lesson. Learn it.

Remember that you're only one human being. Don't wear yourself to the bone in pursuit of 'the perfect life.' You're probably not gonna get a house in the Hills with a trophy wife, three kids and a lambo. Find the simple things, the things that bring you joy, and work to them. This is probably the biggest part of my life philosophy, right here:

Make your own damn satisfaction. Don't let anyone tell you how to live your life. If it brings you joy and it keeps you going, then do it, so long as you aren't fucking it up for anyone else.

 

[Papa Adolfo's Take'n'Bake]

Learn from the mistakes of others first:
Not necessarily maliciously, but people who have fucked up big time can teach you a lot. Listen to them, help where you can, and know exploitation versus assistance. There is ever more to learn. It costs nothing to be understanding, it costs everything to shut up and just arbitrarily believe.

 

[ColtWalker1847]

Keep your promises. Similar to "Do what you say..." But more so. Even if you are sick and dying or whatever, get your ass there and do what you said you would do. You find you had more in the tank than you thought. If you let excuses creep in that will become all you do. A promise that you had an excuse to get out of is still a broken promise.

Make and keep a routine. Work hard to keep the schedule. Lazy days make for a disorganized life. If things aren't working out, like you are getting fat or something, change it up to address the problem.

Work the problem, don't be the problem. If your plan for "doing something" is just talking and not materially contributing and/or obstructing work. You aren't helping. Put yourself in a position to contribute or butt out.

"Helping" isn't always helping. Sometimes working towards someone else's goals is a fool's errand. Especially if they are desperate. Usually that is for a very good reason. Sometimes you gotta let them fall down. Try to put yourself in a position to pick them back up.

Don't become wed to your dreams. Just because you dreamt it doesn't mean it is destined to happen. Or should happen. Holding on to them has a cost as hanging on causes you to turn down other better opportunities. Chase them, don't marry them.

Take every opportunity learn something about yourself. Introspection is key in knowing how to interact with the world. Learn from mistakes. Learn from success. Figure out what you did and how it could be better.

 

[DDBCAE CBAADCBE]

I personally think something like this is just oversimplifying a concept that is often very complex. When you're able to put your ego aside you'll realize that no one can uphold their own standards all the time. We've all hurt people, we've all been hurt by someone, and it will most likely happen again because we as humans are perfectly imperfect. We are walking contradictions in a world with no meaning. We cling to lies and hope even when we think we're being as honest with ourselves as we can be. Sometimes I wish I was still naive enough to have something to believe in, maybe a life after death or anything really. I love the world and the people of this world more than anything, I love joy and sadness, all of it. I don't want to lose that. It's all I have and all I care about anymore. The day I die all of that is going to disappear as though it never happened. I won't even have the memories or the capacity to even comprehend what I've lost and that's terrifying. I feel like in a way life has been a curse for me. I get to see all this amazing stuff but with the caveat that no matter what I do, no matter how nice I am or how hard I work I'll lose it all forever eventually. I know I'm rambling and I'm sure it's annoying but it's the only way I really know how to express this.

To answer your question this is why I can't sleep and end up going to work sleep deprived and feeling guilty all the time, and ultimately why I try not to second guess myself anymore and just own my mistakes when I make them consequences be damned. I only have this one life so I want to live it with integrity. I'll do what's right even if it hurts me and even if the right thing isn't the smartest thing. That's how I think a man should live, with pride and passion.

 

[soft kitty]

Never cruel nor cowardly. Never give up, never give in. And if you ever are, always make amends.

 

[Marco Fucko]

This thread is gay lol

 

[Demon King]

I am no where near as profound as some of the other posters here. What keeps me going is the desire to see what happens. That is about it. I am pretty cynical, but I am not a pessimist. I want to make the world a better place, but I realize that impossibility. So I am stuck in a bit of a limbo, between selfish desire, destruction, and being the goodguy.

 

[Icasaracht]

I indulge. Nothing else matters.

 

[SofondaCox]

If you haven't lost everything yet - it's coming. Memento mori.

Steal time. Everything else is replaceable.

 

[Spunt]

Show up on time. Being avoidably late means that you consider your time more important than other people's. Considering that all of us only have 24 hours in a day, and we are all mortal, wasting someone's time is a profoundly narcissistic insult on a really existential level.

Have fun. Again, we are mortal and only have so many hours on the planet. Don't be on your deathbed and think "well I certainly worked a lot of unpaid overtime". Fill your life with as many good memories as you can, money is nothing if you can't enjoy its fruits.

Make a mark. When someone dies, it is remarkable how quickly their lives fade from view. You can have all the ideas in the world, be passionate about your beliefs, have the wildest imagination, but if you don't write that shit down, it all dies with you. Make something, express yourself, change the world in whatever way you want to change it. But fucking do something (posting on Twitter doesn't count).

Don't tell lies. Not because it is immoral necessarily, but because lying to people about anything remotely important will make your life hell. You will need to spin more and more lies to make your first lie plausible until you have literal diagrams of what you have said to who. You're not as smart as you think you are and you will get found out eventually, and you will have to not only face the consequences of lying to multiple people for very long periods, but also the consequences of people finding out whatever it was you lied to cover up in the first place. It is never worth it. If you fuck up, come clean and move on.

Get a pet. More advice than ethos really. I recommend cats personally, but whatever your animal of choice, get one, even if you have to make lifestyle changes to make it possible. Having something that depends on you will stabilise your mental health, keep you in a routine, and provide love and companionship whenever you need it.

 

[Billy "the Bot" Bobson]

Acta non Verba, Ecce quam Videri.
You have no control over what happens at any given time in any given situation, just a loose control of the marginal power allotted to you in your life. A marginal difference can still make a change, but never lose sight at what you can really do.
Lies cost more than the truth, Time is precious yet is often wasted.
You are above no man. Whatever his situation, his beliefs, his actions may be, you may just as well end up as him, for better or for worse.
Virtue is not perfection, but the attaining of perfection. Sin is not flaw, but the attaining of flaws.

 

[soft kitty]

I have a revised ethos that I believe suits me well.

Fear no bitch. Never take shit, always fight back. Follow your dreams. Never cruel nor cowardly, and if you ever are, always make amends. Give me liberty or give me death. Always respect your betters, always kind and honest to friends and family.

 

[JohnDoe]

Every problem can be solved with a large knife, properly applied.
If at first you fail, find a bigger knife or a more appropriate place to apply it.