Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

Peep them dark elbows.

 

[NoReturn]

lol - https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowb...-cools-ice-lolly-enjoying-day-Disneyland.html

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sensible Bowie instinctually hiding out of shame

I just assumed the Daily Mail team felt bad enough for him to hide his identity.

I thought that was a boil

also… why even go to a huge ass theme park like Disney, where she can’t even fit on the rides, with shorts so short on her that she will definitely suffer thigh rub. We all know she has to take the trolley around the park.

As we've seen in the Consoomerism thread, it's about presenting yourself as a "Disney Person" more than actually enjoying the parks.

 

[DoorPost101]

All the atypical anorexia bullshit. And her dumb and miserable expression. We need that here, preferably full-size:
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My knees almost went out just looking at this picture. You ever stand up, twist to go in a different direction and you're not paying attention, and take a step without fully outstretching your leg, and feel your kneecap wobble? That's what walking every day must feel like for her. She's walking forward but her knees are bent backwards.

 

[ConSluttant]

With transportation, boarding, food, ticket price for parents and kids, and overpriced merch, it’s $1000 a day, that’s a reliable number. Tess lives to vacation though so small price to pay

Tess lives in SoCal. She probably has year passes at the local folk rate. Cheaper than Two tickets so it pays for itself the first weekend. Disney wants locals to come or else they would die, especially now.

 

[Oscar Winner]

Spoilered again to save space...

Spoiler: More of my mostly dumb shit

Yes, she's trying her power stance to look thin because she can't layg pop any more

This made me realise what it was that looked so awkward in the photo shoot. Her photos look really tense, like it's hard for her to stand. Aside from everything else already discussed, look at her hand on the car. It's tense AF, like she's really grabbing on, not casually leaning on the car.

Same with this one. She's no good in heels any more, and here she is balancing on basically one foot. Again, her whole body, especially her left leg looks tense. Added bonus for orange tan on the back of her right knee, and at belly level, it's not shadow, it's gunt. (and check out her elbow... lol)

The arrow is her elbow. The rest is fat.

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I've had an absolutely non-sexual fascination with her elbows for ages. I always look for them, and always have the same OMG response. I'm glad it's not just me lol. I couldn't stop looking at this photo too, she's just so big! Candid shots really are so telling of how much is shopped/filtered + no allowance for flattering angles. The neck hump, back fat, and is that waist or arse?

I was trying to work out what was going on with her shorts, or DM article said skirt... I think it's being eaten by her overhang and is hiking up when she walks. Also, I hope it's a trick of the light, but zoom in on the red circle at your own peril.

Aannnd last but not least.

SHE HAS A GIANT SIDE PROFILE OF A FACE STUFFED DOWN HER PANTS!

Edit for words and spelling

 

[Angry New Ager]

Tess lives in SoCal. She probably has year passes at the local folk rate. Cheaper than Two tickets so it pays for itself the first weekend. Disney wants locals to come or else they would die, especially now.

That's what I thought, given that she lives so close to Disneyland, and one of the people who spotted her tagged the location as Disneyland. Also, she refers to it as "my favorite place," which I would assume means Disneyland because she's been there so much before (I don't even know if she's been to WDW, and she can't afford it anyway).

But the Daily Fail article says that she wasn't at Disneyland (in Anaheim, which isn't far from Long Beach), but rather at Walt Disney World, which is in (hot, sticky, humid, miserable-for-fatties) Florida.

This time, I assume the Daily Fail got it wrong, as Englandistanis are more likely to go to Florida and WDW. Perhaps whoever wrote the article got these pics late in the day and needed to get this clickbaity shit cranked out so they could leave off and go drown their sorrow at working for such a shitty rag in lots of booze—so they didn't make sure they got the right park.

 

[America's Giggling Gigolo]

The dailymail has delivered once again. That shot of Tess standing there like a behemoth, face full of pain from carrying around her morbid girth, is a new classic.

 

[Rotogravure]

That's what I thought, given that she lives so close to Disneyland, and one of the people who spotted her tagged the location as Disneyland. Also, she refers to it as "my favorite place," which I would assume means Disneyland because she's been there so much before (I don't even know if she's been to WDW, and she can't afford it anyway).

But the Daily Fail article says that she wasn't at Disneyland (in Anaheim, which isn't far from Long Beach), but rather at Walt Disney World, which is in (hot, sticky, humid, miserable-for-fatties) Florida.

This time, I assume the Daily Fail got it wrong, as Englandistanis are more likely to go to Florida and WDW. Perhaps whoever wrote the article got these pics late in the day and needed to get this clickbaity shit cranked out so they could leave off and go drown their sorrow at working for such a shitty rag in lots of booze—so they didn't make sure they got the right park.

They consistently spelled Florida as FLORDIA so I would say that they don't have the correct Disney property.

 

[Angry New Ager]

They consistently spelled Florida as FLORDIA so I would say that they don't have the correct Disney property.

Or maybe the Daily Fail's flunky, wondering how their life and smbitions ended up reduced to churning out clickbait about a woman whose sole claim to fame is her monstrous fatness, started drinking early.

 

[Constellationzero]

When the pachyderm of Fort Gay, Simply Sara has more shapely, toned, and svelte layyyyygs than Ryann Hooves...

About 5:00 in, you'll see not only this, but look at Sara's feet. They are FLAT. I mean--FLAT FLAT--like South Dakota Prairie FLAT. But it's really quite a feat that Ryann's layyyygs with their shin fupas (shupas) are nastier than Sara's.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Those arms! Those arms! They are bigger than her calves!
Still 300 lbs though, eh?

Her arms always throw me off, because my eyes say she's wearing leg o'mutton sleeves.
But then my brain says wait, she has the fattest upper arms I've ever seen.
Even in the black mesh top, I think that's an interesting sleeve sty...wait, those are her damn arms?!

 

[bloomingcactus]

I've had an absolutely non-sexual fascination with her elbows for ages. I always look for them, and always have the same OMG response. I'm glad it's not just me lol. I couldn't stop looking at this photo too, she's just so big! Candid shots really are so telling of how much is shopped/filtered + no allowance for flattering angles. The neck hump, back fat, and is that waist or arse?

I always thought her arms were odd. The fat distribution. It's like someone put a tourniquet at her wrist and right below her elbow. When she puts her arm straight down the fat from her upper arm sags over her lower arm. Her tattoos on her right arm (the one with Ms Piggy) that end in a dark circle really exaggerate the effect.

 

[Gay Mouth]

Her arms must be so heavy, but it’s all concentrated on the upper part, which she doesn’t have to consciously ‘lift’. She’s like one of those pigs that get so fat they can’t move or blink.

 

[Oscar Winner]

Her arms must be so heavy, but it’s all concentrated on the upper part, which she doesn’t have to consciously ‘lift’. She’s like one of those pigs that get so fat they can’t move or blink.

That pig makes me sad, poor thing. I didn't know that was something that happened.

Back to Tess, I know I've shared this before, but just look at it. Such odd proportions, as if the different parts of her arm don't go together. The bigger she gets, the stranger things look. Like the inside of her forearms are getting their own strange fat deposit, and it's been pointed out previously that she looks like an amputee when she kneels now that her legs are getting so big.

I'd have empathy for someone with BED or something medical, but Tess is just so awful in every possible way, and has noone to blame but herself.

 

[Snack Cracker]

That pig makes me sad, poor thing. I didn't know that was something that happened.

Back to Tess, I know I've shared this before, but just look at it. Such odd proportions, as if the different parts of her arm don't go together. The bigger she gets, the stranger things look. Like the inside of her forearms are getting their own strange fat deposit, and it's been pointed out previously that she looks like an amputee when she kneels now that her legs are getting so big.
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I'd have empathy for someone with BED or something medical, but Tess is just so awful in every possible way, and has noone to blame but herself.

Honestly I do think she has binge eating disorder, but any sympathy she would get for that evaporated when she publicly announced herself as anorexic.
Any ana that sees her would probably use her as reverse thinspo because good goddamn.
Even with an eating disorder (not anorexia nervosa), she’s still the one responsible for her recovery/not dying at 40 because her heart is suffocated in fat.

 

[Gay Mouth]

Binges are defined as periods of excessive eating, right? I think Tess is a grazer. She defines her ‘AnOrExIa’ as “I would go all day without eating (((ignore the Starbucks and candy))) anything and would eat one meal at 9pm before bed”

but clearly we’ve seen she grazes on candy all day

 

[Smiling Honeybadger]

That pig makes me sad, poor thing. I didn't know that was something that happened.

Back to Tess, I know I've shared this before, but just look at it. Such odd proportions, as if the different parts of her arm don't go together. The bigger she gets, the stranger things look. Like the inside of her forearms are getting their own strange fat deposit, and it's been pointed out previously that she looks like an amputee when she kneels now that her legs are getting so big.
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I'd have empathy for someone with BED or something medical, but Tess is just so awful in every possible way, and has noone to blame but herself.

My oops moment was when I confused the black gymnastics ball in the background with Tess' butt. The mortifying part was that I didn't feel it distorted her in any way at first sight.

I believe we can agree that you don't get to this size by having maybe not the best diet in the World, but by having a severely disordered eating problem. If it is a general food addiction or binge eating is not so important. But we can agree that it is not anorexia. Not even the atypical variety. Tess is simply the very stereotype of the greedy, self-absorbed white trash bitch that loves to consume. Her Disneyland photo with the trashy Minnie Mouse ears is simply a perfect illustration. Maybe a huge ass turkey Leg was missing, but other than that, Tess would be a great model for every nasty American stereotype there is.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

That pig makes me sad, poor thing. I didn't know that was something that happened.

Back to Tess, I know I've shared this before, but just look at it. Such odd proportions, as if the different parts of her arm don't go together. The bigger she gets, the stranger things look. Like the inside of her forearms are getting their own strange fat deposit, and it's been pointed out previously that she looks like an amputee when she kneels now that her legs are getting so big.
View attachment 2568038

I'd have empathy for someone with BED or something medical, but Tess is just so awful in every possible way, and has noone to blame but herself.

This is one example of why her "supermodel" career is over, and why there's not many clothing options for death fats out there.
How do you design and manufacture for all the different deathfat body types out there? You can't.
Yes, you can make jeans for Tess that will fit her, but making a blouse with sleeves that will cover her arms? No, she needs custom work.
Another example that's always haunted me is a client on M600PL, Charity. Her arms weren't huge like Tess's, but she had these huge weird wings of fat growing off of her hips from being bedbound so long. No way to make clothes to fit her, either.

 

[Flawmil]

Forgot to screenshot it yesterday and now it’s deleted. Tess reposted the daily mail photos asking why they always have to take the worst photos of her, can’t she just hang out with her family in peace!!! Lol acting like she was Kylie Jenner getting papped all the time.

 

[Dawn Davenport]

Two days ago I saw Tess at Disneyland myself. At the time I was thinking how pleasant the weather and humidity was in CA as compared to my native subtropics, and then I noticed her. A very large woman with a very sweaty upper lip and a grimace of pain waddled past me and indeed it was Tess.
The crowd pushed us in opposite directions so I couldn’t get a picture but Tess was happy to share some herself. Note how pink and miserable she looks in this photo and keep that in mind next time you see her posed Disney pics or her activewear shilling.