Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 197 14.1%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 793 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,393
Yeah, but to be all about safety behind the wheel you have to be able to get behind the wheel to begin with. 🤣 🤣 🤣
Yeah Jack would be too busy scarfing down food to drive. It's honestly good Mushbrain is not driving because he'd probably crash the car while shoving chicken wings down his throat.
 
He already did that.
Yeah, like he's never repeated himself on his show. I mean there's about 50 chili recipes, a bunch of seasoning videos, re-uploads of old episodes, going back to basics because they were his bread and butter for a while, etc.

And with his stroke-brain it'll all be new again.

of course jack can't understand the concept of moderation. when it comes to food, addicts like jack only know how to stuff themselves into oblivion

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the way he interacts with people on FB never fails to crack me up

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Such a little bitch. I'm amazed that Big T hasn't tried to kill him in his sleep.

"they can't make fun of me anymore if i just reupload old videos that they've already talked about"
Oh Mushbrain, there's a lot of stuff out there on you. I think PC&TLM will have enough ammunition for a long time.

Man he really has declined mentally then if he thinks carbs are fine, or he is lying and trying to make sugar look worse.
Like he knows sugars are carbs. This is the guy that thinks Peru is in the Middle East and that the sign of a good restaurant is pictures in the menu.
 
Yeah Jack would be too busy scarfing down food to drive. It's honestly good Mushbrain is not driving because he'd probably crash the car while shoving chicken wings down his throat.
Could you imagine how much fatter he'd be if he could drive to the store and just buy a pound of bacon for a snack whenever he wants?
 
Could you imagine how much fatter he'd be if he could drive to the store and just buy a pound of bacon for a snack whenever he wants?
Doing a quick Google search, a few grocery stores in Hendersonville do delivery, including Walmart. Jack not having bacon on demand is probably because Big T took away his card privileges. God knows what stupid shit he'd nickel and dime her for if she already let him turn the garage into a gadget graveyard.
 
I think I've mentioned this before, but his mental decline is like the dog handler in the first Resident Evil game.

May 19, 1998
Fever gone but itchy. Hungry and eat doggy food. Itchy itchy Scott came. Ugly face so killed him. Tasty.

4
Itchy.
Tasty.
Umbrella declares SCALFANI VIRUS "Too evil, even for us. Also, stupid zombies make for bad weapons."
 

What years were his strokes? I thought the two were both in Tennessee?

This video is 10 years old and he says he's doing better since his stroke.

Has he had 3?
 
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We talk about the third a lot, but aside from some possible micro-strokes during videos, he hasn't angered God sufficiently.

Considering some of the near tantrums lately, it may come sooner than later. He's like a pug. Pugs are unhealthy creatures.

I imagine it will happen on a walmart trip where he goes for another "oops" double, and Tammy puts the shit back on the shelf.
 
of course jack can't understand the concept of moderation. when it comes to food, addicts like jack only know how to stuff themselves into oblivion

View attachment 2579198

the way he interacts with people on FB never fails to crack me up

View attachment 2579201
>Implying Jack has ever in his life applied only 2 Tbsp of a condiment. (Real Tablespoons of course. Not the large serving spoon he actually uses to shovel on sour cream etc.)
 

What years were his strokes? I thought the two were both in Tennessee?

This video is 10 years old and he says he's doing better since his stroke.

Has he had 3?
So...lore-wise, he had his first stroke on the way to a Las Vegas trip. He attributes the stroke to him drinking Red Bulls, saying that the guarana and taurine combination was what caused it, and not his wildly unhealthy eating habits and tendency to slam down cans of energy drinks regularly.

BTW: Scientists confirmed that it was the excessive caffeine content as well as co-morbitities like high blood pressure (of which Jack does have) that leads to strokes.

Jack also says he drinks Bangs now because they're "sugar free", but fails to understand that they contain nearly 3x the caffeine of a regular Red Bull...tick tock, Fatty Doo Doo.
 
So...lore-wise, he had his first stroke on the way to a Las Vegas trip. He attributes the stroke to him drinking Red Bulls, saying that the guarana and taurine combination was what caused it, and not his wildly unhealthy eating habits and tendency to slam down cans of energy drinks regularly.

BTW: Scientists confirmed that it was the excessive caffeine content as well as co-morbitities like high blood pressure (of which Jack does have) that leads to strokes.

Jack also says he drinks Bangs now because they're "sugar free", but fails to understand that they contain nearly 3x the caffeine of a regular Red Bull...tick tock, Fatty Doo Doo.
To CU piggyback off of @captkrisma, Stroke #2 was in 2018 in Tennessee. It happened in between filming this video:

Ironically, while taste testing a caffeine product. Dumbfuck.
 
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There's also a post in his dead blog that predates the first stroke by about 2-3 years. In it, he whines about a trip to the hospital with symptoms that sound *exactly* like a stroke. He refused tests yet still left early in a huff because it was taking doctors too long to diagnose him(because he declined necessary medical testing). I'm convinced this was at minimum a mini stroke if not a full blown stroke.

So I'm relatively convinced he's actually had three strokes. I'm wondering if his whining and refusal of treatment from the first one actually helped cause the following two. That would be hilarious cosmic justice and would be exactly the type of thing that would happen to Jack.
 
To CU piggyback off of @captkrisma, Stroke #2 was in 2018 in Tennessee. It happened in between filming this video:

Ironically, while taste testing a caffeine product. Dumbfuck.
Hahahahah that's the classic vid where he has a stroke the next day after steeping the stupid coffee sock for a cold brew.

His words are all stroked out too: "Now this is how I drink coffee all summer long ... on ice... cold brew... is really big".
 
Fuck this asshole. 10 years ago it's, "I got a wakeup call and I'm not eating bad food too often now".

10 years later he's smashing fast food burgers in his maw and complaining when they're not big enough.
His eating habit is actually quite revealing what a fake Christian he is, because last time I checked gluttony was still one of the 7 deadly sins. Not that I really would expect anyone of him and family or the retarded church members do know much about Christianity to begin with. So far Jack has almost all of the 7 deadly sins covered.
Gluttony (self explanatory),
Greed (as in buying all that worthless kitchen/BBQ stuff, spending thousands on out eating and so on),
Sloth (as in he hasn't done anything useful e.g a real job for over 15 years even his early video were always bare minimum effort),
Wrath (as in choking his son)
Pride (as in his dangerous overconfidence and arrogance)
 
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