Dax Herrera / Dick Masterson / Daxipad / Juju The Cow / Wolfie / The Dick Show (TDS), The Biggest Problem in the Universe (TBPITU) / New Project 2 - Balding least funny contrarian paedophile defender in the universe, "women are fat" jokes virtuoso, e-daddy of Sektards, chaser and cross-species roleplay sodomy enthusiast. Roleplays as a cow named Juju while he gets fucked in the anus by women. Fat.

[Sped Xing]

I heard Dax fucked Lowtax's tranny hooker while Asterios watched.

 

[Instapot]

I heard Dax fucked Lowtax's tranny hooker while Asterios watched.

At this point I think Dax is into trannys because he keeps tweeting about this particular one. Seems like a lot of trans people are pedophiles so he would fit right in.

i remember myspace every teenager did .....wait what? almost 30? Was a senior in high school when ace ventura impressions were still funny? holy shit! This dumb fuck was dying his hair a decade later than every other fucking loser in his area was doing it. which checks out, he was just doing a SoCal version of Dice during his Dr.phil appearance, hell he only just discovered chris chan this year and last year thought talking about being a prom king* was a big W when arguing with someone

*DAE High school usually vote the biggest spergs in as prom king? i know for a fact the two biggest spergs won when we voted. Which checks out, less than 5% of kids bothered doing any of the extracurricular events at our school, i think statistically we probably had more kids selling drugs than worked on homecoming floats.

Dick had a fucked up face as a kid, and he desperately wanted to be cool, I remember listening to an episode where he goes to a school reunion which triggered his memories of wanting to sit with the cool kids, so I could see this being really important to him because it's means all those cool kids voted for him. On a side note I'm glad he has enough self awareness to not have kids because they would be ugly as shit and would probably get picked on just like him. Just imagine growing up in California in the 90's, having a really cool dad that has money, as a little kid I bet dick was really smart compared to other kids too, but despite having all those advantages he couldn't get what he wanted the most, pussy. Which is really pathetic.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I could see this bring really important to him because it's means all those cool kids voted for him.

At my high school we voted for speds on the homecoming and prom courts because we knew that would be the peak of their lives. Even they realized it didn’t mean they were popular or liked, but pitied and laughed at. Of course the Penny never dropped for dipshit Dax.

 

[Arcturus]

At my high school we voted for speds on the homecoming and prom courts because we knew that would be the peak of their lives. Even they realized it didn’t mean they were popular or liked, but pitied and laughed at. Of course the Penny never dropped for dipshit Dax.

Given how immature and unfunny he is now, I can only imagine what an annoying tryhard he was back then. You're probably right about the implication of him getting pity votes. "Come on everyone. It'll mean a lot to the little guy." Only time he legitimately made them laugh was showing out on the stage like he'd won the lottery.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

You're probably right about the implication of him getting pity votes. "Come on everyone. It'll mean a lot to the little guy." Only time he legitimately made them laugh was showing out on the stage like he'd won the lottery.

If you’re out of high school and still talk about high school, you peaked way too early. It’s like people who wangled their way into an Ivy League university somehow (i.e. family legacy or family mega-donations) and never stop mentioning it as adults because they did nothing especially remarkable with that fine, expensive education. I’m surprised Dax doesn’t talk about his SAT scores too.

Also I love the implication that it’s really hard to make high school kids laugh.

 

[Ghost of GamerGate]

An interesting fellow Dick is, a man clinging to his past in hopes of still having some sort of relevancy in both the present and future.

Tries to be the life of the party as a means to escape his own mundane existence.

Though I do thoroughly enjoy the spectacle him and his posse provide.

Never a dull moment with those who he associates with.

"The past doesn't matter. People cling to it because it allows them to ignore the present - James Frey"

 

[Instapot]

At my high school we voted for speds on the homecoming and prom courts because we knew that would be the peak of their lives. Even they realized it didn’t mean they were popular or liked, but pitied and laughed at. Of course the Penny never dropped for dipshit Dax.

He is absolutely in denial of how much of a lolcow he was as a kid, but to him he's so cool from having money that he thinks that all those women would bang him now not realizing that it's his garbage personality that would still repulse most of them. Which is why all the women he's dated as an adult are all basket cases. Garbage personalities attract other garbage personalities. Maddox, Ralph, digi bro, etc. He tries to collect people too which is really fucking insane.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

to him he's so cool from having money that he thinks that all those women would bang him now not realizing that it's his garbage personality that would still repulse most of them

He also doesn’t realize that $20k/month isn’t that much money in LA. Quality women there go for men with property portfolios and six-figure (or more) monthly incomes. He could get an Alabama 6 or 7 on $20k, in Alabama, but that’s assuming he’s able to maintain his income. In LA he’s going to need a LOT more money to nab quality pussy. That’s why he’s with Marie. Dax isn’t rich, he isn’t wealthy, he’s just not as poor as some of his neighbors.

 

[Instapot]

He also doesn’t realize that $20k/month isn’t that much money in LA. Quality women there go for men with property portfolios and six-figure (or more) monthly incomes. He could get an Alabama 6 or 7 on $20k but that’s assuming he’s able to maintain his income. Dax isn’t rich, he isn’t wealthy, he’s just not as poor as some of his neighbors.

Oh I think he knows 20k isn't much but it's like we talked about it's how cool he is in his head to Ralph, etc. To trailer trash he is a king among men.

 

[no ledge]

Oh I think he knows 20k isn't much but it's like we talked about it's how cool he is in his head to Ralph, etc. To trailer trash he is a king among men.

20k a month is a damn good living.
I'm not a dax fan these days, but I wouldn't sneeze at it.
Agree that it doesn't make you special in the crews he wishes he ran with.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

20k a month is a damn good living.
I'm not a dax fan these days, but I wouldn't sneeze at it.
Agree that it doesn't make you special in the crews he wishes he ran with.

It’s not a “damn good living” in Los Angeles for a guy who aspires to fuck hot women and look down on his contemporaries. The only reason he can do the latter is that he chooses to hang out with the biggest losers imaginable, all conveniently outside of LA. Joke’s on him, because failure is contagious and he caught a raging case at some point.

 

[Kramer on the phone]

ust imagine growing up in California in the 90's, having a really cool dad that has money, as a little kid I bet dick was really smart compared to other kids too, but despite having all those advantages he couldn't get what he wanted the most, pussy. Which is really pathetic.

From what i remember, Dick's family was pretty average for their area. you have to remember especially back in the 90s, rich and poor was only determined by school district. Sure owning a scammy cleaning products company might make you the biggest thing in Inglewood, but where dick grew up making 6 figures a year was the norm. also if he was richer he or any of his friends he had on would have brought that up. i don't think he was noticeably uglier than the other AVclub kids. you are right about him probably being a sperg, if he's this without a clue now imagine him as a teen. honestly surprised he doesn't have a story about watching porn with the bros.

Just from Dick's way of talking about being in high school and the old photos you can tell he was obnoxious.

He is absolutely in denial of how much of a lolcow he was as a kid, but to him he's so cool from having money that he thinks that all those women would bang him now not realizing that it's his garbage personality that would still repulse most of them. Which is why all the women he's dated as an adult are all basket cases. Garbage personalities attract other garbage personalities. Maddox, Ralph, digi bro, etc. He tries to collect people too which is really fucking insane.

which again, if you're from west memphis or rural New york Dick's salary might seem cool, but he's clearly not doing extremely well compared to everyone else in LA bar hopping. Dick knows he's competing with the type of person he pretends to be (malibu millionare retirees+actual guys in hollywood) so him being an e-celeb isn't going to get women on him the way it would if he was in alabama and at a con and its a fan. its why despite living in LA all his life most of his sex partners are just women who fucked his friends or women from rural areas he basically had to ship in to fuck. Dick basically did the same thing to Ethan, he hyped up his big LA lifestyle, shows him the sights a few times a year then goes back to being your average joe. even the legit guys in LA the VPs of Live Nation Entertainment or deputy commissioners who could literally shut down Disneyland for kicks or guys who's businesses practically own every office chair in the county aren't banging models every weekend, mainly because that loses its luster for any non-mental dude once you hit 25-40. at that point its about marrying someone that won't annoy you, especially because you're probably had at least two failed marriages if you're 40 and realize its easier to get hookers if you want a hot chick and you'd rather be married to a woman that doesn't yap during movies or redesigns your house constantly or bitches at you about playing video games.

It reminds me of Opie doing those livestreams a few years back, when its pretty certain any white asshole eating dinner in the city is a millionaire your above-average ass isn't going to seem so cool. that should be the biggest tell dick was a loser, the fact that every one of his friends in the city treated him the same way richmond treats Ethan Ralph or the way TGWTG was treated in their home towns (remember busy street?) Its why almost every one of dicks associates the last decade are people from out of town. he can't get anyone around in a 30 mile zone to treat him like the rockstar comedian Lothario he pretends to be.

It’s not a “damn good living” in Los Angeles for a guy who aspires to fuck hot women and look down on his contemporaries. The only reason he can do the latter is that he chooses to hang out with the biggest losers imaginable, all conveniently outside of LA. Joke’s on him, because failure is contagious and he caught a raging case at some point.

you summed it up a lot better than i did. dick is cool if you hear LA and you think Entourage or Hollywood. if you think LA and go "where Diamond bar/el sereno/glendale/downey/fullerton/inglewood/compton/pasadena/burbank/long beach/city of industry/century city?" then dick is a fool. Plus he isn't really doing well compared to the people he went to high school with, thats probably why sean is willing to forgo payments, dick's income is genuinely middle class compared to where he grew up. its why his house isn't some big fancy mansion like you'd see in durte or sierra madre. To put it in perspective Dick makes about as much as Destiny, probably more cashflow because destiny has kids and employees to pay for, and Destiny has moved like 3x because he found a place with cheaper rent since he moved out to LA. if your income is at the point where people in your range constantly hunt for places to live, then yeah. you aren't making lots. hell thats probably why he decided to buy a house once the patreon took off, i'm sure he knew Maddox would get him banned. it literally happened almost near the same times too. so Maddox clearly threatened it, dick said "ill take the money and run" and that gave him the cushion to withstand almost all his friends leaving.

Look at the guest list for the first 20 dick show episodes compared to the most recent 20, it went from other struggling entertainers with podcasts and shows people might have watched, at least 3 of which won emmys, to vito+crippled. thats how much things have changed, those first 20 episodes are crazy relistening to when you know who the man is now. you go from one of the head writers of honest trailers to vito thats how much you've sunken in terms of friends. To comedians with tons of LA connections to rural pedos.

As most of you know, i'm not actually Pantsu, but a highly paid family guy writer. i'm bringing this up because my bit about "LA" vs LA got cut down to this in the latest episode. I did it for all of you. i hope you all are hyped for the chris-chan inspired episode coming out in 2023 (these take a long fucking time to animate, dumb gooks)

 

[Jack Awful]

As most of you know, i'm not actually Pantsu, but a highly paid family guy writer. i'm bringing this up because my bit about "LA" vs LA got cut down to this in the latest episode. I did it for all of you. i hope you all are hyped for the chris-chan inspired episode coming out in 2023 (these take a long fucking time to animate, dumb gooks)

I never realized Pantsu was a TV writer! Ralph is one lucky dog!

 

[Kramer on the phone]

I never realized Pantsu was a TV writer! Ralph is one lucky dog!

even TV writers make more than Dax, and there's about a dozen of those responsible for every show on. union minimums guarantee you make more than him, the difference is Dax supposedly only works 10hr a month.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

People talk about Dax living in LA because it’s where all the degenerates are, but notice all his friends (besides Sean and Marie) don’t even live there. Dax really thought he was going to hit the big time in LA, but I guarantee he has much higher name recognition in Mississippi and Wisconsin — by actual numbers, not percentages. Unfortunately for him they are very low numbers everywhere, even for an e-celeb. On the bright side, going full NAMBLA fan hasn’t won him growth in new audiences. Imagine being an out and proud pedophilia advocate and still failing to gain traction in the cesspool of internet degenerates.

 

[Tom Myers]

People talk about Dax living in LA because it’s where all the degenerates are, but notice all his friends (besides Sean and Marie) don’t even live there. Dax really thought he was going to hit the big time in LA, but I guarantee he has much higher name recognition in Mississippi and Wisconsin — by actual numbers, not percentages. Unfortunately for him they are very low numbers everywhere, even for an e-celeb. On the bright side, going full NAMBLA fan hasn’t won him growth in new audiences. Imagine being an out and proud pedophilia advocate and still failing to gain traction in the cesspool of internet degenerates.

Dax was born and grew up in LA you ignorant swine.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Dax was born and grew up in LA you ignorant swine.

Some of us move away from our hometowns when we graduate from high school. I know it’s probably outside your frame of reference.

 

[Tom Myers]

Some of us move away from our hometowns when we graduate from high school. I know it’s probably outside your frame of reference.

I don't live in my one stoplight redneck ass hometown, I went away from college.

Dax lives in LA, grew up there, and his parents live there too.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

I don't live in my one stoplight redneck ass hometown, I went away from college.

Dax lives in LA, grew up there, and his parents live there too.

That doesn't excuse that it's a fucking degenerate shit hole that anybody with a functional brain would leave.

 

[Instapot]

As most of you know, i'm not actually Pantsu, but a highly paid family guy writer. i'm bringing this up because my bit about "LA" vs LA got cut down to this in the latest episode. I did it for all of you. i hope you all are hyped for the chris-chan inspired episode coming out in 2023 (these take a long fucking time to animate, dumb gooks)

For some reason I can't reply to the long post you made. I completely agree with you about everything except two things. Your thinking about dicks perception from a normal adult and not a little narcissistic kid. A kid that thinks he's the shit for growing up where the movie stars live and Disneyland. You know how people from California are. They all think they are special just for living there like how Texans are about Texas. Now as adult like you said he can lure in trailer trash to worship him as thier pedo king. The second thinh you are wrong about is his jaw surgery. I knew a girl in high-school who had the same surgery. Her dad was a legit multi millionaire like 10's of millions maybe even in the 100's, and all she ever wanted was attention from the popular kids who were just attractive. My point is though that surgery they have to detach your jaw from your skull and reset it. It's a major major surgery where a lot can go wrong, and it's an expensive ass surgery. So dicks grill was fucked up, trust me.

The first 20 episodes with Larry, allegro, etc were all nobody's that got Emmys from shows they were very very very tiny parts of which is why they all gobbled on Maddoxs nuts for maybe just maybe they would get that taste of fame again or whatever retarded mental loops they jumped through to tell thier fake friends they are still relevant.