Prison Letters Chris and Kengle Prison Letter Megathread

[Skwisgaar Skwigelf]

Have you seen the propaganda commies have been making targeted to kids?

I have, they often deal with ideas significantly more complex than ponies trying to save pony land from a mean old dragon.

For this reason, I doubt Chris would absorb anything from Communist propaganda.

 

[NynchLiggers]

I have, they often deal with ideas significantly more complex than ponies trying to save pony land from a mean old dragon.

For this reason, I doubt Chris would absorb anything from Communist propaganda.

Twatter users treat communism similar to how pseudo-Christians treat the Bible: Ignoring completely the things they dislike that matter in the books.

If anything, CWC would be a perfect fit for being converted to modern socialist/anarchist ideas.

 

[Pickle Inspector]

Twatter users treat communism similar to how pseudo-Christians treat the Bible: Ignoring completely the things they dislike that matter in the books.

If anything, CWC would be a perfect fit for being converted to modern socialist/anarchist ideas.

The only thing Chris needs to understand about woke politics is the greater the victim the more clout you get and since he’s already declared himself to be top victim in the past he‘s already half way there, if it wasn’t for the whole raping his mother thing he’d basically be untouchable/uncancelable in those circles no matter what his behaviour was like but even now he might be welcomed as long as he continues to hate the right people and blames right wing trolls for tricking him.

 

[Skwisgaar Skwigelf]

Twatter users treat communism similar to how pseudo-Christians treat the Bible: Ignoring completely the things they dislike that matter in the books.

Saying that I think Marxisum is more complex than My Little Pony does not mean that I endorse or believe in those ideas.

Unless you consider My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic to be some kind of axiom on which society could be based?

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

Twatter users treat communism similar to how pseudo-Christians treat the Bible: Ignoring completely the things they dislike that matter in the books.

If anything, CWC would be a perfect fit for being converted to modern socialist/anarchist ideas.

No as I have said before CWC isn't even good for body count, he's got less of a backbone than ADF and is also more notorious than he is useful.

You may be able to get him to read each and every word from Marks and Lenin but he wouldn't comprehend 3% of there autistic ramblings, he can't even relate to any of the points they make as he's never worked he's never known discomfort and more imprtantly he is exactly what the sate Marxists and Lenisits are trying to avoid, if you can work you should work for the betterment of all, etc.

Chris is someone who exists outside of any political theiory apart from the west, he is a edge case in any form of social safetynet a society will set up, He is theoretically capable of working but he is also as thick as a whale omlet. and also recalcitrant towards effort.

The older I get the more supporting I am of the far left and right pov that there drains on society are best isolated and given the minimum to support them the better, I know it sounds disgusting but honestly if your incapable of being a productive member of society I'm forced to ask should society support them? It's one thing to become incapable from a accedent or later in life but to be a drain from the day your born to the day you die to be a net negative... I have to question if we are doing the right thing any more.

 

[NynchLiggers]

Saying that I think Marxisum is more complex than My Little Pony does not mean that I endorse or believe in those ideas.

Unless you consider My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic to be some kind of axiom on which society could be based?

Never said you endorsed it, only that if done correctly (Adapting the writings to him) a neo-marxist tard wrangler could convert him.

 

[Tikbalang]

Sorry if is late, but I'm tired of reading pages and pages about him being raped or being someone's bitch, and I haven't seen anyone clarify actual jail conditions.

I don't mean to powerlevel, but I've spent a short-ish time in jail (albeit high security) and you basement dwellers don't have a clue what it's like. He hasn't been raped, and it's highly unlikely he's been coerced into doing favors for Bubba or Jamal; he's simply too exceptional* to understand the nuance that underlies exploitation. Most dudes are in for DUI's, domestics, or drugs. Folks in jail are not trying to catch bodies or rape charges on some obese autist while they're pending trial. County fucking sucks prolapses and dudes are looking to either: get the fuck out, or get a short sentence where they can just chill in their cell, or move to prison where they can work on establishing some level of comfort. There's more bitch, moaning, complaining in the bubble when we get transferred to go to court because dudes just wanna get back to their cot and TV. If you're not in a gang unit, jail is just fuckin' boring as shit.

Also they segregate "disruptive groups" (i.e. gangs - national and local) into their own cell block. Depending on the jail he might get jumped on his way to chow for looking like a mark, but he's probably a lot safer locked up than he is outside. I was actually locked up with a tranny - full tits and everything. Dude got harassed by niggos, but never assaulted. He was, however relatively chill, which made them more liked.

I'm going to send a letter out Monday-ish (got work Saturday) asking Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonchu (PBUH) to detail some things. If you want me to ask anything, let me know and I will include it. Hopefully that will prevent a bunch of other threads from weens posting their letters from Christine the Beneficent, most merciful. I'm going to try to be agreeable to get him to open up a bit and maybe encourage some dialog:

1. A lot of jails give prisoners tablets after 30 days that can email & text people on the outside as well as buying books, music, games and renting movies. Being Virginia, I doubt it's free, but it'd be cool to know if it's available.
2. I'm interested in his daily going-ons and relationship with other inmates. Chris is crazy, but jail is full of wack-ass dudes and I'm dying to know how he gets along with other inmates.
3. I'm hoping to get him to open up about his lawyer since mine was more useless than a public defender and I wonder how their relationship effects his current situation
4. What's his prisoner ID **EDIT: if you want to send a dude that fucks his mom money; like montell jordan, this is how you'd do it.
5. Some jails allow you to send books directly to inmates, IME, only if it's directly from Amazon or B&N. This could be interesting.

Again, sorry if this is late or weenie, I've just been following this dude for like 1/3 of my life and he's just so goddamn fascinating. I'm super drunk.

*by exceptional I mean the r-slur.

I'm curious whether or not he'll make prison comics. I want to know if he ever thought of getting an electric chair (because he believe his body is an insulator).

 

[thegooddoctor]

There's a grim possibility that Chris was deliberately selected as the winner of that contest because it would make for a more glurgey news story for the company.

Would really cast all this shit in a different light if true. Its not like we'll ever know for sure though.

Oh for sure he was chosen because of his Autism,I’m not doubting that he probably did win the contest, due to his symbiotic relationship with Sonic, but with the growing rise of understanding of Autism in the public eye during the 80s/90s he was absolutely chosen because he was deemed ‘special’ and the news team wanted a fluff piece for the network to promote a positive story and to look ‘woke’ in the eyes of the viewing public. They wanted to choose a kid who clearly stood out as being a ‘special’ brave child having to burden such a condition to make them look like a kind and benevolent news station fighting for all the poor soldiers who have to carry the so stressful burdens of the autistic spectrum. This event was profound in formulating Chris’s ego and worldview, because he saw autism as something that can get him whatever he wants and believed he was better than others for having it. It’s truly a tragedy because The sonic sweepstakes was essentially the climax of his life and if he had never won it I think we’d be looking a far less entitled, mentally warped Chris than we see today.

I mean possibly not, he may have turned out nearly as bad, but at least he’d probably be less egotistical and have a better grip over his autism and fucked brain, I guess we’ll never know now…

 

[Uncle Meat]

Oh yeah, he'll absolutely lose it like anybody would. I think Barb is a point of obsession for him as well so on top of his routine being ripped from out of his feet in a new environment, plus the trauma of death and the new environment (14BC) without a carer of which he was mutually a carer for.

I wouldn't wish death or that loss on people but I also think the trauma from the loss won't outweigh him being forced to pick up the pieces in order to survive.

The other option is for him to crack and go looking for revenge for the jerkops who separated him from Barb when he was trying to save her. He might end up blaming the whole thing on the evil government and unfair laws and friends who stood by and did nothing, and end up like a lot of other crazy/dangerous homeless people with a chip on their shoulder. Adversity brings out the best in some people, but it can also bring out the worst.

 

[Harginn]

He would hate that because there would be no pictures.

And if there were, they would lack the colorful, childlike energy needed to hold his attention.

I have something that would capture Chris's attention

The Bolshevik Hedgehog (P. Yakovlev, 1925)

 

[Coldgrip]

No as I have said before CWC isn't even good for body count, he's got less of a backbone than ADF and is also more notorious than he is useful.

Philip is far more cowardly than Chris. Both are speds with egos, but whereas Phil will talk shit from the safety from his home about something he dislikes, Chris will actually go out to either protest or complain; the blarms incident being the go to example of this.

 

[dirtydeanna96]

This is how I knew you're new here without looking at your profile.

If you write to him, ask him where is it said in the Bible that Jesus had sex with his mother and does this mean that Bob isn't his father, since Jesus was the result of immaculate conception.

this is how i know you're not Christian. Jesus was the virgin birth, not the immaculate conception.
you have CWC tier biblical knowledge

It’s a common misconception (no pun intended) that “Immaculate Conception” refers to the Roman Catholic teaching that the Virgin Mary conceived Jesus without having sex. But that belief is known as the Virgin Birth of Jesus.

“The Virgin Birth refers to Jesus being born of a woman who was a virgin,” the Rev. James Martin, a Jesuit priest and author, told HuffPost. “His birth is miraculous because Mary conceived a child without having sexual relations with a man.”

Immaculate Conception instead refers to Mary’s conception in the womb of her mother, St. Anne. The idea is that Mary was conceived without the stain of original sin, or born free from original sin.

 

[CharlesBarkley]

I hope Chris writes another letter asking his true and honest fans to buttrape the guards and to free him from jail so he can finish the merge with his divine powers.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

this is how i know you're not Christian. Jesus was the virgin birth, not the immaculate conception.
you have CWC tier biblical knowledge

It’s a common misconception (no pun intended) that “Immaculate Conception” refers to the Roman Catholic teaching that the Virgin Mary conceived Jesus without having sex. But that belief is known as the Virgin Birth of Jesus.

“The Virgin Birth refers to Jesus being born of a woman who was a virgin,” the Rev. James Martin, a Jesuit priest and author, told HuffPost. “His birth is miraculous because Mary conceived a child without having sexual relations with a man.”

Immaculate Conception instead refers to Mary’s conception in the womb of her mother, St. Anne. The idea is that Mary was conceived without the stain of original sin, or born free from original sin.

Well, actually it was believed that original sin comes from the father, since woman's role in conception was basically "giving a place for seed to develop into human", so if Christ was conceived from God and not mortal human, then he is free of it. I am using Arthur Holmes's series of lection on history of philosophy as a source.

 

[Tikbalang]

Well, actually it was believed that original sin comes from the father, since woman's role in conception was basically "giving a place for seed to develop into human", so if Christ was conceived from God and not mortal human, then he is free of it. I am using Arthur Holmes's series of lection on history of philosophy as a source.

To Chris, the biggest sins is anything that affects him personally, and only him.

• The though of him as a lolcow (anyone in general including Tara Strong and SNT)
• Catfish/Cock-blocking (Pickleman and Bluespike)
• Deny him from entering your business/institution (The dean and the gamestore owner)
• Kick him out of the building (The dean and the gamestore owner)
• Leaking of embarrassing media (Julie and the Teen Toon Squad)
• Extort him money for larping (the idea guys)
• The greatest sin of all: Telling his stupidity in public (Null)

This is the seven deadly sins of Chris Chanity. You're fucked if you do that to Chris. It's a fair game to everyone else (hence it's narcisism).

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

To Chris, the biggest sins is anything that affects him personally, and only him.

• The though of him as a lolcow (anyone in general including Tara Strong and SNT)
• Catfish/Cock-blocking (Pickleman and Bluespike)
• Deny him from entering your business/institution (The dean and the gamestore owner)
• Kick him out of the building (The dean and the gamestore owner)
• Leaking of embarrassing media (Julie and the Teen Toon Squad)
• Extort him money for larping (the idea guys)
• The greatest sin of all: Telling his stupidity in public (Null)

This is the seven deadly sins of Chris Chanity. You're fucked if you do that to Chris. It's a fair game to everyone else (hence it's narcisism).

So the AntiChris is going to spit blasphemy at his name by calling him naive?

 

[Sharkbait]

I want a Chris-chan nasheed so badly. Abu Ali, get on it you useless sand nigger!

 

[Pointless Sperg]

Rapists don't get off. Especially when they try to justify their actions. The best they can hope for is to get the charges reduced. Even with a plea bargain, Chris is going to plead guilty to either incest or elder sexual abuse so he will get put on the sex offender's registry. The prosecutor won't let that not happen. The rape charge will be the bargaining chip, and it will most likely be a behind closed doors deal where Chris pleads guilty on the lesser crime of incest, or the prosecutor will charge him with rape and elder sexual abuse on top of the incest.

Even without a prior record, Chris has proven himself to be a danger to vulnerable people. That is why they will make sure they charge him with something that gets him on the list. People need to be warned about him and he needs to be watched for the rest of his life. This goes beyond punishment. It's making sure he never gets into a situation where he can take advantage of someone again.

Re: The third letter: Not much there except babble. But it is funny he is calling himself Mrs. Jesus now.

I still think that his attorney will push for a simple incest charge, which does not put you on the sex offender registry automatically unless the other party is ruled incapable of consent. They can give Chris a year in jail and drop any attempt at framing it as elder abuse. Chris still goes to jail for a year or so but is in a better position when he gets out. The registry is kind of a heavy bludgeon and damn close to a life sentence (or at least a huge chunk of your life on the lowest tier) and people will often plead guilty to other charges and take longer sentences in exchange for not having to be on the registry.

The prosecution is free to cut any kind of deal they want as long as it doesn't generate bad press. "Pled guilty to incest, 12 months in jail" is probably enough to avoid any serious backlash.

I'm going to send a letter out Monday-ish (got work Saturday) asking Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonchu (PBUH) to detail some things. If you want me to ask anything, let me know and I will include it. Hopefully that will prevent a bunch of other threads from weens posting their letters from Christine the Beneficent, most merciful. I'm going to try to be agreeable to get him to open up a bit and maybe encourage some dialog:

I'm deathly curious if Chris has hit the commissary for Whole Shabang chips, and what he thinks of them.

Oh yeah, he'll absolutely lose it like anybody would.

I'm calling it now. If Barb dies while Chris is in jail (or even after with the probable no-contact order), and especially if it happens in the near future, Chris will blame it on the state for preventing him from using his goddess healing powers, and will declare that he was what was keeping Barb alive, therefore the state killed her.

 

[James Edwin]

can the dimensional merge just happen already so we can all live in paradise with Chris as the queen of reality

just end this dying hellscape please

 

[RodgerDodger]

The envelope was literally stamped with something saying they didn't. Are people too exceptional to read the OP?
View attachment 2628201

I'm pretty sure after having to read the first letter to Null, the Sheriff's Union threatened to strike if ever forced to do that again.