Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votes: 26 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votes: 146 5.5%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votes: 379 14.2%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votes: 545 20.5%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votes: 394 14.8%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votes: 318 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votes: 192 7.2%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votes: 661 24.8%

  • Total voters
    2,661
All the strain of international travel, messy benders in cow-country
About that — we have a law that requires the parent who’s going with kids abroad to acquire agreement from another one (to prevent kidnapping, I assume)
Is there anything similar in US?
 
Of course they are. They think it makes them sound deep.

Science is hard but anyone can "learn" astrology/tarot/alternative therapies/other complete shite that's just made-up really easily and then think they're proclaiming some huge truths about themselves and others. It's like the nutjobs who witter on about INTZ or whatever, with no real understanding. Humans don't break down into twelve or sixteen clearly defined groupings with strict parameters and they're especially not governed by entirely subjective groupings of stars as perceived by us that aren't even grouped together in reality.

It's like Big Albert and her dinosaurs. Ask TenTon which stars form the cluster to which we have arbitrarily designated a pattern and watch the derp leak from her stupid fat head. Ask her to specify one thing about any of those stars and nope, no brain happening here. Fucking ridiculous.....but then I would say that cos Scorpio. Jeeeeezus.


Sorry gorls, bit of a sperg. But it is a privilege to visit other countries that many other Americans would truly love and appreciate and it absolutely boils my blisters that this moronic oaf can make a 12thC castle about her. An ancient spring bath about her. A village church, with all that entails, about her. I'm not religious but these places are special and I just cannot fathom standing in a nine hundred year old building that has weathered catastrophic religious strife and not externalizing the experience, especially when your home country doesn't have equivalents. The churchyards hold entire families with living links still in the villages today; she's a mother (barely) yet did she look at the records of the stones and realise how many children other mothers buried before modern medicine? The tragedy of a raft of tiny burials telling the story of long-vanquished diseases that took entire generations as each family fell under the dread spectre of pandemics past? The war plaques, with their dreadful story carved as a list of names? The mother-and-baby burials with a simple marker that tells a whole heartbreaking story in one single date?

No. She took a fucking selfie.

Fuck off back to LA, you shallow, self-absorbed cretinous blobosaur. Do not pass Go, most certainly do not go and shit all over other European countries, go straight back to LA. Then we can bomb it to buggery because if this is what LA is, the world doesn't need it.


I know, I know. Hats for MOTI. But I've seen US colleagues profoundly affected by history that we live within here and it's just wasted on this airheaded twat.


ETA @blue gopher snakes Yep, you're right. I can't remember the deets either but I think there's another "house" somewhere in between Scorpio and.....whatever the hell comes before it.

It's similar to the pyramidiots who try to see star spacing proving aliens or nine billion years old. But once the orbital axis and precession of the equinoxes and other clever stuff is taken into account our perception of it all changes anyway.

As an American, I say we do not want RYAN Hooves back.

I propose we send her to Tristan da Cunha.
She'll LOVE the local cuisine. Might even make her lose weight for a change.
 
I’m a Britbong by birth but reached drinking age in a balmy-climed lager-swilling Commonwealth outpost. I visited family in Manchester at the height of Baggy, stepping off the plane undaunted by the icy Northern wind and utterly convinced of my native ability to hold my own amongst the hardened drinkers and E-boshing ravers of t’auld country.

Night 1 on the Boddingtons, scratchings, doner and resulted in a violent public faceplant into my own copious brown sick. There was loud jeering and whistles. I prayed for death’s sweet mercy for days afterwards.
Plastic face Tess is definitely not a 24-hour party person.
 
I’m half convinced that British pub culture is an insidious long-term form of revenge on the rest of the world for the dissolution of the Empire.

I’m a Britbong by birth but reached drinking age in a balmy-climed lager-swilling Commonwealth outpost. I visited family in Manchester at the height of Baggy, stepping off the plane undaunted by the icy Northern wind and utterly convinced of my native ability to hold my own amongst the hardened drinkers and E-boshing ravers of t’auld country.

Night 1 on the Boddingtons, scratchings, doner and resulted in a violent public faceplant into my own copious brown sick. There was loud jeering and whistles. I prayed for death’s sweet mercy for days afterwards.

If Tess is still on her gourmand’s tour of the “gastropub” circuit, she’s sharting things that look like the Lindow Man by now. Serves her bloody right.
I understood about a quarter of what you said but agree with all of it.
 
It's the other thing common (in addition to LoL fat) among these gorls - they're all into this shit.
It’s very consistent with their mindset when you think about it. Much like how they think they’re fat from anything other than a bad diet, they believe everything that happens to them is predestined because a planet is in retrograde. Anything and everything except bad diets, lack of exercise, and poor life choices in general. People who think life happens at them because giving up control means giving up responsibility.

Anyway, Tubbers is a cancer in astrology and real life so broken clocks being right twice a day and all that.
 
I'm asking this same question in the internet pagans thread, but can anyone translate this from astrololard? We know she's the type of person to say "I'm X so that explains why I'm so Y."
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She's also posting a lot of "Please get vaccinated" shit on instagram, which makes me unironically MOTI given what a fat pile of shit she is, so I'm not gonna post those.
Astrology: The Low IQ Alert for the modern age.
 
As an American, I say we do not want RYAN Hooves back.

I propose we send her to Tristan da Cunha.
She'll LOVE the local cuisine. Might even make her lose weight for a change.
Divert her flight to the Malvinas (Mexican London) and just leave her there.
See if her presence alone is enough to settle which side wants it most.
 
I'll split the difference.

South Georgia Island. She can live with her own kind, plus she won't even notice the smell.
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Yes I know how elephant seals work. Mine was a deliberate artistic choice.
 
You see this freakish out-of-breath scowling bitchface coming at you on the Underground (sans ears and holding a fart sandwich instead of a water bottle), and you happen to do an automatic double-take at its wildly amorphous non-human shape and audacious delusion, but sure, say hi! You know you want to, cutie.
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Those legs are really something. If you cropped the picture just above the feet and just below the skirt/pants/tent-thing so you just saw the legs and the knee-area. Could you tell which direction the knee bends? I can't. I can't tell which direction the knee-cap is facing.
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You can guess, is this a picture from the front or the back, and unless you saw the original uncropped picture you would guess wrong 99 times out of a 100.
This is fucking turbo-haram.

EDIT: showed the pic to my wife. She said: 100% that is her ass. Hahahahaha.
 
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Those legs are really something. If you cropped the picture just above the feet and just below the skirt/pants/tent-thing so you just saw the legs and the knee-area. Could you tell which direction the knee bends? I can't. I can't tell which direction the knee-cap is facing.
View attachment 2650341
That's a front view? Shiiieeeet.
 
"Wake up at 5 am halfway down a staircase with your neck at a right angle and your gut feels like a washing machine."

Been there, done that. More than I care to admit. I felt this description in my bones.

Thank God I'm old and don't do that shit anymore.
You didn't have to get old to leave that. Self-respect would have done it much earlier.
 
Those legs are really something. If you cropped the picture just above the feet and just below the skirt/pants/tent-thing so you just saw the legs and the knee-area. Could you tell which direction the knee bends? I can't. I can't tell which direction the knee-cap is facing.
View attachment 2650341
She must not do much walking there at all, that chub rub would be HORRENDOUS. I guess maybe her legs have just gotten so big they don’t move at all at the thigh, so she doesn’t get it as bad.
 
Weird how astrology hoes always have signs that dismiss their flaws of being bitchy self absorbed navel gazing assholes while praising them for being emotionally draining narcissists who cry too much. Convenient.

I think astrology tells plenty about those who obsess over it. It tells me to avoid them at all costs lest I get sucked into the most banal and idiotic conversation possible with people of low emotional intelligence who think they have a jeweler’s loupe into the soul if they can figure out which month you were born.

But that’s like, so Capricorn of me!
Obese girls can't figure out how calories in/out works, yet they can memorize a bunch of elaborate utter bullshit about how sun/moon/rising/whatever the fuck somehow magically determines someone's personality.

It kind of makes sense though... body shape/weight and personality are both influenced by a combination of actions and life circumstances plus a much smaller amount from genetics. Fatties are usually too dumb to grasp this or too lazy to admit it, so they cling to deterministic bullshit like haes/fa/astrology to explain why shit is the way it is and why making an effort to change is pointless.
 
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She must not do much walking there at all, that chub rub would be HORRENDOUS. I guess maybe her legs have just gotten so big they don’t move at all at the thigh, so she doesn’t get it as bad.
I dunno, I think she smears some sort of Body Glide-type product or Vaseline all up in there. Looks like even a few minutes of walking is enough to cause severe chafing for her.

Am I imagining things, or is some chafing visible in this pic?
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You didn't have to get old to leave that. Self-respect would have done it much earlier.

Freddy Mercury "had a lot of fun" in the end paid for it sad, weak and with a rotten foot

Reeeeeeeeee give me my Kiwi Farms back! Isn't this where we drop any form of respect and decency so we can pick apart tards on 't internetsies?

If we've suddenly found Jesus I wish to talk to the management.
 
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