Bad Weddings and Wedding Trends - sperg about weddings here

[Gaz Norfman]

Wedding favor time.
It's a plastic piece of crap.
Thank you open bar​

Thoughts on this?
View attachment 2665928
This is from the same shop, lol
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Here’s my uninvited Ring Shopping Tip:
I highly recommend going to a jewelry store to try things on if you aren’t someone who wears rings or jewelry often. You might be surprised by what you like and don’t like on your hand. I really liked the idea of a halo ring, pave band, or a pear shaped diamond before I went in, and trying them on really changed what I liked and didn’t. I found out pretty quickly that too much sparkle didn’t feel like “me.”
Also, don’t feel obligated to by from the jewelry store afterwards. But if you feel bad wasting a salesperson’s time, you could also buy a cheap cubic zirconia ring or two on Amazon to see if you like the shape and size on your hand (and maybe return it afterward if you want).

Spoiler: Jewelry store diamond sperging

I personally like diamonds and was interested in getting a diamond engagement ring and holy shit the diamonds at jewelry stores are retarded expensive for what you get. I got really into diamond grading for a time and learning all about diamonds, and the store I went to had diamonds that sucked on some level. For example, one ring included a 1ct diamond with good color (I think it was a D?), but you could see inclusions looking at it without a loupe (it was an I2). And the whole ring cost $10,000. For reference, you can get a diamond with the same color and fewer inclusions for $2,500 at Rare Carat. So fiancé and I ended up getting the ring on rare carat, which is pretty good except for their cringy ads.
Also, I’m pretty sure that if you buy a diamond ring from a website, most of the websites share a pool of diamonds. I don’t know if this is common knowledge or not. But basically, when you go to James Allen (for example) and build a diamond ring, you can look through different diamonds and pick one you want. Then you could go to Brilliant Earth or another site and build a diamond ring, and the same diamond will be there down to the same inclusions, grading, etc. Literally the same diamond, the only difference is the price, and it will cost way more at one site than another for no reason I can tell. Unsure if this is true for lab-grown diamonds.

 

[Fialovy]

For favors, we're doing local hand-made soaps and seed-bombs. Simple things that people will actually use, and will actually be good for the environment, instead of junk that will gather dust or go straight into the trash.

What are your thoughts on monograms? I find them outdated and cheesy (especially if there's only one monogram/one letter), but for some reason, they're still all the rage.

First of all, congrats! Second of all, those actually sound awesome.

As for monograms, not a big fan, Especially if your names spell or make a really bad acronym like SM, BS, BM, CD, DP, ect. But yeah, I remember a time when it seemed like everyone had to have monogrammed everything in the 90s, it was kind of silly.

 

[Owlflaps]

What is your opinion on Moissanite?

Also, a really hotly debated topic on Weddingbee is whether a cash fund or honeymoon fund is acceptable or not. A lot of them say no that is rude and you shouldn't ask for cash and shouldn't expect guests to pay for your honeymoon, while proponents say that it is a good alternative to a traditional registry items if you have lived together (or even on your own). I think usually the best way to go for registries is to find stuff to either upgrade or the really fancy state of the art cooking stuff especially if you are a really good cook. I know some people also say to put stuff on the registry like board games and video game consoles, but I will be honest and say that is pretty childish (I know on Jack Jr.'s registry he listed a Harry Potter chess set). Registries even have it so multiple people can pool together money on big ticket items which is pretty neat.

From my experience with honeymoon funds, it is set up like you are paying for experiences, but in reality, you are just getting cash and you can spend it however you want and "embezzle" it. Also, honeymoon funds also have like a 2% fee that they take from your gifts. I am honestly not a big fan and most of my guests weren't either and just gave cash with their cards which most guests do anyways especially since many feel it is fair to "pay for their meal" and whatnot even though it obviously isn't necessary.

Wedding registries are tacky, imo. People who ask others to pay for their honeymoon is gauche. You're asking for a 300 dollar attachment for a pasta maker AND a trip to Mexico? Biiiiiitch

 

[Fialovy]

Wedding registries are tacky, imo. People who ask others to pay for their honeymoon is gauche. You're asking for a 300 dollar attachment for a pasta maker AND a trip to Mexico? Biiiiiitch

I can see why people think registries are necessary since there are a lot of guests that don't know what to get you or what you need, but one of the biggest things you aren't supposed to do is ever tell anyone about the registry or list it on any invite unless they ask you specifically. I will say though, there is nothing wrong with going off-registry. Some of my favorite gifts we got were gifts that weren't on the registry including some really nice paintings that various guests painted. If people know the couple well enough, they shouldn't be afraid to go off registry.

I do think cash registries are overrated though, especially since they take that 2 percent off each cash gift you get.

Also, noticed this today on weddingwire. What do you think of cigar bars? I honestly think unless you have an area to smoke away from the main reception area, it just seems like a smelly, smoky nightmare. I have also recall a post of someone doing something similar but with weed, hopefully I can find it, but I also think that is worse because it is like if weed is so much part of your identity that you have to include it at your wedding, then you have a weed problem.

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

 

[EnemyStand]

Also, noticed this today on weddingwire. What do you think of cigar bars? I honestly think unless you have an area to smoke away from the main reception area, it just seems like a smelly, smoky nightmare. I have also recall a post of someone doing something similar but with weed, hopefully I can find it, but I also think that is worse because it is like if weed is so much part of your identity that you have to include it at your wedding, then you have a weed problem.

View attachment 2667230

Cigar bars should be at every wedding. You can always have a box of cheapies or if that's too much tell your guests to bring their own (trust me, they will). It's great for the guys in the wedding party to help de-stress after working on the wedding and pairs exceptionally well with the open bar, which should also be at every wedding. In fact, we should have cigar bars on every street corner, every school, and every apartment building. People who whine about the smell just need to get used to it.

TL;DR: I'm a woman's nightmare and wonder why I'm still single.

 

[NoReturn]

View attachment 2667318

This photographer was just being cruel, or the people who suggested the photo were being dumb.

I can see why people think registries are necessary since there are a lot of guests that don't know what to get you or what you need, but one of the biggest things you aren't supposed to do is ever tell anyone about the registry or list it on any invite unless they ask you specifically.

We've found another cultural thing. I've seen the registry included on the wedding invitations a lot, but it's usually in small print or worked in somewhere natural.

Wedding registries are tacky, imo. People who ask others to pay for their honeymoon is gauche. You're asking for a 300 dollar attachment for a pasta maker AND a trip to Mexico? Biiiiiitch

I can understand their practicality when it's for situations where the couple already lives together so they already own the essentials.
The most tasteful honeymoon "fund" I've seen was a setup where friends and family worked together to plan and pay for the trip. It was a replacement for a registry and actually kind of fun since we knew the couple well.

 

[girlblogging]

View attachment 2667318

the two girls on the left look like the only normal ones. why would you even do this if not to take the piss out of the fat bride?

also as eurotrash i have no idea what bridesmaids are supposed to do and why do you even have them. here we have godfather and godmother (who double as legal witnesses) and that's it from the wedding party. if you do russian orthodox, the godfather and godmother's duties are the hold a crown above your head for the whole ceremony (which can take a while) like so

i heard plenty of bitching about this, and have seen a woman once drop the crown on the bride. (un)fortunately, bride didn't freak out, crown was quickly picked up and ceremony continued

there is plenty of wedding drama, obviously, but more of the eastern european flavor of shooting guns in the air, 3-day long weddings in a tent, people getting hammered and fighting, the usual stuff.

 

[eternal dog mongler]

Also, not something where they have to be responsible to take care of like a plant, like, I have seen the trend of succulents being popular as gifts and I am just like, first of all, if I am traveling, how am I supposed to travel with this as to not stress the plant out, two, if it is a succulent, my house is pretty dark and they need a lot of light, three you have to consider your animals that you have and whether or not they will eat them and if they are poisonous to them. Many people think of plants as expendable, but they really aren't, they are living things that you should try your best to keep them healthy and thriving. I mean, despite what vegans want you to believe, they can feel pain.

I'd be appreciative of microsucculents, although I already have a bunch of them already. They're pretty hardy and it wouldn't be too much trouble traveling with them.

For most people, no, that would be weird as hell as a wedding favor. I'm a dirty hippie at heart though.

 

[madethistocomment]

Wedding favor time.
It's a plastic piece of crap.
Thank you open bar​

Thoughts on this?
View attachment 2665928
This is from the same shop, lol
View attachment 2665933

It's a lovely setting, but I think it needs some variety in stone color because that's a lotta moissanite. Again, due to their great sparkliness I'm of the opinion that moissanite rings look the best when there's only really one prominent stone on the ring due to its ability to draw the eye. Maybe instead of it all being moissanite, have the central gem be a colored stone like an emerald, sapphire, or garnet. (or maybe morganite or a nice pale amethyst if you want to go for softer colors) Then it'd simultaneously make it a both more interesting and more toned down all at once by focusing the attention to the centerpiece of the ring.

The other one's kind of interesting (the bark pattern thing sounds cool on paper), but definitely not my cup of tea. I'm not crazy about the bark pattern on the band- it doesn't really look like bark, just vaguely distressed/crinkled, and is kind of ugly ngl. It does only have the one prominent stone thing going on though, so points there lmao. It's definitely not worth the price they're asking for though, Jesus.

 

[Burned CDs]

the two girls on the left look like the only normal ones. why would you even do this if not to take the piss out of the fat bride?

also as eurotrash i have no idea what bridesmaids are supposed to do and why do you even have them. here we have godfather and godmother (who double as legal witnesses) and that's it from the wedding party. if you do russian orthodox, the godfather and godmother's duties are the hold a crown above your head for the whole ceremony (which can take a while) like so View attachment 2667811

i heard plenty of bitching about this, and have seen a woman once drop the crown on the bride. (un)fortunately, bride didn't freak out, crown was quickly picked up and ceremony continued

there is plenty of wedding drama, obviously, but more of the eastern european flavor of shooting guns in the air, 3-day long weddings in a tent, people getting hammered and fighting, the usual stuff.

This seems pretty cool. I'm east European, but irreligious, however the crown thing seems like something I'd like to do if I was to ever get married.

 

[Fialovy]

also as eurotrash i have no idea what bridesmaids are supposed to do and why do you even have them

Bridesmaids are generally your good female friends/sisters/cousins that you basically have them stand beside you at the alter as support pretty much, though they usually also help plan stuff like the bridal shower and bachelorette party. The tradition originally came from I think where there would be multiple girls dressed like the bride as protection against evil spirits or something. Some women don't have a lot of female friends or relatives and usually they either forgo the tradition or if they have male friends, a more recent thing is have them as "bridesmen."

Also, yes! I found the post about the weed bouquet. What is with stoners and having to put weed into every aspect of their identity?



Also, she says this to her critics, which, I say, yes, I would judge you if drinking was such a part of your identity that you had to make your wedding based on nothing but drinking. I would also say you are probably an alcoholic if that is the case.

 

[EnemyStand]

Bridesmaids are generally your good female friends/sisters/cousins that you basically have them stand beside you at the alter as support pretty much, though they usually also help plan stuff like the bridal shower and bachelorette party. The tradition originally came from I think where there would be multiple girls dressed like the bride as protection against evil spirits or something. Some women don't have a lot of female friends or relatives and usually they either forgo the tradition or if they have male friends, a more recent thing is have them as "bridesmen."

Not sure if I posted this in this thread, but groomsmen came from a similar tradition. Back in the old days, your "best man" wasn't necessarily your brother or best friend. It was the biggest badass you could find. Reason being you didn't want someone objecting when padre said "Speak now or forever hold your piece" (that used to actually mean something) and challenging you to a duel to the death while you're trying to get hitched, especially if you were a noble and you had other dudes who wanted her daddy's money (or her daddy/uncle/brother REALLY didn't like you). If you had a really high value bride, you'd bring a few badasses just in case Badass #1 got killed in a previous duel because 7 dudes objected. However, since this was such an important duty, not bringing along your brother or battle buddy could be seen as a major slight, and families where this was an issue normally trained their kids in the sword or spear anyway. Hiring mercenaries wasn't unheard of, but was rarely done. As we moved into more boring civilized times, wedding duels fell out of favor and needing someone to help protect your new bride was unnecessary, so it moved into whoever the groom wanted to have hang out with him at the reception.

Also, yes! I found the post about the weed bouquet. What is with stoners and having to put weed into every aspect of their identity?

View attachment 2668252

They think it's a personality. It's not, it just means you like murdering your braincells.

Also, she says this to her critics, which, I say, yes, I would judge you if drinking was such a part of your identity that you had to make your wedding based on nothing but drinking. I would also say you are probably an alcoholic if that is the case.

View attachment 2668257

Psh, as if the open bar at the reception isn't enough for a "drunk" theme. Hell, I could have a booze themed wedding with just a couple of my uncles being there.

 

[Overcast]

Not sure if it’s because I’m a socially awkward dude, but I like the idea of a small wedding at a church or by the ocean with only close family and friends. Nothing extravagant, but something intimate and meaningful.

Anyway, I recall browsing /r/RATS and saw a wedding thread where the bride and groom dressed in pink and blue rat costumes respectively. Tails and all.

Like, it’s cool you bonded over rats, but goddamn did you really have to wear what are essentially footie pajamas at your own wedding? With TAILS?

 

[Fialovy]

Okay, I went down the whole rabbit hole right now and apparently weed weddings are very much a thing there are even guides about planning them and also a few articles of couples having weed weddings in legal states.

 

[Overcast]

I look at stuff like that and wonder what type of people the couple are. Are you really so lacking in personality that you need to have a themed wedding around stuff like weed, Star Wars, GoT, ect. to make yourself stand out? Because when I look at that kind of stuff, I don't think of the couple in question, I think about the what the theme is based off of.

You invite me to say... a Final Fantasy themed wedding, and instead of me thinking about how pretty the bride looks in her dress, I'm gonna be thinking about all the times I played Final Fantasy IX and how much time I spent doing Chocobo Hot 'N' Cold to get to Ozma. Or if you invite me to a Monster Hunter themed wedding, I'll be thinking about how many hours I spent farming Vaal Hazzak to get that fucking gem for its armor set.

 

[Slowboat to China]

Best wedding favor I ever got was also one of the simplest -- a mug and a packet of tea. Tea got drunk, mug still gets used ... Not to drink from, admittedly, but I do a lot of prop painting and always have a couple of paint water mugs in rotation.

I don't understand the practice of giving out little plastic thingies of bubbles, though. Pretty much every wedding I've been to in the last 25 years included bubbles in their party favors. I guess it entertains the kids, but beyond that, it's just stuff to throw out.

 

[Bakarina]

I don't understand the practice of giving out little plastic thingies of bubbles, though. Pretty much every wedding I've been to in the last 25 years included bubbles in their party favors. I guess it entertains the kids, but beyond that, it's just stuff to throw out.

People used to throw rice at weddings when the bride and groom left for their honeymoon for some reason but when this ended up not being good for the wildlife in most areas they switched to mini bubble wands. The tradition has faded and died but some aspects still live on

 

[Fialovy]

So on Etsy, I noticed these wine labels you can put on gift wine for wedding gifts where you are supposed to drink the wine for various marriage milestones. I noticed one of them is "first baby" which I don't know about you, but that just seems like a bad idea because what if later the couple turns out to be infertile or otherwise turn out can't/not want to have kids for whatever reason? It just sounds like a recipe for failure if that happens.



Infact, British people, correct me if I am wrong, but I heard of this old tradition where you save cake until your baby's first christening which just sounds... disgusting especially since it can take way longer to have a baby than a year and not every couple is ready to have one right when they get married for many reasons. I know in the US the tradition is save the top of the cake for the anniversary which seems a little more reasonable and bakeries do show you how to store it.

I admit, I am curious how our wedding cake will taste this coming April. My cousins who have gotten married have said theirs stored well and tasted not half bad, but still, that tradition originally came from when wedding cakes were more fruit-cakey, but at the same time, freezers weren't really much of a thing I don't think. Oh well, what is the worst that can happen?

What do you guys think about storing and eating your wedding cake on your first anniversary?

 

[NoReturn]

What do you guys think about storing and eating your wedding cake on your first anniversary?

Icky yicky no thank you. Why would I want stale cake to celebrate something awesome?
I think the wine thing is a great alternative, but I've also seen things like going back to the same baker to get a mini-cake made fresh (so you can taste what your wedding cake actually tasted like on your wedding day).