DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Phil's problem is that he never thinks to look at any new indy titles, unless it's to play them back to back in a "marathon" where he doesn't get invested enough to want to keep playing afterward. In just the "hardcore gaming season" he missed
Warioware
Cruisin' blast
Eastward
The console release of nexomon
Actraiser
Castlevania
Hot wheels unleashed
Melty blood
Astria Ascending
Death's gambit, a 2d soulslike, we all know how much he likes them
That fucking Nicktoons shit
METROID FUCKING DREAD, HOW CAN THE "KING OF RETRO" FUCKING MISS IT?
Monster crown
Guardians of the galaxy
Caligula effect 2
Console release of Dusk
Mario party

And that was from just the switch eshop and just ones that caught my eye, there bound to be even more on ps5, Xbox and especially steam. There are practically games released every day from indie devs but Phil, the little guy by his own admission, gives these little guys no time of day.

Really sets my bullshit senses tingling over that youtuber's life shit he played.
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That's bullshit, dood! When you spam the forum one more time with your nonsense, I'm gonna ban you. I'm tired of it. He is a moron who doesn't know what he's talking about. Cause you are just sitting here trying to derail the stream and try to contradict everything I'm saying. You can go fuck yourself! NO REALLY, YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF CAUSE I'M THE ONE WHO FUCKING WENT TROUGH ALL OF THIS FOR THIS MONTH! I'm not gonna listen to your fucking stoopid bullshit cause you wanna act like you know better. GO FUCK YOURSELF! GET THE FUCK OUT!
 
Lmao, nobody forgot anything. What are people supposed to do? Make the same redundant holier than thou comments every time they see me?
No I rather just talk shit to you. All in good fun.
"Kat has departed for work."

Is she on a special mission, Dave? WTF is this alien speak?
Phil and his alien speak is due to him trying to substitute words out using his robust cornucopia of vocabulary. To try and come off smarter. I find if you can explain it to some one like they are 5 years old everyone can understand except for Phil's chat.
 
We all know that Phil is lying about those "during the break behind-the-scenes" tips, but the way he does it is pretty obvious at this point. Example:

"Let me see if I received a tip behind-the-scenes... Ugh, there's a hundred emails here" *scrolls down infinitely in his phone*

That's impossible. If you just received a tip, why there's so many emails that came after it? He even mentioned some emails from tips that appeared during the prestream and appeared after the OneMinuteMan tip... Which means OneMinuteMan/Bobbajo/SilentBob usually tip way earlier in the day and he just sits on it.

Also, another thing he just said here "[...] I checked earlier for tips, but there was none."

So you do check for those way before you anounce it? When? He's such a slimy fuck, Jesus Christ...
I'll never wrap my head around an actual human dedicating around $1000 per month to give to Philip for this.
 
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That's bullshit, dood! When you spam the forum one more time with your nonsense, I'm gonna ban you. I'm tired of it. He is a moron who doesn't know what he's talking about. Cause you are just sitting here trying to derail the stream and try to contradict everything I'm saying. You can go fuck yourself! NO REALLY, YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF CAUSE I'M THE ONE WHO FUCKING WENT TROUGH ALL OF THIS FOR THIS MONTH! I'm not gonna listen to your fucking stoopid bullshit cause you wanna act like you know better. GO FUCK YOURSELF! GET THE FUCK OUT!
Just watched that clip regarding the subs shit and holy cow, did he memory hole the shit out of the september sub boom. It happened at the start, immediately after his psychonauts 2 freakout over the sub count and a certain someone made several socks just to become members to hit the goal.

Also he claims the reward was for him to spend money on more hats, when everyone just wants his nazi hat is dumb. Also if the plans fell through when the neckphones were delayed, why didn't he change it to something else? Smell's like a hasty attempt to rationalize not getting to spend more money. And speaking of spending more money, where was this money gonna come from? He has been holding up that he needs 300 a day just to survive and pay his bills (we and they know that's bullshit but just humor me), when was he going to make the money to buy more hats that may only be seen once? Yet another failed "pay the mortgage" begathon? Praying for another "tip war"?

The second goal almost made me sick. A "Viewer's choice" which he described as a "full length playthrough". This means that, BY HIS OWN FUCKING DEFINITION, he never fulfilled for Divinity. He fucking scammed his audience yet again.
 
The second goal almost made me sick. A "Viewer's choice" which he described as a "full length playthrough". This means that, BY HIS OWN FUCKING DEFINITION, he never fulfilled for Divinity. He fucking scammed his audience yet again.
I think secretly he still thinks of it like when he originally planned to play Persona 4, if it goes past a certain amount of time (4 weeks or 4 sessions I think it was at the time back then) he was gonna drop it and force the piggies to re-pay, which is why he got so pissed at Divinity.
 
These Yakuza games are soo trash.

His game voice is soo loud, you cant hear him talking atm. Not complaining btw.
As has often been repeated, the fault does not lie with the games. They definitely don't lend themselves well to streaming, but that isn't their fault. It's the streamer's fault for not bringing anything out of them. They're great to experience but the issue is that there isn't much fun in watching a tard trying to play. The best yakuza videos are of people who play with a lot of skill, like damageless runs or speedruns.

Phil has no skill, no unique insight to japanese culture or any ability to be invested in the world of the series. He has the unique ability to make all games look like utter dogshit just by being so bad at them.
 
Jarring how worse and worse Katherine looks.
Compare that image you posted to the wedding photo. She is letting herself go, fuck me that's awful.
Can't really expect anything else when she does fuck all, maybe works part time, doesn't cook, just orders food and plays vidya.

But let's compare because we're wankers.
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Her face was always unfortunate, but it's just getting worse. I can't help but chuckle when I remember Phil proudly saying "She has a rocking bod. She could be a swimsuit model!".
Also her bloody makeup is the fucking sometimes less is more meme.

I hope we see a wild Katherine sighting, it would be an insane amount of internet points.
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Makes me wonder what he will do when his parents die and he inherits something from them (if he inherits something my guess is that Melissa will inherit the majority. I assume this because she seems to be a more caring child then Phil ever was). Imagine he inherits a good sum from his parents. The first thing would most likely be "It's WWE champions time!" Or does any of you think he actually has put aside some money in a trust or something similar for retirement? I bet he will stream until he one day keels over on stream
If its material possessions, he will sell it off for money and then blow the money on gacha, gin, and otter pops. If it's just money he will blow it on gacha, gin, and otter pops.
 
Jarring how worse and worse Katherine looks.
Compare that image you posted to the wedding photo. She is letting herself go, fuck me that's awful.
Can't really expect anything else when she does fuck all, maybe works part time, doesn't cook, just orders food and plays vidya.

But let's compare because we're wankers.
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Her face was always unfortunate, but it's just getting worse. I can't help but chuckle when I remember Phil proudly saying "She has a rocking bod. She could be a swimsuit model!".
Also her bloody makeup is the fucking sometimes less is more meme.

I hope we see a wild Katherine sighting, it would be an insane amount of internet points.

Lord almighty I forgot that Katherine was already fat on the Halloween stream lmao. Wow. She’s definitely a grand bovine by now. Phil could take her around to some fairgrounds and possibly win some prize $$$.
 
These Yakuza games are soo trash.

His game voice is soo loud, you cant hear him talking atm. Not complaining btw.
They combine great combat with meh free roaming and minigames that are invariably hit or miss. Not just that. but nobody likes every minigame. I love bowling in 0, for example, but most people hate the fuck out of it because reliably getting strikes is a bitch and a half. Disco dancing can suck a fat one though. And trying to 100% them is a pain in the ass, starting with having to learn mahjong AND shogi. And if you're a streamer, of course, it's incredibly boring to watch you attempt to 100 karaoke songs. This is part of what makes Phil's Yakuza playthroughs unwatchable, how he poorly does every minigame but insists on sticking to them because at least it's not gameplay.

This is a smart design choice: They're designed to be beatable by anyone with half a brain. That includes da strokefaced killah, of course. The way he plays them is trash: plays on Normal when Legend is already far too easy, overgrinds the fuck out of his MC, chugs heals when in a pinch, and just mashes through combat. It works, but it's snore-inducing.

Now, the thing is Lost Judgment is a spectacularly easy game. Judgment Yagami had two styles, namely almost useless Crane and supremely busted Tiger. LJ Yagami has taken shape as a God of Death who is just unreasonably powerful. All his styles are broken now, which makes for a very fun and very spectacular game if the player is good... Or a toxic e beggar mashing square on crane and chugging heals because you might as well, it seems to beat everything.

Seriously. Kiryu used to have the famous tiger drop, an invincible counter that knocked enemies flat on their ass for a free followup. LJ Yagami has Crane Counter, a kick that's easier to trigger than Tiger Drop and knocks opponents... Into the air, for a free COMBO. Phil is unlikely to ever even use that, but it is very flashy. Yagami's style is mostly based around dodge and counter, so even if he's not strictly the most powerful Yakuza protagonist (Kiwami 2 Kiryu had near inescapable offense, Yakuza 4 Akiyama had a braindead infinite, Yakuza 5 Shinada had weapons for big brawls and literal death combos for bosses) he is by far the easiest to pilot.

Doesn't help that Phil quadruples down on the stalling, reading out every single line. His playthrough is just pointless and remarkably hard to follow for anyone. My advice is to just stay away. Literal children can easily beat this franchise on normal, and while the game can offer a great viewing experience, watching somebody play it on normal is a waste of time. There won't be any salt or significant difficulty spikes. Even the bosses are super easy.

If any of you undercover tractors wanna light a fire under his ass, tell him that you will not watch or support this playthrough, or any further Yakuza games unless he plays them on hard. Guy got off way too easy on his month of grinding followed by the mother of all bitchquits in Like A Dragon.
 
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Doesn't matter, :like: Khet's only purpose is to implant the image of a cherry pie baking with a flower in her hair wife to MATOOR pipe smoking professional pillar of society father phil reading the Washington Post Sundays while his son Jasper runs around in a propeller beanie on their white picket fence estate; into the heads of his audience. Her appearance or even the existence of an actual relationship is besides the point.

In fact its likely that Phil purposely arranged :like:Khet's disappearance from the public view to ward off a repeat of the Reanna disaster. All she needed to do is to appear a few times at the beginning to implant the idea of her existence in his paypigs mind then GTFO blaming the trolls for it of course. Then she becomes another fictional character in PiggyTales he could weave any story he wants for any purpose he wants. Like the hotshot legal team always advising him not to provide any evidence for his claims or the hot latina girls who want him. As a bonus any change of appearance would also become a nonissue.

Its actually a bit clever for phil.
 
Lord almighty I forgot that Katherine was already fat on the Halloween stream lmao. Wow. She’s definitely a grand bovine by now. Phil could take her around to some fairgrounds and possibly win some prize $$$.
It's been over 2 years since we've seen her. And she already put on weight by the wedding. Phil doesn't even bother posting his weird sneak up behind Catherine on a blank monitor pictures anymore. She's probably obese.
 
isn't vagitarian when you only eat pussy?

Depends when you were born. I noticed the idiot generation started misusing it a while ago. Used to be an insult to say a guy went down on a girl. That's submission, taking away your manhood! Not surprised there's a beta badge for doing it these days. I am very old though. According to Phillip. I'm in the same bracket as... ugh, DSP (39), Keemstar (39), ReviewTechUSA (40), ChrisChan (39), Kirsten Dunst (39) and Seth Rogan (39). What a depressing list to be on.

I guess there was some comedian or movie which tried to change the meaning in the 2000's and make being a vagitarian more socially acceptable? Can't change the meaning of words. If someone at work is ever stupid enough to ask me who I am, I'll always sound off about how gay I feel. They leave me alone.
 
In fact its likely that Phil purposely arranged :like:Khet's disappearance from the public view to ward off a repeat of the Reanna disaster. All she needed to do is to appear a few times at the beginning to implant the idea of her existence in his paypigs mind then GTFO blaming the trolls for it of course. Then she becomes another fictional character in PiggyTales he could weave any story he wants for any purpose he wants. Like the hotshot legal team always advising him not to provide any evidence for his claims or the hot latina girls who want him. As a bonus any change of appearance would also become a nonissue.

Its actually a bit clever for phil.
Both of them have their own reasons for being as apart as they possibly can when the camera is on.

In Phil's case, it's because the only things Phil fears most are things he cannot control. Leanna broke the pignosis and emasculated him during Nier, and no doubt he's leveraging that in that gin pickle he calls a brain as the basis behind keeping Kat out of his streams. He must have full control over absolutely everything in his streams. Having another independently functioning mind (even if severely low functioning, in Kat's case) within the gout gaming room would challenge Phil's complete control. He's so bitchmade nowadays that he cannot allow anything, or anyone, to go against his control.

In Kat's case, it's because she's also thin-skinned, mostly about her appearance, but also she has absolutely nothing to gain by being on Phil's streams. She can no longer stand the mere prospect of sitting in his sweat-marinated couch beside him, while his chat trolls (and regulars, for that matter, because they're all degenerate sex pests) talk about her in chat, right in her face, for a few hours. We've seen the streams where she did, and she couldn't even hide how miserable she was in those. That's not even a dig on her; I can't blame her for wanting to get the fuck out of there when she's mashed against that Polish blob and reading "Well look who clopped in! 🐴" in his chat. For what gain? There's no way in hell he directly gives her a dime from his tips as free spending money for appearing on camera with him. That's WWE Champions money, dead to rights, the moment he gets it.

Kat married Phil for the free room and board - that will always be my assumption as to why she married him. Since she's not getting anything extra in exchange for the torture that is being in his stream, that's never happening again. Plus Phil's never going to invite her back, because he wants to continue maintaining complete and uncontestable control over every single minute of his streams. It also totally stings his fragile ego when someone in the chat says no amount of makeup in the world can mask Kat's freakish face but they applaud her attempt anyway. She would have to show him some cash at the dinner table and say she's been a fan since the Metal Gear Solid playthroughs in order for him to ever let her back into the gout gaming room, and that is something she will never do.
 
Isn't that partially Phil's fault? I mean when she moved in with him she went to the Gym and then allegedly Phil wanted her to stop going to the gym. then he botched the exercise bike and pocketed the money for himself. So if she is now balloning it's his fault. Maybe he was afraid of the Jim or Tyrone fearing getting cucked again.
Phil’s parents with the sneak diss at Kat, getting her an exercise bike for her birthday :story:

Do you think it broke under her massive girth and Phil had to lie to save face?:stress:
 
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