Shit that you overheard during Thanksgiving (2021)

[Haruhi Suzumiya]

Thanksgiving was last month you mongoloids.

This, but if you really want a story, null.
I overheard my sister say that she looked into her ex-husbands bank account (they had two accounts under one account or something from when they were still together) and she saw he was buying stuff for his new girl, had to message him and tell him to change his bank password since I'm actually still on good terms with the ex-husband, She cheated on him first and had another guys kid. bros before hoes i guess?

 

[Goyslop Muncher]

I celebrated it yesterday with my family. It was fine, I cooked a ham, turkey breast, secret turkey sauce, and mashed potatoes. Catered from a local diner corn pudding, stuffing, Cranberry sauce. Also bought two pies pecan and blackberry.
Everybody got drunk except my dad and I. Amazingly, politics was barely spoken.

 

[Freya]

In Soviet Russia Thanksgiving has you.

I've never seen a community try harder to be quirky than this one

 

[AngryTreeRat]

Thanksgiving was last month because Canuck. I got in an argument with my fag aunt over not letting fags and troons off the hook for being pedoes just because they are fags and troons, knocked out her fag girlfriend after she talked shit about my dead mother to my grandmother making her cry and tried to swing at me after I told her to shut the fuck up and leave the house, and then had a nice chat with my grandmother about how the world was less angry before the coof. I also had a boxing match with my sister over the last slice of pie because settling pie disputes demands they be settled through combat, we actually put gloves on for that one, it was fun. Neither of us box, but glovers are around from when we fought when we were younger and our parents wanted us to be safer about it.

 

[Five or Six Stores]

Places that don't celebrate thanksgiving can hardly be called "countries".

 

[Ira the Weatherman]

I gave thanks that I wasn't born an Am*rican or, even worse, a leaf.

 

[King Kiwi]

You ever just peruse for some good, old Thanksgiving aesthetics; nice turkey, mashed potatoers, pie...just something to get you in the mood?
And then you're seeing pictures of teary-eyed turkeys snogging and groping native Americans.

 

[♦️ King of Diamonds ♦️]

dutchmen don't know how delicious it is to pour gravy down your facehole while Uncle Ted talks about politics and jesus and the nazis

I AM Uncle Ted!

Tremble before me and my memorized statistics about the overrepresentation of Jews in the American Media and Financial Industries! Now please pass the pumpkin pie!

 

[Five or Six Stores]

Thanksgiving was last month because Canuck. I got in an argument with my fag aunt over not letting fags and troons off the hook for being pedoes just because they are fags and troons, knocked out her fag girlfriend after she talked shit about my dead mother to my grandmother making her cry and tried to swing at me after I told her to shut the fuck up and leave the house, and then had a nice chat with my grandmother about how the world was less angry before the coof. I also had a boxing match with my sister over the last slice of pie because settling pie disputes demands they be settled through combat, we actually put gloves on for that one, it was fun. Neither of us box, but glovers are around from when we fought when we were younger and our parents wanted us to be safer about it.

Wow, you sound insufferable. Sorry your roastie mom couldn't raise you better

 

[thegooddoctor]

I’m a British so This doesn’t concern me in the least, have fun with your racist holiday you land thieves!!

 

[Hamilton Burger]

i'm thankful for the misery of everyone pretending they don't love fried turkey b/c you do like it and you wish you had it today but you don't

 

[CreamyHerman’s]

I slapped my balls pretty hard on my desk today

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

It got political (not me I swear I kept my mouth shut). Smarter people (men) calmed it down because the progressive women were getting too upset at the conservative women. My grandpa took me aside. Hand on my shoulder, breath smelling like whiskey, clearly blackout drunk at 6 pm, "Anon, I don't like the jews..."
Never felt so close to him. We had a good time.
edit: sorry for confusion, this is last year, im sure this year will go better since rittenhouse and waukesha.

 

[A Series Of Tubes]

My leftist soyboy brother, and his walking real life incarnation of the "mommy" femjak wife, and the daughter that isn't even his kid, are coming over for dessert after they go to their fellow leftist friend for an all vegan thanksgiving. I'm staying far away. Don't need to hear about how I'm Satan for owning a car that isn't an IPhone on wheels.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

i'm thankful for the misery of everyone pretending they don't love fried turkey b/c you do like it and you wish you had it today but you don't

Deep-fried turkey is delicious.

 

[Null]

What is it with american families and being so absolutely broken?
I mean, I disagree with lots of family on lots of stuff but we acknowledge that family is more important and we don't start annoying others over it.

People really overplay it when they complain online, but one thing I've noticed being around overseas families is that talking about politics is like talking about your bowel movements, in that even around family it's inappropriate. Like people will apologize if they even bring up the topic of voting. It's very different from the US where people put signs in their yard and bumpersticks on their cars.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

People really overplay it when they complain online, but one thing I've noticed being around overseas families is that talking about politics is like talking about your bowel movements, in that even around family it's inappropriate. Like people will apologize if they even bring up the topic of voting. It's very different from the US where people put signs in their yard and bumpersticks on their cars.

Pussy euro faggots cant handle getting owned over dinner? Couldn't be me lol

 

[Angry Shoes]

It got political (not me I swear I kept my mouth shut). Smarter people (men) calmed it down because the progressive women were getting too upset at the conservative women. My grandpa took me aside. Hand on my shoulder, breath smelling like whiskey, clearly blackout drunk at 6 pm, "Anon, I don't like the jews..."
Never felt so close to him. We had a good time.
edit: sorry for confusion, this is last year, im sure this year will go better since rittenhouse and waukesha.

And then everyone clapped

 

[TurdFondler]

I’m a British [...]you land thieves!!

Britain doesn't bother teaching history anymore huh

 

[sweetstone]

I'm baking a giant ham because that's all I care about regarding Thanksgiving.