DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Nigel of Ukip]

More Boomer Adventures from piggy. He thinks driving his horsebitch 5 minutes to work deserves an Indiana Jones' style retelling of the story.

You know he will do it mate. He will have some Homer's Odyssey like story, this bloody epic tale. Oh how it was such a big deal, how everyone was stupid, the traffic was insane, somehow he was wronged or in danger, everyone was wrong and of course Philip in Achile's fashion was the hero who returned victoriously. Do note, he put himself in this situation, and is as stupid as everyone else.
He will play it up, make half of it up and it will be something like the Amazon story. I can't blame him honestly, he's a boring cunt that lives a boring life. The most minor common thing can happen to him and it's a big deal.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Has anyone checked to see if he's logged into champions?

 

[Pandalee’s Tits]

So I read a bit of the pages and how @Iron Hamster believes Phil's mom lives with him now.

It's probably so. I'm not fully convinced, but I can bet that it's true and Kat has left his ass.

The Face Time lie was such bullshit. Your parents can't click on the phone button and see the video option?

Also I believe if his mother is living with him and not working you get a deductible on taxes don't you for taking care of a dependent ?

That'd be a crazy new arc.

We don’t deserve this tbh. This would be just too magical.

 

[Sup3r]

You know he will do it mate. He will have some Homer's Odyssey like story. Oh how it was such a big deal, how everyone was stupid, the traffic was insane, everyone was wrong and of course Philip in Achile's fashion was the hero who returned victoriously. Do note, he put himself in this situation, and is as stupid as everyone else.
He will play it up, make half of it up and it will be something like the Amazon story. I can't blame him honestly, he's a boring cunt that lives a boring life. The most minor common thing can happen to him and it's a big deal.

It's bizarre that he decided to pull this when it wasn't a thing years ago. There no reason for him to do this, it's not like someone's going to steal it just because it's black Friday. Most of the madness, if there is any, will be inside the shop meaning that the horse is in much greater "danger" (by his standards) than the car is.

The only explanations at this point are paranoia or just not wanting to work himself. Either way it's just pathetic.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

You know he will do it mate. He will have some Homer's Odyssey like story. Oh how it was such a big deal, how everyone was stupid, the traffic was insane, everyone was wrong and of course Philip in Achile's fashion was the hero who returned victoriously. Do note, he put himself in this situation, and is as stupid as everyone else.
He will play it up, make half of it up and it will be something like the Amazon story. I can't blame him honestly, he's a boring cunt that lives a boring life. The most minor common thing can happen to him and it's a big deal.

Which is the real reason we refute his claims of happiness: he makes it easy. Phil has demonstrated quite powerfully that he is NOT one to be satisfied with mediocrity. I will never believe in a million years that he doesn't wish things had been different. He wishes he hadn't been eliminated by Tokido at EVO 2005, hadn't lost his AdSense, hadn't gotten tossed from Machinima, hadn't lost Leanna, hadn't lost all the money he used to make on YouTube, hadn't been de-partnered on Twitch, hadn't lost all his fans, the list goes on forever.

Phil's life today is absent of so many things we know he wishes he could have without any downsides, and his drinking proves that it bothers him. Nobody who is happy stays up until 3am geting hammered, posting stupid shit on Twitter, and playing a predatory mobile game. Nobody who is happy lives like a fucking hermit while broadcasting themselves six days a week, making mountains out of pebbles.

FFS, Phil couldn't spill a small quantity of water on himself without running to show his mom. That's not somebody who has anything going in life, or is happy about the lack of those things.

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

It's bizarre that he decided to pull this when it wasn't a thing years ago. There no reason for him to do this, it's not like someone's going to steal it just because it's black Friday. Most of the madness, if there is any, will be inside the shop meaning that the horse is in much greater "danger" (by his standards) than the car is.

The only explanations at this point are paranoia or just not wanting to work himself. Either way it's just pathetic.

I think something else is up mate, maybe he himself is shopping. I don't know and I don't want to guess, however I don't believe his story at all. Surely he is simply using this as an excuse to cover up something else.

 

[verymuchawful]

I don't think I've ever seen any other streamer regularly subject their viewers to breaks like this. Most sane streamers would just say they'll be back in a few hours and end their stream. But Dave is so hard locked into this routine that doing that would be terrifying.

 

[PieceofShet]

I think something else is up mate, maybe he himself is shopping. I don't know and I don't want to guess, however I don't believe his story at all. Surely he is simply using this as an excuse to cover up something else.

So what...

Everytime she goes to work, she takes the car. When she finishes, she drives it back.

Today dsp had to drive her there and then back so... ? I dont get the logic. Its not like he is gonna need it while she works.

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

So what...

Everytime she goes to work, she takes the car. When she finishes, she drives it back.

Today dsp had to drive her there and then back so... ? I dont get the logic. Its not like he is gonna need it while she works.

I've read some people claimed he said he's worried about the car getting damaged, which fair game I guess but it doesn't explain the insanely long break.
There is no way he is sitting in traffic for an hour and something when he's driving about top ten minutes in each way. He's absolutely doing something else. I refuse to believe this bollocks.

Edit: I would not be shocked if this cunt is shopping and gets something only to claim it was gifted in a few days.

 

[KKKrèmebrûlée]

"Still on the road and not event close to home yet..... lol" (from twitter). So it's wwe champions time or he is shopping. Because a 1mi round trip doesn't take an 1hr20mins

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

My mentally ill conspiracy theory is that this is just an obvious excuse for him to do as little "work" as possible today. He's probably been laying on his bed all this time playing WWE Champs and sipping gin.

 

[San Dimas High School]

His chat's scrolling faster than when he's streaming though. And he's still getting tips.

 

[NursezillaX]

Phil: The parking lot was PACKED, I mean literally every space was full. I said, I don't know what you would have done if you had driven today, I don't know how you would have managed!!

Goddamn this dude is fucking dumb haha. Just further shows what a shit, shit employee he'd be. 'Uh, boss? The lot is full, I really can't manage, so I'm not gonna be in today.'

Edit: It could be totally different where he is, but I work a part-time retail job a few hours a week at a local comic shop, and shopping was really not that bad today. We had a storewide sale and are in a huge plaza with some really big name stores as well. I think his 90 minute story is probably total bullshit, he just needs to make every little mundane thing in his life into something epic in scope otherwise he'd literally have zero to talk about.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

I don't think I've ever seen any other streamer regularly subject their viewers to breaks like this. Most sane streamers would just say they'll be back in a few hours and end their stream. But Dave is so hard locked into this routine that doing that would be terrifying.

Based on him addressing the schedule recently, that isn't it. He clearly goes on break after the pre-stream because he just simply doesn't want to jump right into gameplay after he grandstands for two hours, the thing he actually wants to do. He also likes to spite his viewers because he hates them and they'll put up with it.

So what...

Everytime she goes to work, she takes the car. When she finishes, she drives it back.

Today dsp had to drive her there and then back so... ? I dont get the logic. Its not like he is gonna need it while she works.

I see two possibilities: Phil is out by himself to go do something else entirely and is making up a cover story, or he's driving his mom somewhere. Which is basically the same thing, but with very different implications.

He doesn't come up with bullshit without any prompting. Something specific has to give him the idea, like when his paypigs asked about the vest from an old video of his and now here we are with a full muppet show. Or when an event is coming up that is going to cost a lot more money than usual in Champions and he obviously never has it until the day before. So he isn't just sitting at home right now, laughing about lying to his chat. Or even making up an excuse to go out and have an adventure to talk about later. If Phil was capable of that, he would have a lot more stories to share.

His demeanor will tell us more than his words will.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

So I read a bit of the pages and how @Iron Hamster believes Phil's mom lives with him now.

It's probably so. I'm not fully convinced, but I can bet that it's true and Kat has left his ass.

The Face Time lie was such bullshit. Your parents can't click on the phone button and see the video option?

Also I believe if his mother is living with him and not working you get a deductible on taxes don't you for taking care of a dependent ?

That'd be a crazy new arc.

When Phil got upset he heard vacuuming outside duh office door, I suspected that was his mother because he ranted like he should have known better to make noise when Phil is conducting business but said nothing to her, which I felt was out of place because lol @ Catherine doing a thing in that house because Phil really wishes he had that soulmaid. It also was when Phil first started doing the Kat = Mom mentions he's done over 10 times now.

 

[PieceofShet]

Thats a good fuckin point.

 

[Sup3r]

I don't think I've ever seen any other streamer regularly subject their viewers to breaks like this. Most sane streamers would just say they'll be back in a few hours and end their stream. But Dave is so hard locked into this routine that doing that would be terrifying.

It isn't even like it's an emergency. He's been planning on doing this for over a week, he easily could've made his schedule so he could fit in in without interrupting the stream, or even cancelling it because he's done that for less.

His jokey tweet shows that he thought that it was going to be busy, any normal person would've planned the streams around when they got back, better yet they wouldn't have put themselves into this fucking stupid scenario to begin with.

His chat's scrolling faster than when he's streaming though. And he's still getting tips.

Just goes to show that his paypigs give zero shits about the games he plays because they pay when he isn't there. If he wants to become a just chatting streamer he should, it won't have an effect on his bottom line and he'd at least not have to play another "shitty" game and risk his meager ad revenue to content ID.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Phil: The parking lot was PACKED, I mean literally every space was full. I said, I don't know what you would have done if you had driven today, I don't know how you would have managed!!

Goddamn this dude is fucking dumb haha. Just further shows what a shit, shit employee he'd be. 'Uh, boss? The lot is full, I really can't manage, so I'm not gonna be in today.'

Edit: It could be totally different where he is, but I work a part-time retail job a few hours a week at a local comic shop, and shopping was really not that bad today. We had a storewide sale and are in a huge plaza with some really big name stores as well. I think his 90 minute story is probably total bullshit, he just needs to make every little mundane thing in his life into something epic in scope otherwise he'd literally have zero to talk about.

Many people haven't physically Black Friday shopped in years.

 

[verymuchawful]

I like the premise that not only every parking spot was taken, but waiting for someone to leave not being an option. Nothing I could do! Then Dave would have a ridiculous story that Kat missed work today because she couldn't find a parking spot at her jahb.

 

[Iron Hamster]

I eagerly await the car 'accident' story where it totally burns the other side of his face so they match.