Orbiter Phil’s Weird Body... - Like, WTF? I’ve never seen anything like it.

I hate Phil's mouth. It makes me irrationally angry.
mouth.jpgmouth2.jpgmouth3.jpg
 
Phil could draw a goatee on his face with a marker and it would look better than that embarrassing excuse for facial hair.

Seriously, I'll bet even Young Phil would look at those screenshots and be utterly bewildered at where the fuck his beard went. The reason HAS to be his lack of testosterone, because it's worse than the top of his head, and that is not normal. Men typically get hairier elsewhere as they age, even when their head is balding, and the state of Phil's face has me thinking he looks way less like an orangutan than Young Phil did.
 
At this point, I don't want to see the state of his face under those pubes he calls his facial hair.
I have a morbid desire to see it. I imagine he doesn't wash that flap of skin between his chins and it's filled with disgusting gunk.
He weirdly reminds me of a rodent in this one. You ever crinkle a bag in front of a guinea pig or hamster and see how quickly they come begging for food, their beady eyes bulging out as they repeately squeal and make noise at the thought of food.

Same mentality for pigroach except instead of petfood it is a whale's wallet.
 
He weirdly reminds me of a rodent in this one. You ever crinkle a bag in front of a guinea pig or hamster and see how quickly they come begging for food, their beady eyes bulging out as they repeately squeal and make noise at the thought of food.

Same mentality for pigroach except instead of petfood it is a whale's wallet.
Given his weekly day off ritual, we can add actual food to that one, because I swear it's like he can hear the sound of junk food being stocked and it's calling to him just as much Champions does while he's streaming. Would explain a lot.
 
Given his weekly day off ritual, we can add actual food to that one, because I swear it's like he can hear the sound of junk food being stocked and it's calling to him just as much Champions does while he's streaming. Would explain a lot.
I wonder if he checks on his soul maid when she coems home not because she is back from a grueling four hour shift but because she might have brought some food for him to DEVOUR.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Big Brown Schlub
I wonder if he checks on his soul maid when she coems home not because she is back from a grueling four hour shift but because she might have brought some food for him to DEVOUR.
If his frequent use of the word "mom" is anything go off of, that's exactly what he does, because that's such a kid thing to do: coming running to the front door when their mother gets home thinking she has McDonald's or Pizza Hut.

Never forget the myriad of ways in which Phil is still a child. Dude can't even enjoy Christmas because he's a forty year-old man now and so there isn't anyone leaving all kinds of shiny presents under a tree for him to tear the wrapping off of, nor would he be able to enjoy watching his own kids do that if he had any. He's like the Grinch, except with a different ending no one is going to enjoy watching.
 
If his frequent use of the word "mom" is anything go off of, that's exactly what he does, because that's such a kid thing to do: coming running to the front door when their mother gets home thinking she has McDonald's or Pizza Hut.

Never forget the myriad of ways in which Phil is still a child. Dude can't even enjoy Christmas because he's a forty year-old man now and so there isn't anyone leaving all kinds of shiny presents under a tree for him to tear the wrapping off of, nor would he be able to enjoy watching his own kids do that if he had any. He's like the Grinch, except with a different ending no one is going to enjoy watching.
I doubt he falls for the delusions he uses on those affected by severe pignosis either, meaning he is well aware how fucked he is when he inevitably can'tt beg to sustain his lifestyle.
 
I doubt he falls for the delusions he uses on those affected by severe pignosis either, meaning he is well aware how fucked he is when he inevitably can'tt beg to sustain his lifestyle.
It's gone on long enough to a point that it's become completely normal to use these moments of desperation to get a point across, anyone who's called him out for being a bit too greedy is immediately sent to ban world, Phil doesn't see a problem in his behavior now, that's the thing. Maybe three years ago (or even pre vest streak if you want to push it) he was knowhere near as greedy as he is now, the only times we saw that was during the emergency tax situations. Phil without his twitch income is a night and day difference.

Even if you disregard the fact that he does shamelessly beg, he is genuinely pissed off and annoyed whenever he doesn't recieve enough money via tipping, and keep in mind he's constantly making sources of revenue whilst streaming (the ad revenue from his videos and people who decide to super chat, plus you got his Patreon as well).
 
I'm amazed he hasn't had more overall health issues that being said youth can certainly compensate for a ton I'm curious how well he will hold together in his 40s
 
  • Like
Reactions: HOMO FOR LIFE
Phil is the first person I've ever seen where his 2 front teeth are set in further back than the teeth beside them.View attachment 2803118

It's actually quite common, as you get older your teeth shift subtly, especially if your teeth are malformed or aren't the correct size to fill out the space allotted to them. My teeth have done so and has caused slight recession of my gums. If left untreated, even slightly receded gums can lead to a number of different oral diseases. If Phil spent even one day at the dentist he could solve this. You can get teeth correcting devices delivered to your house if you really gave a shit.

Chock up another one to Phil's robust Polish genetics.
 
Back