Ethan Ralph the Food Connoisseur (and fashion expert) - Discuss gunt's food choices and shitty merch -- Surprise! The fat pig consumes a lot of food.

[Puck]

Beef + horse + pointing = An excellent meal, thank you
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I guess Ralph has already given up on weight loss lol

 

[MeltyTW]

For all the Soprano worship Ralph partakes in he is the slob that Tony Soprano would spit on for wearing a ball cap and dressing like a wigger.

He just ignores every little decent or even arguably decent thing about any idea set of masculinity. He's a mismatch of the worst mental masculine traits as well as physical

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

He just ignores every little decent or even arguably decent thing about any idea set of masculinity. He's a mismatch of the worst mental masculine traits as well as physical

Ralph is just an all talk, no action loser. He spouts his trad Christ is King BS while having two illegitimate kids, living in sin, drinking and gambling daily. He spouts off about old school masculinity while being a white trash t-shirts and gym shorts wearing slob and making his living being a drunk fool e-begging donations and asking strangers to pay for his legal fund for a son he paper aborted.

He’s just an empty shell who tries to poorly imitate “real men” he’s seen as portrayed on TV and movies. Real traditional, respectable men (or women for that matter) might as well be super heroes for Ralph. Ralph has as much chance of hanging out with Superman as he does a legitimately respectable or powerful man.

 

[Haint]

What kind of dog did he and Pantsu get? It’s not a good idea to get a new dog right before you are about to have a baby but what do you expect from a white trash family.

Depends on the dog. But expect white trash to not know how to pick a good dog

 

[Terrorist]

The beef-slabs are healthier eating than what he was doing before, which was mostly drinking his calories (and unlike most alkies he didn't lose weight doing this, which is a testament to how much he was drinking and how unhealthy Makers is).

 

[AncientPhosphur]

This is art. Ralph somehow managed to be greasier and more disheveled than the burger he’s eating.

 

[Desktop User2]

Another $100 steak at least, plus 2 $16 sides (meant to be shared).
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At these prices, I reckon they could at least try something different at Robuchon´s turist trap... you are going to get swindled anyway, at least do it in a less wigger, more adventurous fashion.

Edit: nevermind, it has a dress code.

 

[Fannyscum]

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Doesn't look too bad but Neigh confirms it's inedible garbage. I'm guessing she undercooked the chicken or messed up the packet of mac 'n cheese somehow. Also good that she's supporting his weightloss challenge, though I figure they've both resigned themselves to the fact that he's going to prison so he can lose weight there.


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Needs more Soyjack pointing

 

[Jeff Gerstmann]

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Doesn't look too bad but Neigh confirms it's inedible garbage. I'm guessing she undercooked the chicken or messed up the packet of mac 'n cheese somehow. Also good that she's supporting his weightloss challenge, though I figure they've both resigned themselves to the fact that he's going to prison so he can lose weight there.
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Needs more Soyjack pointing

Yeah I'm guessing she fucked it up and the chicken is pink inside. It's a beginner's problem with fried chicken. The outside cooks so fast but their internal temp is way off.

 

[Not a fake name]

Yeah I'm guessing she fucked it up and the chicken is pink inside. It's a beginner's problem with fried chicken. The outside cooks so fast but their internal temp is way off.

You always finish it in the oven.
Fry to golden brown
Bake to temperature in oven.
Perfect chicken.

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

Maybe Pntsu is trying to kill Ralph with food poisoning via undercooked chicken.

 

[Eggg]

For all the Soprano worship

He's just like Tony Soprano! except instead of having a panic attack from cold cuts of meat, it's the thought of returning home to his horse wife.

 

[MeltyTW]

Doesn't look too bad but Neigh confirms it's inedible garbage. I'm guessing she undercooked the chicken or messed up the packet of mac 'n cheese somehow. Also good that she's supporting his weightloss challenge, though I figure they've both resigned themselves to the fact that he's going to prison so he can lose weight there.

its definitely pink inside i can tell from all the times ive fucked up chicken lol

 

[David Spadem]

 

[Harshed Mellow]

You always finish it in the oven.
Fry to golden brown
Bake to temperature in oven.
Perfect chicken.

I knew a lady that would microwave the chicken a little before breading and frying it. Madness.

 

[Lobster Cult High Priest]

its definitely pink inside i can tell from all the times ive fucked up chicken lol

At least you aren’t posting on a Twitter account claiming to be trad

 

[MeltyTW]

At least you aren’t posting on a Twitter account claiming to be trad

I didnt have the brilliant idea to use lemon wheels to cover up the salmonella though lol

 

[InwardsStink]

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Did she use the macaroni as an ashtray? Is smoking okay for horses while pregnant?

 

[Grotesque Bushes]

You always finish it in the oven.
Fry to golden brown
Bake to temperature in oven.
Perfect chicken.

I've never deep fried anything so I defer to your judgement on this, but even just resting meat lets you avoid the pink chicken problem. Don't absolutely nuke it, don't serve it while it's still the temperature of volcanic rock, and you'll likely be good.

 

[Retink]

Everything Ralph eats just looks unpleasant and bland, even the turkey sandwich looks like something you'd get at a convenience store. The horse has much better taste when it comes to the meals she's buying.