I am usually too grossed out to actually watch this show but I watched several of the more recent clips tonight and I was surprised to find myself annoyed on Tammy’s behalf. She’s a brat, no doubt, but here’s what’s fucked up:
Her family does gang up on her, which I’m sure has always been their family dynamic. Has it literally ever worked or helped Tammy? No. They do it because it’s familiar (and in Amy and her brother’s cases, makes them feel better about themselves).
But this confrontational approach is part of the problem.
Of course in the face of being outnumbered, Amy withdraws and gets defensive. Duh. Nothing is more predictable. Yet they deserve their share of responsibility for continuing to engage in this broken approach to communica
Based on earlier interactions between the siblings, it seems like the “united front” strategy is new. Normally we’ve just seen Amy visit Tammy, or just Misty, or just Chris and his wife, etc., and she flames out and shuts down one on one too.
There was a telling interaction, I think, last season when Chris was first introduced. He came onscreen making a big deal over how now that he’s involved, he’s going to hold Tammy accountable in ways
Amy and her other enablers never did because he’s Tough and Will Make Her Accountable. Several weeks later, he’s driving Tammy somewhere and is baffled and frustrated that she has gained more weight despite his frequent check-ins and support. Tammy says it’s not her fault,
Amy (who is still her daily caretaker) is forcing her to eat restricted foods. Chris immediately calls up Amy and yells at her, and Amy cries and says “yes I buy all her groceries, I buy mostly healthy, but if I don’t buy what Tammy wants too she blows up & threatens to call the cops for stealing her money” and Chris hangs up and is kind of quiet for a minute, realizing, probably, that this is more work than he thought.
The thing with Tammy is that any friendly relationship she has inevitably dies when they try to set boundaries with her; she becomes both agressive and defensive in response to ANY guidance, no matter how kindly given, and she is always calling up / gossiping with some third party about how much X Sucks and Is Making Me Fat (or, if they aren’t enabling her, how they Make Her Cry instead). This happened with Amy/Chris, Amy/Tisa, Tisa/Amy, Misty/Amy, [any sibling]/[her boyfriend of the month], etc.
The siblings may have finally caught on and realized that they need to both have each other’s backs in managing Tammy — or that they can’t believe what Tammy is saying so all want to be there in person when she’s talking so she can’t spin the event in the retelling to be something it’s not.
Or strategy is too generous a word and TLC just wants to film a white trash clown car and tells them all to show up at once now, who knows.
