Horrorcow Zoe Quinn / Chelsea Van Valkenburg / Locke Valentine / @UnburntWitch / @Primeape / CrashOverride / Hat Box / Old Uncle Anime - Con Artist, Abuser, Sexual Harasser, Drove Alec Holowka to Suicide.

THIS SUMMER COME THE BLOCKBUSTER FILM OF A LIFETIME.
CRASH OVERDRIVE WILL HAVE MISOGYNISTIC MECHA AND MRAS FIGHTING ZOE AND FRIENDS.

AT THE END OF THE MOVIE THEY WILL FIGHT JACE AND HE WILL SAY THIS TO THEM "FIGHT ME YOU LITTLE FAGGOTS!!!"

This is my script for this movie :^).
 
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Zoe Quinn, the woman who used her vagina as a bargaining chip and then lied about it - of course she deserves a film adaptation! Using her plight, we can send the message to ambitious young women that if they create a mediocre product and then cry in the face of criticism that makes them brave, honorable individuals who can share a pedestal alongside people such as Agatha Christie, Ada Lovelace and Marie Curie.
 
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Spellskite said:
So how will it end? I mean, Zoe didn't exactly accomplish anything particularly inspirational. Will the climax of the movie be Zoe looking sad, and then checking her bank account and getting cheered up?
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The movie will turn out to be a snuff film; they'll have murdered Jan Rankowski and will mount his head on the wall.
 
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ChuckSlaughter said:
I really enjoy kiwi scriptwriting everyone please continue
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I managed to get my hands on a leaked portion of the script. Don't ask how, I have connections.

[SCENE: A hipster coffee shop. Zoe sits at a small table, browsing Twitter on her laptop]

[We get a view of the laptop screen. Suddenly, Zoe is notified of a Tweet that links her to a 4chan thread about her game. We get a reaction of shoot of Zoe looking horrified at the implications of having a thread about her on a website populated entirely by autistic shitposting Neo-Nazis. Bravely, Zoe decides to click the link, selflessly disregarding her own personal safety to discover the truth.]

4CHAN POSTER:
How is this even a game lol

4CHAN POSTER 2:
This is just embarrassingly bad.

4CHAN POSTER 3:
How did she even make this? Isn't she supposed to be in the kitchen?

[Zoe slams her laptop shut with great force, beginning to hyperventilate. A few curious coffee shop patrons look her way. Zoe tries to calm down, but it's too late. The nefarious 4channers have triggered her, and there's no going back. Zoe tries to scream before clutching at her throat, the sounds of her hyperventilating growing louder. She desperately tries to reach out to the people at a nearby table for help, but falls to her knees before she can make it. She rolls around on the floor in a blind panic while people in the shop frantically try to help her. Someone pulls out their cell phone.]

PERSON ON CELL PHONE:
Hello, 911? Please hurry! Something terrible has happened!

[The camera pans to two people sitting at a corner table, watching the confusion unfold.]

COFFEE SHOP PATRON 1:
What's happening to that girl?

COFFEE SHOP PATRON 2:
She's been triggered. I've seen it before. I can't even imagine what horrible things she must have seen to provoke that kind of reaction...

COFFEE SHOP PATRON 1:
Poor thing...

[The camera gives a bird's-eye view of Zoe thrashing on the floor while people try to hold her down. As the sound of sirens emerge in the background, the screen fades to black.]
 
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I'm betting the movie will just not come out. Like I said in chat, many more implausible film plots have been proposed (like the Burger King movie), so it wouldn't be surprising if Pointless Nerd Drama MCCCXXXVII get canned.

If it does happen, then it will probably involve one of three things:

- A generally white-washed and overdramatized "Very Roughly Based After a True Story" in which a Zoe stand-in is faced with real IRL goons who hate her for being a video game developer. It will be very similar to the Law & Order: SVU episode except even more ridiculous. It's thrashed by critics and ignored by SJWs. Zoe does her best to distance from it.

- A drama film not unlike The Social Network, but with stand-ins to avoid libel suits. SJWs hate it for not being critical enough, everyone else hates it, ignores it or finds it really really boring. This "everyone hates it" idea would be an extreme version of what happened with W., which conservatives ignored and liberals thought was too sympathetic.

- A half-decent film that portrays everyone as having somewhat sympathetic/jerk tendencies. It doesn't take away the core of it being all Internet-based, so it's also extremely boring. SJWs absolutely hate it, but no one else cares.
 
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Xarpho said:
This "everyone hates it" idea would be an extreme version of what happened with W., which conservatives ignored and liberals thought was too sympathetic.
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I liked W in and an alternate universe somewhere instead of becoming president me and W become party buddies and spend the 2000s doing lots of blow while al gore brings us clean air and 1gbps internet that goes all the way from san francisco to kinasa
 
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Xarpho said:
A half-decent film that portrays everyone as having somewhat sympathetic/jerk tendencies. It doesn't take away the core of it being all Internet-based, so it's also extremely boring. SJWs absolutely hate it, but no one else cares.
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Not going to happen. Quinn's entire career, even before Gamergate broke, was entirely centered on her own personal victimhood. She is, in most respects, like Wu: She has nothing but victimhood in her quiver, has accomplished absolutely nothing of substance or note, and has nothing of remote value in her portfolio. She's a known abusive spouse, she engaged in legal warfare to try gag her ex (only to vacate said order, meaning she did so entirely under false pretenses) from speaking out about his abuse, and she was a perfect symptom of the larger disease that was this Bay Area clique faggotry that overran the indie circuit.

She's a fucking sociopath, and she knows she can't win the battle of public opinion unless the odds are stacked in her favor and the other side gets no say. She will not be able to tolerate GG even being allowed to speak, because her fucking own platform is that flimsy and filled with bullshit.

If she has any say in this whatsoever, #3 will not happen.
 
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Leaked trailer transcript. Don't ask me how I got this.

Evil has made its move.
They wish nothing but chaos and destruction.
Earth is their playground. Anyone is a target.
*shotgun cocking sound*
Their mistake was "anyone" including her.
THIS SUMMER
*Quinn blows an evil troll's head off*
THE GATE OPENS
*GG Leader: Ve are GamerGate! Zis is our demand: surrender all of ze planet to us, or ve vill execute zese transzexual game devs, live to ze whole vorld!*
*GG Troops: Heil!*
AND THEY'LL DO ANYTHING
*McIntosh: We have joined together to stop these madmen!*
*Wu: EAT FUCKING SEEKER MISSILES YOU FUCKING CIS SCUMBAGS!
TO CLOSE IT SHUT
*Butts: Jace Connors, the Gaters' most dangerous operative. He's going after Brianna.*
*Quinn: I'll chomp 'im like a cigar.
WITH LEAD
*Chu: Mangina Squad ready to report, ma'am!*
*Quinn: The UN has to listen. I'll make them listen.*
CHOOSE YOUR SIDE
*GG Leader: Your game vas garbage! How long are you going to keep zis up?!*
*Quinn: Let's see how much you like harassing successful innocent indie game devs with all your teeth gone and a bullet in the dick.*
JUSTICE ... OR GATE?
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Halberd Sonichu said:
May i suggest that Danny Devito play Zoe's cunt. as we all known she will chow down on some good Five Guy's Burger and Fries. so they need to make it look right for the film and i believe would Danny do the role justice.
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You know if they need some production cash they could always offer to give 5 guys some product placement
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Cosmos said:
It's actually happened before; the example that comes to mind is Jurassic Park. From Wikipedia:



But then again, it doesn't actually say how far along Michael Crichton was in writing Jurassic Park. It could have even been finished, just not published yet. So I'm not sure how common it is to buy a property that doesn't technically exist yet. If it has happened, I'm assuming that the non-existent property was created by someone who already has a great track record for producing hits.
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Jurassic Park was published that very same year (or the year after), FYI.
 
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