DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Derich 2nd of coomland]

What else was he going to do while being driven cross-country to tournaments?

Sleep.
Complain.
Eat.
Look lovingly at Rambo and wish he had the courage to come out of the closet.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

I love lolcow bookshelf shots. Let's see what Phil reads:

Dan Brown - Angels and Demons
Dan Brown - Deception Point
J.R.R. Tolkien - Lord of the Rings
Brian Jacques - Redwall
Brian Jacques - Castaways of the Flying Dutchman
Brian Jacques - Mossflower
Brian Jacques - Salamandastron
Brad Meltzer - The Tenth Justice
George R.R. Martin - Boxset of all 4 Game of Thrones novels that existed at the time
Alan Moore - Watchmen
Frank Miller - The Dark Knight Returns
Image Comics - The Walking Dead vol. 1
Michael Crichton - Airframe
Michael Crichton - (title unreadable)
Roger Ma - The Zombie Combat Manual
Peter Olafson - Final Fantasy III Players Guide
An Adobe "For Dummies" book
Dead Rising 2 game guide
Far Cry 2 game guide
More game guides


The furries should ask Phil about Redwall.

Dan Brown, game guides, an Adobe book, and a zombie fighting manual!?

 

[Kosher Dill]

I wonder if the zombie manual is where he learned to keep a hatchet by the doorway.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

I wish all my fellow Kiwifroggas a happy Derich Day

 

[BlackDragoons]

My question is when and where did he have the stroke?

I'm honestly wondering.

 

[N0thingICanDo]

Attention guys

It's Derich's birthday today and he tagged 20 porn stars to celebrate

Expect a lot of "HAPPY BIRTHDAY DERICH" during today's stream from chat

 

[Iron Hamster]

My question is when and where did he have the stroke?

I'm honestly wondering.

While the stroke double entendre meme is funny, it's Bells Palsy.

 

[Dona Morte]

My question is when and where did he have the stroke?

I'm honestly wondering.

There is such a thing as mini strokes.
You know when he just freezes and seems to stop?
It's like a miss fire in the brain.

 

[San Dimas High School]

While the stroke double entendre meme is funny, it's Bells Palsy.

Bell's palsy is temporary and he's been like this forever.

 

[Derich 2nd of coomland]

So with all the talk about DSP's lack of any plans for retirement got me thinking (yeah yeah I know we shouldn't try and do that), what if Phil lucks out again and both his parents get hit by a falling satellite during their weekly trip to the mall (as all real mature adult do)?

He could sell the WaKhando and move back to Bridgeport and maybe sit even better that he does now.

Assuming he uses some of the money to pay all his back taxes from what my low tier "research" have dug up he should be able to be way better off.

Spoiler: Wakhando values

Spoiler: CT home, taxes and such

So what it looks like to me is this( but please anybody knowing more about the US taxes and such PLEASE correct any mistakes I made with this theory):

 

[Iron Hamster]

Bell's palsy is temporary and he's been like this forever.

It can last for years. Seen it first hand.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

Attention guys

It's Derich's birthday today and he tagged 20 porn stars to celebrate

Expect a lot of "HAPPY BIRTHDAY DERICH" during today's stream from chat

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@MrBigFatDick hey cool he @'d me

 

[Jaximus]

So since Phil’s health has been a topic of discussion lately and for some reason I decided to check up on Jack Scalfani and I couldn’t help but compare him and Phil. I almost feel Phil looks more unhealthy than Jack, meanwhile Jack is 14 years older and has had 2 strokes.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

I wish all my fellow Kiwifroggas a happy Derich Day

We should've all pitched in for some koolaid and a visit from Officer Sanders.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

This just sounds like they couldn't wait to get him out.

Escorted out of the building after a meeting making him do the walk of shame, not even waiting till end of day to let him go.
Firing on a Friday which is arguably the worst time to fire someone, mainly as a courtesy to the employees picking up the slack and to the ex-employee who now has to wait till monday to start their job search
just sent him random shit, they didn't care enough to find out what was his or not.

The rest of that is unwatchable, so many things that have nothing to do with each other and just back and forth random shit that horribly made up he might as well have sat there and said he was the queen of england. God Phil, how pathetic is your life you have to make up movie like situations for randos on the internet.

We kind of have to read between the lines when we're listening to Phi's stories. Here's what I'm pretty sure happened. That guy who was "promising him the world"? He got Phil promoted. Phil was a basic bitch secretary. The minute he was handed actual responsibility he fell apart. He had five months to get his shit together, probably to be nice to Dave. Phil dropped the ball, was completely incompetent, didn't know what he was doing. Got fired.
Months later Phil sees the guy in a shop while having pizza with his mommy and daddy. He's been chewing his fucking dad's ear off CONSTANTLY about how they did him dirty and he was a great employee. His dad points out this guy in a restaurant. Phil, after weeks of yapping at his dad, plays it down because he's scared of confrontation. His father realizes he should have finished in a napkin.

 

[Iron Hamster]

The best part about Phail's totally real story is how he doesn't hold grudges anymore.

 

[Kosher Dill]

We should've all pitched in for some koolaid and a visit from Officer Sanders.

I can't afford $11.95

 

[King of Hateful Slurs]

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

View attachment 2881309

Poor Derich.

 

[Derich 2nd of coomland]

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