Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[AnOminous]

In the pre-internet past you could kinda sorta justify eating franchise food abroad because you're in an unfamiliar place with an unfamiliar language and you're not sure where to go or what to get.

Yeah but now we're in a global pandemic. People faced with an obvious foreign tourist, from America, who would be a piece of shit at the best of times, and on top of that, the law demands they ask them for proof of vaccination, are just going to be "where's your vaxeem." And then any response other than whipping it out is going to be "get the fuck out."

So this moron literally blew money he needs for legal fees to go to a country where the only fast food establishment willing to serve him is Burger King.

Everywhere else wants them vaxeems.

For me personally, if I had to travel to a country all by myself I would’ve built up a rough itinerary of restaurants and places I wanted to go and even planned out how I would get from A to B. Hit some local cafes that got good reviews and all that.

So basically what you're saying is you're not a complete retard, you'd do what a normal person would do.

It's just embarrassing that this subhuman is somehow thinking that showing himself wearing a Burger King hat is a win of some sort. How? The logic completely escapes me.

Ralph is amazing. An event that would be the most humiliating embarrassment in most people's lives is somehow a win in this pig's life. I'm glad to be human, and not subhuman, like Ralph.

 

[Image Reactions]

Yeah but now we're in a global pandemic. People faced with an obvious foreign tourist, from America, who would be a piece of shit at the best of times, and on top of that, the law demands they ask them for proof of vaccination, are just going to be "where's your vaxeem." And then any response other than whipping it out is going to be "get the fuck out."

So this moron literally blew money he needs for legal fees to go to a country where the only fast food establishment willing to serve him is Burger King.

Everywhere else wants them vaxeems.

And watching NFL on his phone. Hell, he could have spent the money and went to the game.

 

[The Big Dream]

View attachment 2914348
Kind of looks shoop'd.

It just looks that way because he's under half a shadow (probably from the building he's in), and the rest of the city is well-lit. You can see on the right flap of his face how the lighting should look.

Also obligatory lol @ him covering his triple chin cheeseburger in a soy pose. This has reached Leafy levels of self-disgust.

 

[Hüftpriester]

Eating burger king and watching the NFL in a Lisbon hotel at 3am to own the haters, total Ralphamale victory.

 

[Chris Mclean]

What’s even better is Ralph is so obsessed with Andy he has traveled thousand of miles to soak up the culture and ambiance of Andy’s ancestry. He will probably be looking for a hooker that reminds him of Andy tonight.

Seriously, it’s like me saying I hate that fucking Dr. Sanji Gupta on CNN so I’m going to spend a week in Punjab with a bunch of Hindus to show that asshole what I think.

Or his sister but that brown eyed beuaty only has eyes for one man.

Jaaaaaaaaaah

 

[Tommy's Mom]

Eating burger king and watching the NFL in a Lisbon hotel at 3am to own the haters, total Ralphamale victory.
View attachment 2914448

Holy shit. He really is going to just stay in his hotel room the entire trip, eating Burger King and banging 14-year-old hookers. This is too funny.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

Holy shit. He really is going to just stay in his hotel room the entire trip, eating Burger King and banging 14-year-old hookers. This is too funny.

I think you're overestimating him. He's going to sit in his hotel room eating Burger King and fap to imaginary 14-year-old hookers.

I'll give the Gunt credit that he's actually managed to lure in and bang nubile young women over time, but that's a far cry from being able to arrange for such services on short notice in a country where he doesn't speak the language.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

It's just embarrassing that this subhuman is somehow thinking that showing himself wearing a Burger King hat is a win of some sort. How? The logic completely escapes me.

Ralph is amazing. An event that would be the most humiliating embarrassment in most people's lives is somehow a win in this pig's life. I'm glad to be human, and not subhuman, like Ralph.

I mean him going to Portugal as an "own" is also fucking retarded.

"Haha Andy cant afford to go to PT but I can!"

Ralph completely missing the distinction between visiting a country and relocating. I have no doubt that Andy could afford a ticket to PT, hell, anyone in this thread who works a full time job could easily afford a week in PT. MOVING to PT on the other-hand is expensive and time-consuming and Ralph could not afford that kind of expense.

Its ass backwards logic and self-own as there is no way hes having his moneys worth of fun there. If he went in the summer and spent a few weeks planning it would be a pretty nice vacation I think and could come out as a win... even though getting gunt to drop 2k on a vacation on a weeks notice just makes Andy seem like he has crazy power over Ralph.

 

[He Who Points And Laughs]

This is why when foreigners trash America in front of me I just claim to be Canadian because there's no way to defend this as even human behavior. When we send these subhuman apes abroad, we aren't sending our best. Sad. Many such cases.

I used to do the same thing in Tokyo. We had gunjin (gaijjin = foreigner, but gunjin = military people... from beigunjin 'American military person'), and they would occasionally do things like rape a 14 year old Japanese girl. So distancing myself as far as possible from that seemed appropriate,

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

anyone in this thread who works a full time job

shit anyone who works 20 hours a week, fucking NEETs could afford it right now, round trip tickets are dirt cheap, a week in a shitty hotel cheap, and if you eat at fine dining establishments like the gunt for the week ala the world renown portugal's burger king than you could spend a week in Lisbon portugal for less than 1000 total, with extra money for trinkets and ubers. Covid has airfare prices insanely cheap right now because they are all hurting, best time to travel if you don't have a lot of liquid cash

 

[AnOminous]

Ralph completely missing the distinction between visiting a country and relocating. I have no doubt that Andy could afford a ticket to PT, hell, anyone in this thread who works a full time job could easily afford a week in PT. MOVING to PT on the other-hand is expensive and time-consuming and Ralph could not afford that kind of expense.

I could move to Portugal. I'd prefer to move to Belize. I could move to Mexico. I could move to the Czech Republic. I could even move to Serbia. There's a fuckton of places I could move to. Guess where I like? Amurrica!

 

[LemmeSee]

Eating burger king and watching the NFL in a Lisbon hotel at 3am to own the haters, total Ralphamale victory.
View attachment 2914448

To be fair that game was incredible.

 

[Zaryiu2]

$14.95 for Burger King?! I wouldn't brag about that, Andy. Jesus, Canada really is collapsing isn't it? Andy literally just posted the in-store prices. Canada is fucked, and Lord Humungous is laughing his ass off right now.

Maybe he is including gas he used to get it? A whopper combo is 6.49$ Canadian and assuming he is in a province with 10 percent sales taxes (hal provincial and half federal) that is 7.15$ Canadian equal to 5.69 American

 

[PyrrhicRustle]

Ralph is amazing. An event that would be the most humiliating embarrassment in most people's lives is somehow a win in this pig's life. I'm glad to be human, and not subhuman, like Ralph.

I dunno, there's something to be said for the sheer pigheadedness to be able to convince yourself that no matter how badly you've fucked up or how low you've sunk, you are a good person who's come out on top anyway. Ignorance is bliss and all that. Does it really matter how much everyone else views you as scum if at the end of the day you manage to pretend to yourself that you're really better than everyone anyway?

 

[Disheveled Human]

 

[AltisticRight]

This is why when foreigners trash America in front of me I just claim to be Canadian because there's no way to defend this as even human behavior. When we send these subhuman apes abroad, we aren't sending our best. Sad. Many such cases.

Would be great to send obnoxious American and Chinese tourists to some Pacific uninhabited island and firebomb it. Better, send them to West Memphis and firebomb that. Include the covid spergs too. Some of the worst tourists I've encountered were Ameriblacks and Mainlanders. Some escaped zoo ape started to lecture some FOB about systemic racism once after he told her to keep quiet in a quiet train carriage. Just imagine that "this is librralee" slantie kid getting lectured on evil Whitey bad and the slaves after telling a group of feral apes to piss off.

God they are the worst. There was also some international Ameriblack trying to Usain Bolt a closing train door and got Newton's third law to the face, his gay MacBook went flying across the platform.

I got ahold of all of Ralph's vacations photos. I'm actually impressed. He managed to hit every famous landmark in Portgual. Andy Warski: Eternally BTFOed.

Alobaca Monastery
View attachment 2914345

Belem Tower
View attachment 2914350

Bengali Cave
View attachment 2914358

Dom Luis Bridge
View attachment 2914363


Pena Palace
View attachment 2914373

Praco Do Comercio
View attachment 2914377

Quinta Da Regaleira
View attachment 2914385

You missed the ones at "red light districts", KFC and McDonald's.

Seriously, imaging wanting Ralph in a jail cell now.

 

[Retrodogkiller]

Maybe he is including gas he used to get it? A whopper combo is 6.49$ Canadian and assuming he is in a province with 10 percent sales taxes (hal provincial and half federal) that is 7.15$ Canadian equal to 5.69 American

Andy's a lazy fuck and probably had it delivered through door dash or Uber eats which would account for the higher cost. Still cheaper then Ralph's 600$ Portugal Whopper.

 

[Disheveled Human]

Someone should write this story into Bill Burr he might read it on his podcast and call Ralph a giant retard. It's stories like these that he tends to read although he may not believe it because its so absurd.

 

[AnOminous]

Imagine how much this fat pig paid to eat a Big Whopper that he could have eaten within walking distance, but he literally paid to eat in Lisbon.

LMAO LMAO LMAO.

 

[Zaryiu2]

Andy's a lazy fuck and probably had it delivered through door dash or Uber eats which would account for the higher cost. Still cheaper then Ralph's 600$ Portugal Whopper.

Yeah but I assume he is in Ontario so I can see that potentially increasing prices (Ontario is pretty crazy)