Trashfire Ethan Ralph vs. Mister Metokur & Gator - It's finally happening

[UCantCCPMe]

This makes me wonder if a thinner Ralphamale could use all that excessive gunt skin like a X-men mutant power. Theoretically if swung with enough force he could slap criminals with the hairy gunt flesh to incapacitate them. All he would need is a name. The Guntless sounds intimidating but is too obvious idk

Solomon Gunty
Drunk on a Monday
Weed on Tuesday
Sneed on Wednesday
Coke on Thursday
Cope on Friday
Spends the weekend getting wrecked on the highway
This is the story of Solomon Gunty

 

[Sneeds_Sniggerly]

Solomon Gunty
Drunk on a Monday
Weed on Tuesday
Sneed on Wednesday
Coke on Thursday
Cope on Friday
Spends the weekend getting wrecked on the highway
This is the story of Solomon Gunty

Is Batman able to overcome the MASS of THE GUNT?! Find out next time! Same Gunt-Time, same Gunt-Channel!

 

[ButterNugget]

This makes me wonder if a thinner Ralphamale could use all that excessive gunt skin like a X-men mutant power. Theoretically if swung with enough force he could slap criminals with the hairy gunt flesh to incapacitate them. All he would need is a name. The Guntless sounds intimidating but is too obvious idk

The Gunt Knight

 

[Cad an Hell]

He did make a promise that if he did bring it up as a topic on The Official Podcast, he would say, near the end of the segment no less, Adriane Blaire won.
Timestamp 1:16:25 :

https://youtu.be/wNHX0kZr0_c?t=4585

View attachment 2973492

Just to add..

Kaya is a fairly regular guest host on Who Are These Podcasts (WATP) - a podcast that essentially reviews other podcasts ( they typically pick bad ones and shit on them). I'm pretty sure he's also been on The Dick Show. Dick is a fan of WATP and they do crossover episodes.

I wonder if this little glimpse of the Killstream will inspire Kaya to recommend the Killstream as the subject of a WATP episode.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Ralph quitting on Jarbo seems to hint that Ralph will not do a stream in which he isn't in charge, and the moderators aren't neutral or on his side. I suspect he went with Jarbo because he felt he was gonna have an easy time dunking on him with Jim, and even tried to pull Jarbo into the conversation. But he couldn't handle his shit being thrown back at him. We may not actually see him do a stream like that again.

This. Ralph is such a pussy that he’ll only do streams where he can mute people and control everything. Hilarious for someone who tries to flex as such a gangster that he can’t even take part in a conversation unless he can mute and holler over everyone. He’s such a fat crybaby. Instead of a pacifier, he sucks on a cigar that looks like a BBC.

 

[Talakai]

Just to add..

Kaya is a fairly regular guest host on Who Are These Podcasts (WATP) - a podcast that essentially reviews other podcasts ( they typically pick bad ones and shit on them). I'm pretty sure he's also been on The Dick Show. Dick is a fan of WATP and they do crossover episodes.

I wonder if this little glimpse of the Killstream will inspire Kaya to recommend the Killstream as the subject of a WATP episode.

I believe Karl are Ralph are friendly, at least enough so that Karl wouldn't feature the KS on WATP. I would love to be proven wrong, though.

 

[Turtle Who Snapped]

It's an interesting thought experience. Ideally, Ralph would leave the internet, focus on sobriety, get his first ever job in real life, focus on his family, and actually deal with the shit he has been ignoring with drugs and alcohol..

Ralph's biggest problem is he can't afford to stop streaming and his brand is toxic as fuck. That said, he could probably get some relatively small YouTube health guru, a YouTube financial specialist, and a YouTube therapist to basically do a series of streams detailing how fucked up his life is and trying to turn it around.

Who wouldn't want to watch a stream as someone goes through Ralph's finances with him. And then some muscle head making Ralph miserable with a diet and exercise. Shit like that. Everyone loves a redemption arc.

I bet it would last 10 minutes before he quit.

I think ten minutes is very generous. Ralph, regardless of how long he's been an addict, is at that shitty point in the cycle where he knows he's an addict, he 100% KNOWS he's fucking up. But he cannot quit and cannot back down. Because he's trying to convince everyone (himself included) that he's fine, and he's the exception to the rule that being a degenerate junkie will ruin and inevitably end your life. If he backs down from a fight he started while drink or high, it puts a dent in that denial. If he admits he's been wrong while intoxicated, it puts a dent in that shell of denial. He's not gonna back down. He's not gonna stop derailing his life and livelihood. Because then he has to take a hard look at the damage his addiction is doing to him, and he's nowhere near done being a pill-popping alcoholic. He's enjoying being high too much, and I guarantee he can't even conceive of a life where he never feels drunk or stoned again.
Source; my own absolutely degenerate past.
Btw; recovery is possible for most.. just not usually those with no will power (like Ralph) or those who are so thin skinned they can't possibly find even a moment of humility (also Ralph).

 

[Sektor 37]

He called it that before though and even then the kill stream? It's like some gi Joe coldsteel oc name. If I asked you to make a fake alt right stream you'd pick Ralph's stolen skull logo and a dumb goofy name like the kill stream, why not just the die stream while we're at it and one of the catchphrases is just saying die when Matt reveals flag history

Maybe you weren't in the target market, but it was still an excellent name for the product itself.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

As someone who has family who are alcoholics the most likely course for Ralph going "cold turkey" is it last for maybe a day or two before he starts getting stressed or wants to reward himself for doing so well and drinks and instead of it just being a glass its an entire bottle.
Going cold turkey doesn't work unless you have someone whos willing to stand up and take the booze away and stop you from buying more.
I Also think this is the calm before the storm as bigger channels are probably editing together something if they want to truly capture the beauty that was the livestream. My money is that we will get a documentary vid from some youtuber

The issue for Ralph is probably multifaceted.

First, it's potentially the case that his alcohol problem is so bad he needs to go cold turkey. It may not be possible for him to moderate his drinking, and that returning to alcohol will always result in a binge. Which makes the issue more difficult, moderating alcohol can be easier because you are not depriving yourself of what you want - just taking control of how it effects your life. If he is to be totally abstinent Ralph will need to accept a life without alcohol, and that means to coming to terms with how he will live without drinking ever again. It's a daunting task, and the sort of thing Ralph has shown time and again he is incapable of achieving.

Second, Ralph probably drinks due to whatever mental health issues he has. He seems to have some serious trauma regarding his dad, his past relationships and where he is in life. He lacks the degree of insight to deal with these problems, he instead just numbs them with booze. Without dealing with these problems in a healthy way - which will require the kind of inward inflection Ralph refuses to do - they will continue to haunt him until he puts more booze down his gullet (or if he goes cold turkey as he alleges he did for 120 days... He'll just smoke weed).

Given the fact that it took a week long feltening of epic proportions for Ralph to even consider how his behaviour has brought on these consequences, the chances of him achieving the above are basically nil. Dudes fucked.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

Consuming the quantities Ralph does then going cold turkey is just asking to die you never detox like that even under medical supervision it is dangerous. Basically they have to give you ethanol so you don’t crash from withdrawals.

 

[Tobias]

Basically they have to give you ethanol so you don’t crash from withdrawals.

A cruel irony that he must inject the corn directly into his veins in order to get the help he needs.

 

[oramge cat]

It's an interesting thought experience. Ideally, Ralph would leave the internet, focus on sobriety, get his first ever job in real life, focus on his family, and actually deal with the shit he has been ignoring with drugs and alcohol..

Ralph's biggest problem is he can't afford to stop streaming and his brand is toxic as fuck. That said, he could probably get some relatively small YouTube health guru, a YouTube financial specialist, and a YouTube therapist to basically do a series of streams detailing how fucked up his life is and trying to turn it around.

Who wouldn't want to watch a stream as someone goes through Ralph's finances with him. And then some muscle head making Ralph miserable with a diet and exercise. Shit like that. Everyone loves a redemption arc.

I bet it would last 10 minutes before he quit.

Something about this post kinda hit me. He's never worked an actual job and has absolutely no useful skills. He's not even good with computers AFAIK and even if he was I doubt he could leverage his particular streaming career to get some sort of tech job. I almost, almost felt sorry for him for a second and then I remembered that it's Ethan Ralph and empathy is for humans, not fupas that somehow gained sentience.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

A cruel irony that he must inject the corn directly into his veins in order to get the help he needs.

The corn must flow…

 

[northstar747]

Something about this post kinda hit me. He's never worked an actual job and has absolutely no useful skills. He's not even good with computers AFAIK and even if he was I doubt he could leverage his particular streaming career to get some sort of tech job. I almost, almost felt sorry for him for a second and then I remembered that it's Ethan Ralph and empathy is for humans, not fupas that somehow gained sentience.

Weird because it sounds just like Richard "lowtax" kyanka.

both had nothing but time, and peole around them who could teach them the basics of what their "empire" was buildt on but hey why bother. Also richard ate a bullet.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Something about this post kinda hit me. He's never worked an actual job and has absolutely no useful skills. He's not even good with computers AFAIK and even if he was I doubt he could leverage his particular streaming career to get some sort of tech job. I almost, almost felt sorry for him for a second and then I remembered that it's Ethan Ralph and empathy is for humans, not fupas that somehow gained sentience.

It’s a sad state of affairs that he can even make a somewhat living off of streaming himself watching YouTube and mumbling insignificant comments. The fact that there are even 200 people in the world retarded enough to think he’s cool and entertaining is concerning.

 

[NPC304348]

the thought of skinny ralph with a gigantic gunt skin pancake hanging off of his abdomen made me spit out my coffee in disgust

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

It’s a sad state of affairs that he can even make a somewhat living off of streaming himself watching YouTube and mumbling insignificant comments. The fact that there are even 200 people in the world retarded enough to think he’s cool and entertaining is concerning.

This is the most amazing part to me. There have been radio shows or podcasts where I hate the host or think their opinions are garbage but I can still understand why ppl listen or how it’s entertaining. Not so with Ralph.

Ralph is like the dumb fat guy at who sits at the end stool in a dive bar in front of the TV, mumbling or yelling at it while getting wasted. You can at least ignore him most of the time in a bar, but to tune in to a stream for that shit?

Weird because it sounds just like Richard "lowtax" kyanka.

both had nothing but time, and peole around them who could teach them the basics of what their "empire" was buildt on but hey why bother. Also richard ate a bullet.

Ironically Lowtax had way more money than Ralph could even dream of, owned homes, actually got married twice (not just fathered bastards), and at one point had some real skills.

Basically what I’m saying is Ralph is the retarded, poor, white trash version of Lowtax.

 

[Post Reply]

the thought of skinny ralph with a gigantic gunt skin pancake hanging off of his abdomen made me spit out my coffee in disgust

Think of it like a built-in flesh apron.

 

[Franz Joseph]

You guys see that Ramzpaul is going to bat for Ralph? I don't understand why he's deciding to hitch his wagons to this white trash dumpster fire. He's gonna learn real quick that nothing good comes from associating with the gunt.

 

[GuitarRevi]

He is
Dun dun dun

The Flap!

Spoiler: WTF

Found his side kick, Princess Six Flaps