Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

Maybe this is just the Super Bowl hangover still talking, but sometimes I wonder if Rob’s gentle skewering of Jack is a normal form of interaction for boomers, and I’m just too socially maladjusted to recognize it as anything but trolling.

 

[desudesu]

Apparently from what I know, Rob and his entire family are avid motorcycle enthusiasts - from wife to the kids.

It will be even be double the shade thrown if Rob went and meet Jack on his motorcycle (it is near impossible to ride a motorcycle with one working arm). As a rider myself, Rob gets additional cool dad points.

On an unrelated note, it appears as though Garrett has a new lady in his life. Immensely more attractive than his last imo.
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Man, I wonder what happened. Did Garrett's previous girl got super turned off/disillusioned upon meeting the Scalfani clan in Vegas, or knowing how she'll be cast into the spotlight being part of the Scalfani Cinematic Universe?

Knowing the fat man's bias towards Dad Bod Qali, he probably would've went, "At least Qali stayed loyal to his relationship like his dedication to God" or some shit along those lines.

 

[Aaway]

i'm surprised fatty didn't nuke this post off the FB group

there's also this but he wouldn't understand the reference

 

[the khat quaffer]

Apparently from what I know, Rob and his entire family are avid motorcycle enthusiasts - from wife to the kids.

It will be even be double the shade thrown if Rob went and meet Jack on his motorcycle (it is near impossible to ride a motorcycle with one working arm). As a rider myself, Rob gets additional cool dad points.

Maybe if Jack is nice, Rob will let him ride with him in one of those little side cars. God help him if he let Jack ride with him in the bitch seat...the vibration, and all. Permanent soy face the whole time

 

[FatJacksFatAssTongue]

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Thanks Rob!

Getting a rare glimpse of Fatso out and about in his natural habitat was the highlight for me. I was taken aback at how quickly he seemed to be scooting along there; seemed like he was doing his best impression of the 100 yard dash.

Imagine being the crew here with this idiot lumbering straight toward you trying to introduce a couple of strangers. Plus you just know everyone talked behind his back about how he was too much of a jewbag to contribute anything at all when the (very) charitable owner/“friend” passed a couple years back.

 

[desudesu]

Fatty strokeposting again.

I'm guessing he's talking about how people are being cookie cutter versions of each other. Bitch, you literally surround yourself in an echo chamber and repeat the same opinions as your murderchurch buddies.

ETA: What in the sweet fuck is "keto chicken nuggets". He's probably going to coat chicken pieces with grated cheese and fry it. Calling it.

@rubytintedchix 's PCTLM 'Pink Chicken Nuggets' is actually materialising as a Scalfani culinary creation.

 

[Pig Cups]

Maybe if Jack is nice, Rob will let him ride with him in one of those little side cars. God help him if he let Jack ride with him in the bitch seat...the vibration, and all. Permanent soy face the whole time

I gave you a horrifying rating because I was reminded of that episode of Curb where the vibrations of Larry’s broken passenger seat have a pleasurable effect.

“Permanent soy face the whole time,” as Jack’s newfound erogenous zone gets stimulated while he holds on to Rob’s waist. You see, fat is death to a dick, and it’s highly possible that Jack’s doesn’t work anymore. Then again, he did surprise us by showing that he somehow still drives…

 

[ten dollars off]

On the note about Rob using Jack's sauce, I was wondering: what's the shelf life on those sauces? I think we can assume he never sold through his initial inventory, so the sauces he has should be from when the line was launched. How long do you think he will try to keep selling his rancid backstock?

 

[GentlemanFaggot]

On the note about Rob using Jack's sauce, I was wondering: what's the shelf life on those sauces? I think we can assume he never sold through his initial inventory, so the sauces he has should be from when the line was launched. How long do you think he will try to keep selling his rancid backstock?

If they're sealed properly they should be disgusting but probably not going to poison you. That being said, Best Before dates are there for liability, do not attempt unless you have MRESteve's stomach.

A few people bought them and reported the ingredients were separating and in general was nasty.

EDIT: Also it's not made clear if Jack bottled them or hired a company to do it. If Jack bottled them, you couldn't pay me to try it. One of Jack's more forgotten incidents was when he did a canning/jarring episode and contaminated the jar/can by touching the contents before sealing. This one was such a health and safety issue that even Jack took it down, because while Jack eating raw chicken is obviously a health risk that anyone with a working brain can figure out, sealing a can with a breeding culture of botulism is more deadly and not a widely known risk to a layman since the danger is not visible to our eyes.

 

[Kosher Salt]

Fatty strokeposting again.

I'm guessing he's talking about how people are being cookie cutter versions of each other. Bitch, you literally surround yourself in an echo chamber and repeat the same opinions as your murderchurch buddies.

View attachment 2990738

Reverse your reading of that. It says you should hang out with people you want to be like.

He's kind of got a point, I can't imagine why someone would want to hang out with a twice stroked out fat diabetic retard like Jack. Unless they're low-key mocking him, of course.

 

[desudesu]

Reverse your reading of that. It says you should hang out with people you want to be like.

He's kind of got a point, I can't imagine why someone would want to hang out with a twice stroked out fat diabetic retard like Jack. Unless they're low-key mocking him, of course.

I see it now. To be honest, Fatty's narc behaviour and constant desire to be UNIQUE in his opinions had led me to misinterpret the post. Or did I? You never know with Mushbrain, really.

 

[Gentlebastard]

On the note about Rob using Jack's sauce, I was wondering: what's the shelf life on those sauces? I think we can assume he never sold through his initial inventory, so the sauces he has should be from when the line was launched. How long do you think he will try to keep selling his rancid backstock?

Considering the sheer amount of salt and sugar required to penetrate Jack's withered tastebuds, and that the sauces were made according to Mushbrain's tastes, my guess is sometime between affordable personal jetpacks and the heat death of the universe.

The pharaoh's tombs were sealed with jars of honey inside, which are still edible to this day. Fatty-Fatty Ham-Ham's legacy will be a long-dead YouTube channel, the mockery from this thread, his kids, and whatever sauces manage to escape the closest landfill.

 

[GentlemanFaggot]

Reverse your reading of that. It says you should hang out with people you want to be like.

He's kind of got a point, I can't imagine why someone would want to hang out with a twice stroked out fat diabetic retard like Jack. Unless they're low-key mocking him, of course.

If they're so repugnant that they can't hang out with anyone else, I guess.

See: /Paul/

 

[DuckSucker]

ETA: What in the sweet fuck is "keto chicken nuggets". He's probably going to coat chicken pieces with grated cheese and fry it. Calling it.
View attachment 2991217

Nah dude hes the type of motherfucker to bread chicken strips in crunched up chicharonnes and deep fry it. Its all fat no carbs so its healthy. Grating cheese would be too much effort for the lazy man.

 

[Aaway]

On the note about Rob using Jack's sauce, I was wondering: what's the shelf life on those sauces? I think we can assume he never sold through his initial inventory, so the sauces he has should be from when the line was launched. How long do you think he will try to keep selling his rancid backstock?

the jar that should i series reviewed on YT a couple years ago had clearly been sitting on the shelf for years because it had nearly turned solid. the jar that rob reviewed a while back, on the other hand, wasn't nearly as thick (although it was still far thicker than any bbq sauce i've ever seen)

jack was probably sitting on a bunch of supply from years back before he linked up with do it best and had new batches made. so anyone who ordered the sauce prior to jack's deal with do it best was most likely getting sauce that was expired

 

[AnOminous]

Are there any jack on the go doing Chinese restaurants and going for the orange chicken like he said he does? That must be so aggravating for waiting staff.

Jack must be annoying but what would specifically be annoying about someone ordering one of the most common dishes on the menu?

 

[RL Steinbeck]

I gave you a horrifying rating because I was reminded of that episode of Curb where the vibrations of Larry’s broken passenger seat have a pleasurable effect.

“Permanent soy face the whole time,” as Jack’s newfound erogenous zone gets stimulated while he holds on to Rob’s waist. You see, fat is death to a dick, and it’s highly possible that Jack’s doesn’t work anymore. Then again, he did surprise us by showing that he somehow still drives…

“This CAR… is a FUCK machine!”

Now that im thinking about it, Jack would make an amazing foil to Larry over the course of a season. Imagine Larry dressing down Jack while he’s recording a loud restaurant review at an adjacent table. I want to write a spec script now lol

 

[Helvítis Túristi]

Jack must be annoying but what would specifically be annoying about someone ordering one of the most common dishes on the menu?

It would be the context of Jack's autistic sign if a restaurant is good or not. I have never seen a jack on the go for a Chinese restaurant. So I don't know if he asks for orange chicken sauce, a small sample of it, or actually orders and pays for it. I will have to look for them and see how he behaves towards them.

Edit: Found one where the staff instantly hate him along with him missing the middle eastern food in California. No orange chicken though.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Fatty strokeposting again.

I'm guessing he's talking about how people are being cookie cutter versions of each other. Bitch, you literally surround yourself in an echo chamber and repeat the same opinions as your murderchurch buddies.

View attachment 2990738

ETA: What in the sweet fuck is "keto chicken nuggets". He's probably going to coat chicken pieces with grated cheese and fry it. Calling it.

@rubytintedchix 's PCTLM 'Pink Chicken Nuggets' is actually materialising as a Scalfani culinary creation.

View attachment 2991217

It's probably using crushed up pork rinds or something because you know that's not vile.

Nah dude hes the type of motherfucker to bread chicken strips in crunched up chicharonnes and deep fry it. Its all fat no carbs so its healthy. Grating cheese would be too much effort for the lazy man.

Same thing as pork rinds but then he's done stuff like that before.

And of course he wouldn't grate the cheese himself. He buys the big 5lb bags of the pre-grated stuff at a huge markup and they're loaded with wood pulp or "cellulose" to keep it from clumping.

 

[AnOminous]

And of course he wouldn't grate the cheese himself. He buys the big 5lb bags of the pre-grated stuff at a huge markup and they're loaded with wood pulp or "cellulose" to keep it from clumping.

Which also keeps it from melting. Or tasting good. That shit is garbage.