Any advice for surviving NYC subways?

[Corndog]

I normally treat my mask with scented oil to fight the stench but it doesn't protect me from the violence. Things are getting bad, worse than I have ever seen. 6 unrelated stabbings/slashing this past weekend and today someone was attacked with a hatchet. My coworkers and I, each who ride different routes to work, trade stories of insanity including but not limited to pissing, shitting, shouting and threats of violence. When the weather gets better I am bicycling but have a few weeks left before that is feasible. How do I make sure I live that long? Anyone have any advice other than (arguably the best advice) get the fuck out of the city?

 

[Jimmy Pop]

Be crazier than the crazies, stock up on your own shit and piss and throw it at people who bother you, I promise nobody will want to be around you then

 

[DumbDude42]

start carrying
better to be the next bernhard goetz than to be the next stabbing victim that bleeds out on the piss stained floor

 

[NigKid]

nothing beats carrying your backpack on your erect penis, never been bothered once

 

[Robert w'E'd Leef]

Don't make eye contact with niggers or Puerto Ricans

 

[snailslime]

smell good

 

[Papa Adolfo's Take'n'Bake]

Stab yourself before they stab you.

 

[Santa Fe Swag]

Don't sit in the seats, there might be shit in the seats.

 

[NerdShamer]

Get an stun gun or baseball bat.

 

[Corndog]

Get an stun gun or baseball bat.

I can't stop thinking of ways to use a polymerization card here. How awesome would an electric stun baseball bat be?!

 

[SandyCat]

Get a concealed carry permit. No more worrying about the nigs trying to culturally enrich your life with stabbings

 

[seri0us]

Get a gun. Oh, wait.

 

[NigKid]

I can't stop thinking of ways to use a polymerization card here. How awesome would an electric stun baseball bat be?!

theyre called stun batons

play baseball with your kid in the park, play "baseball" with your dealer in the dark

 

[FarCentrist]

Hide behind an elderly Asian woman.

 

[nichtmeinName]

How about dont live in NYC

 

[Bonesjones]

Did you try watching the documentary series called Death wish?

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Don't go to NYC subways?

Maybe not even go to NYC in the first place?

 

[MarkofdaBOOG]

leave NYC

 

[I Love Beef]

Zip up your bags to one side. Keep your wallet in the front of your pocket, and keep some money on the outside to not flash your cash. Know what neighborhoods you're going through. Because elbow room is lacking, do not take it personally if someone nudges you or bumps into you.

Rule of thumb, unless they are that desperate or stupid, anyone knows Rykers is not fun. Rykers makes other jails look like a day in the pokey on The Andy Griffiths Show. Anyone would be wise to not be a fucking asshole. NYPD will sometimes go undercover to catch perps.

Have a fun time.

 

[Jewthulhu]

Get a concealed carry permit. No more worrying about the nigs trying to culturally enrich your life with stabbings

That would have been my suggestion but are you allowed to do that in Jew York City?