Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

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How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Boy, ol' Bobby sure was right about the new Batman movie. It's a total failure that has caused great embarrassment for Warner Brothers and will take them forever to recover fr-

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:story::story::story::story::story::story::story::story::story::story:

Yet another win for Bobstradamus. Get fucked you low-rent Cobblepot.
 
Bob talks about how rare it is to see period products in movies. You know why? Because bodily functions are generally gross.
Yes but a counterpoint: when have you ever seen a fingernail clipper in movies? And fingernail clippings aren't even that gross. I think people just consider personal hygiene to be a private matter, thus unsuited for drama. Menstruation became dramatic because feminists, drama whores, make it so.
 
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Yes but a counterpoint: when have you ever seen a fingernail clipper in movies? And fingernail clippings aren't even that gross. I think people just consider personal hygiene to be a private matter, thus unsuited for drama. Menstruation became dramatic because feminists, drama whores, make it so.
Pretty much that, not to mention that the whole period thing in fiction was always treated a a important milestone for a character, when a girl becomes a woman and etc, and so it is usually brought up as a metaphor like the panda thing in turning red, or stuff like this:

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It is a more poignant way to show how menstruation changes and affects girls rather than just showing them dealing with pads, which is just a personal and rather mundane item.

Not to mention, that was the joke used in the Turning Red movie. When the main character starts to freak out by turning into a giant Red Panda and tries to hide from her parents, the mother jumps to the conclusion that her daughter got her first period and rushes to bring her pads and a bunch of other items for her to deal with the mentruation, when the Mother herself came from a family where women turn into giant beasts at a certain age, so you know, conflicting the extraordinay of the magical panda with the ordinary of a girl having her period...

It was a throw away joke, why Robert got so hung up on showing a period produc ooohhhhh....
 
I made it through about 50 seconds (which is 45 seconds longer than I can usually stand his voice) to be astonished hearing him apparently mocking the idea of judging a film based on external politics and culture rather than its own merits ... as if he doesn't do this every waking hour with every labored breath.
I only made it to 34 seconds. He's just so insufferable. Also his voice goes in and out of a Boston accent, it's very weird.
 
Yes but a counterpoint: when have you ever seen a fingernail clipper in movies? And fingernail clippings aren't even that gross. I think people just consider personal hygiene to be a private matter, thus unsuited for drama. Menstruation became dramatic because feminists, drama whores, make it so.
These two posts actually reminded me of King of the Hill. King of the Hill had an episode where their neighbor Connie had her first period while see was staying with the Hills and in an unrelated episode Hank once was clipping his toe nails in bed. Mind you he had a magazine to catch the nails because he's not a savage.


And you know why King of the Hill had content like that? Because it was a show primarily targeted teens and grown ups. Whereas Pixar films have been traditionally made in mind that kids in single digits are watching it.

I dunno I still haven't seen Turning Red and I can't imagine I ever will unless I have a daughter in the future. It's not a big deal to me that Pixar made a movie about the experience of growing up from a female perspective. But I don't think it deserves praise for breaking some new ground because well really I was a kid who watched King of the Hill nearly daily growing up.

Anyway I know this is old news for this thread but I learned about Moviebob telling Dogfucker YourMovieSucks that he should say in his reviews whether he finished the film.
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I'm in awe that after all these years I found Bob to be a voice of reason for once. Maybe he should only talk about things he knows about but then again he wouldn't be a lolcow then.
 
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(Here are some of Chris and Sarah's wedding photos. Here is a video where you can see Bobby's smooth disco moves)

Fast forward to 2022...
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Obviously "FionaGotIT" is another of those things.
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:feels:😢

Good call, scariest thing I've seen in a while. Only downside is that horror relies on mystery and imagination to enhance the experience, and I didn't even start the video playing and I already knew what it sounded like. Not as scary when you can guess the creature's attributes.
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oh good lord, this is all as autistic as I imagined it would be.
(and coming from a literal autist, that's fucking saying something)

OF COURSE they met at Blockbuster. Of course.

Curious though, I wonder what caused them to break up/take a 4 year break? Hell, what got them back together? The realization that nobody else on the fucking planet is autistic enough to deal with either one of them?
 
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Yes but a counterpoint: when have you ever seen a fingernail clipper in movies? And fingernail clippings aren't even that gross. I think people just consider personal hygiene to be a private matter, thus unsuited for drama. Menstruation became dramatic because feminists, drama whores, make it so.
I've seen clippers in anime: In the fourth arc of Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, the main villain trims his fingernails as a means of divination and keeps the trimmings all in labeled jars. He also bites them in times of stress, to the point his fingers bleed.

"Buff Tater Tot"

Can either Chipman brothers think beyond their ample stomachs?
 
I've seen clippers in anime: In the fourth arc of Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, the main villain trims his fingernails as a means of divination and keeps the trimmings all in labeled jars. He also bites them in times of stress, to the point his fingers bleed.


"Buff Tater Tot"

Can either Chipman brothers think beyond their ample stomachs?
I think it's probably the autistic exceptional daughter that named it. In which case, apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

(also WHAT THE FUCK WAS HE THINKING, GETTING A HAMSTER FOR AN EXCEPTIONAL CHILD OF SEVEN AND A LITERAL TODDLER, both of whom are CHRONICALLY UNDERSUPERVISED while Chippa and Sarah drink and podcast about it? Poor thing probably got stressed to death)
 
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Gay shit. Bobby thinks the Conservative Right are would worship Stalin should they become disillusioned about God.
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Because conservatives makes the staunchest defenders of gay rights, once you convince them God doesn't exist.

I don't know who they are but this pair of gays seem to have elicited a bit of leftist tears:
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A boy who doesn't learn his lesson -- that his incessant cries of genocide will soon lose its meaning -- should be thrown to the wolves.

Bobby apparently thinks if you lose an opportunity to improve your life, you immediately pops out of existence. I bet this is something his Angels taught him.
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Get your bingo card out.
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This bit is apparently also about the gaying of leftist politics. I can't make sense of it, and I'm not sure reading the whole thread helps.
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Some employees are being fired for not recognizing transwomen are women. No big deal. There is no such thing as Cancel Culture.
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And being fired from your job is exactly like a woman wincing at your attempt at your pick-up line:
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Glenn Greenwald doesn't understand The American Military is Global Order, Good Global Order. And when Emma tells you that the two dong-waving men are her moms, you listen or risk being vaporized by drones.
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Contrary to what Greenwald speculates, The Federalist thinks the Dems will be able to keep the public knowing the truth concerning Hunter Biden's laptop (article). Bobby consigns it to the "non-issue" bin which of course also hosts Hillary Rodham's e-mails.
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You see, the problem with Bobby isn't that he doesn't stick to the movies; rather, it is that he can't even tell where movies end and real life begins.

Ted Cruz refuses to greet the President of United Earth.
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Rando comments on Bobby's quote tweets.
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Bobby thinks he looks like Haz.
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I agree. If you want to be a bum like Bobby, don't marry.


Bobby analyses how the Chinese market will affect the Great Queering of Disney
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Turning Red cringe.
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People refuse to recognize that bean-mouth monstrosity as a Red Panda. Bobby grabs the opportunity to sperg:
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Peter Parker:
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Toxic game studios are all alike:
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Luke on the fuckedupness of J. K. Rowling and Orson Scott Card:
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Bojack Horseman:
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Sperging with Matt Wilkins:
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The Catholic app Hallow makes bizarre Youtube vids, staring someone who looks like Sander Bloshinsky as Jesus.
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And she seems way beyond your league / colleague.
 
Gay shit. Bobby thinks the Conservative Right are would worship Stalin should they become disillusioned about God.
View attachment 3089127
Because conservatives makes the staunchest defenders of gay rights, once you convince them God doesn't exist.
Bob thinks revisionism about Stalin, which has been happening for 70+ years, comes from "Social Conservatives" not the left? Sometimes I worry about this boy.

Ted Cruz refuses to greet the President of United Earth.
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I don't understand this at all. Bob hates Ted Cruz, why would he want him "back to work" rather than shitposting about Star Trek? Or does he just think elected officials should not be allowed to have any down time ever?

The one response brings up an old thing too, though I'm still not sure what Ted Cruz was supposed to do about a winter storm in Texas. He's just a Senator, not a god.

Lastly, how is Bob "too busy" for anything? How is he "too busy" to spend a minute to see what this is about while referring to what it's about? What exactly does he do other than post on Twitter and make garbage for YouTube nobody wants?
 
Casting Stacey Abrams, an election truther, as President in Star Trek is just going to encourage the next January 6th terrorist attack.

Also, National Review has no "The" in the name. I'm pretty sure they've had pieces about Star Trek in the past too. People argue about the politics of Star Trek all the time. Bob is such a weirdo, he's ostensibly a film critic yet he talks about politics constantly but here he's complaining that the "Politics Nerds" are talking about Star Trek.
 
Gay shit. Bobby thinks the Conservative Right are would worship Stalin should they become disillusioned about God.
View attachment 3089127
Because conservatives makes the staunchest defenders of gay rights, once you convince them God doesn't exist.

I don't know who they are but this pair of gays seem to have elicited a bit of leftist tears:
View attachment 3089243

View attachment 3089128
A boy who doesn't learn his lesson -- that his incessant cries of genocide will soon lose its meaning -- should be thrown to the wolves.

Bobby apparently thinks if you lose an opportunity to improve your life, you immediately pops out of existence. I bet this is something his Angels taught him.
View attachment 3089268

Get your bingo card out.
View attachment 3089269

This bit is apparently also about the gaying of leftist politics. I can't make sense of it, and I'm not sure reading the whole thread helps.
View attachment 3089323


Some employees are being fired for not recognizing transwomen are women. No big deal. There is no such thing as Cancel Culture.
View attachment 3089121

And being fired from your job is exactly like a woman wincing at your attempt at your pick-up line:
View attachment 3089229

Glenn Greenwald doesn't understand The American Military is Global Order, Good Global Order. And when Emma tells you that the two dong-waving men are her moms, you listen or risk being vaporized by drones.
View attachment 3089141

Contrary to what Greenwald speculates, The Federalist thinks the Dems will be able to keep the public knowing the truth concerning Hunter Biden's laptop (article). Bobby consigns it to the "non-issue" bin which of course also hosts Hillary Rodham's e-mails.
View attachment 3089199
You see, the problem with Bobby isn't that he doesn't stick to the movies; rather, it is that he can't even tell where movies end and real life begins.

Ted Cruz refuses to greet the President of United Earth.
View attachment 3089205


Rando comments on Bobby's quote tweets.
View attachment 3089315

Bobby thinks he looks like Haz.
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View attachment 3089217
I agree. If you want to be a bum like Bobby, don't marry.


Bobby analyses how the Chinese market will affect the Great Queering of Disney
View attachment 3089302

Turning Red cringe.
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People refuse to recognize that bean-mouth monstrosity as a Red Panda. Bobby grabs the opportunity to sperg:
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Peter Parker:
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Toxic game studios are all alike:
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Luke on the fuckedupness of J. K. Rowling and Orson Scott Card:
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Bojack Horseman:
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Sperging with Matt Wilkins:
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The Catholic app Hallow makes bizarre Youtube vids, staring someone who looks like Sander Bloshinsky as Jesus.
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And she seems way beyond your league / colleague.
Just to reiterate, this is what Bob honestly actually thinks believes:
- Conservatives/Republicans/The Stupids/Believers ™️ (but bobby repeats himself) are just itching to minecraft all the darkies, troons, gheys, and speds, and if you're not worried about who's in political power CONSTANTLY (and trying to keep The Stupids - who are also conveniently 'right wing' - from gaining political headway because Muh Holy Soopeeryah Fyootchah is at risk of never coming to pass) they will kill you and everyone you hold dear. Bob is worried to the point of existential dread, because he thinks the existences of anyone he loves who is imperfect in the eyes of the Diet Nazis (or full-on Nazis), such as his troon cousin, sped niece, brother Chippa's gay friend/groomsman, former lesbun "girlfriend" to whom he played Beard, and friends Acquaintances of Color will be immediately snuffed out by the Second Coming of Drumpf before he can do anything. Only by tweeting madly into the aether can CassandraBob prevent these horrific predictions from coming to pass (which explains why Bob said he was perfectly OK with blatant electoral fraud, as long as those from the Right Side of History "rigged" themselves in to win).

Black Female Captain already happened, Bobby's Fan, in fucking 1988. Tryla Scott Captain of the USS Renegade, in the Star Trek TNG episode "Conspiracy". Made captain faster than anyone else, too! Not to mention Geordie LaForge's mother, Silva LaForge, who was captain of the USS Hera in the TNG episode "Interface". NOBODY CARED. (and as far as I can tell nobody got big mad about it, either.) Just as nobody cares that Stacey Abrams got to cosplay as President of Earth, lol. IDGAF about STD, why would I care about some has-been/never-was politician being given a guest spot?

Also, the other side of that STUPID "dark joke" is, Canada's military. As in, we barely fucking have one. Aging equipment, such as CF-18s and WW II era "military-style weapons". And also the health care, which isn't as great as Bob or the person he's replying to imagines it to be.
 
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Because conservatives makes the staunchest defenders of gay rights, once you convince them God doesn't exist.
I get you said that ironically but that's basically what Moviebob believes.

I'm repeating myself here I know, but Moviebob isn't a leftist in the way your average DSA member is. Moviebob has no problem whatsoever with libertarian economics, he just has a problem with the fact the same party that pushes for them won't let him coom.
 
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