Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Dead Air]

At least Kosmos is a decent rub I guess? It could be some random keto shit from sams club. It's not like it matters anyway since all we'll get is, "It's gud." "I like the spicy one." while he crunches into a rib like an apple. I wonder what these peoples grocery bill is?

 

[Bassomatic]

The grocery bill is probably bigger and smaller than we think. Jack and now seems tam has given up portion control so they eat like animals. But we know jack can't stand his own cooking and he spices it up to protect it from Tammy. So probably eat out a lot more than we know.

But they also probably have a house full of microwave ready meals and half prep shit. Aside his show I don't see mommy wife doing meal prep or from scratch at all. I mean she has a job and jack just sits around drinking coffee with 13 flavors and sugar packets watching cartoons eating. So she probably is fine grabbing a meal for pig boy and her self after a day of work.

But they also seem to buy for buying sake so I don't doubt they get tons of shit they never use, would explain the year old brisket. I like to cook and do pretty well but I can't picture even with 2 normal freezers and a ice chest "forgetting" a brisket. To me that's hoarder behavior.

So yeah while they eat for 7 adults they probably eat out way more. So any guesses on the budget will probably be way off and we know they will never show their spending .. by theirs I mean Tammy's.

I do wonder if DSP who does over 200 a week but dailies door dash 2+ times a day out spends the scarfanis.

 

[Anal birth]

The grocery bill is probably bigger and smaller than we think. Jack and now seems tam has given up portion control so they eat like animals. But we know jack can't stand his own cooking and he spices it up to protect it from Tammy. So probably eat out a lot more than we know.

But they also probably have a house full of microwave ready meals and half prep shit. Aside his show I don't see mommy wife doing meal prep or from scratch at all. I mean she has a job and jack just sits around drinking coffee with 13 flavors and sugar packets watching cartoons eating. So she probably is fine grabbing a meal for pig boy and her self after a day of work.

But they also seem to buy for buying sake so I don't doubt they get tons of shit they never use, would explain the year old brisket. I like to cook and do pretty well but I can't picture even with 2 normal freezers and a ice chest "forgetting" a brisket. To me that's hoarder behavior.

So yeah while they eat for 7 adults they probably eat out way more. So any guesses on the budget will probably be way off and we know they will never show their spending .. by theirs I mean Tammy's.

I do wonder if DSP who does over 200 a week but dailies door dash 2+ times a day out spends the scarfanis.

I'd guess DSP and his mother wife outspend Jack and his mother wife. I doubt either of those couples outspend Wings and smelly Kelly or Amberlynn and her current butler, or Chantal on her own.

 

[ZipDisk]

The intro - he dodges the words as if they are physical, but then he stumbles into them. Poor production quality Jack!

Jack's weather report was oddly compelling, I wanted more of that. Unfortunately it's the shortest part of the video.

Spending half the video on his containers seemed like an odd choice, but he's mad and wasted money, so that's nice.

He seriously sleepwalks through the actual cooking portion of the video. "I want wings, maybe" is the strongest note.

I liked the suggestion that Jack seal the doors and have a nice smokey nap. The garage is a weird mix of organized and stacked, and just dropping shit wherever. I didn't even notice the video was constantly tilted until I saw that screenshot, I guess my brain has filtered out Jack's kludge angles.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

View attachment 3223838
That's over $200 worth of product right there. His spending habits are starting to disgust me more than his cooking.

That is downright crazy right there. I'm sure some of them are good but to order every single one and maybe wind up using two or three while the rest get tossed out... I mean given to the homeless... is just throwing money away. Money that Mushbrain doesn't even have.

The also have a KETOOOOOO variety pack that he did not purchase.

https://kosmosq.com/collections/barbecue-rubs/products/paleo-keto-clean-eating-seasonings-variety-pack

View attachment 3223873

Just more proof that the whole keto thing is a larp.

ice cream cones, with ice cream on it…

WOW! Ice cream cones WITH ice cream? What madness is this? How can they stay in business offering free ice cream cones with actual ice cream in them? /sneed

Of course he'd be all about that. This is the kind of guy that goes to McDonald's and complains that their ice cream maker isn't working. And again that's something that he shouldn't be eating in the first place.

 

[Pig Cups]

Mushbrain has ordered a bunch more crap that he saw on TikTok. Tammy implies she's not happy with how much he got.
View attachment 3223747

I’m surprised Mushbrain hasn’t made some dumb remark about the rub being called “THE BEST RUB,” as if to imply to his braindead followers that Kosmos copied his branding idea. Because he’s stupidly egotistical and self-unaware enough to think that they’d actually believe him.

That is downright crazy right there. I'm sure some of them are good but to order every single one and maybe wind up using two or three while the rest get tossed out...

Nah, he’ll just throw them into the spice hoard that he admits to having, where they’ll just wind up caking in the jars due to humidity and non-use.


Also:

GET YOU SEASONING CABINET

 

[BigDyno392]

I’m surprised Mushbrain hasn’t made some dumb remark about the rub being called “THE BEST RUB,” as if to imply to his braindead followers that Kosmos copied his branding idea. Because he’s stupidly egotistical and self-unaware enough to think that they’d actually believe him.



Nah, he’ll just throw them into the spice hoard that he admits to having, where they’ll just wind up caking in the jars due to humidity and non-use.
View attachment 3225157

Also:
View attachment 3225166
GET YOU SEASONING CABINET

He thinks he's being healthier by replacing the sugary sauces for sodium packed seasonings. Hope he enjoys the kidney disease.

 

[DarkShark]

I’m surprised Mushbrain hasn’t made some dumb remark about the rub being called “THE BEST RUB,” as if to imply to his braindead followers that Kosmos copied his branding idea. Because he’s stupidly egotistical and self-unaware enough to think that they’d actually believe him.



Nah, he’ll just throw them into the spice hoard that he admits to having, where they’ll just wind up caking in the jars due to humidity and non-use.
View attachment 3225157

Also:
View attachment 3225166
GET YOU SEASONING CABINET

How can he reach all that as a one armed manlet?

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

Once Jack Scalfani dies, is it going to be a customized casket funeral or cremation where Jack's ashes sit on top of the mantle?

EDIT: I am imagining Tammy adding some of Jack's best seasoning to his urn to pay respects to Jack and then using Jack's dead ashes to cook some Ribs in one of his Graveyard smokers in the garage.

"Mmmmm. It's good."

 

[Spasticus Autisticus]

Once Jack Scalfani dies, is it going to be a customized casket funeral or cremation where Jack's ashes sit on top of the mantle?

EDIT: I am imagining Tammy adding some of Jack's best seasoning to his urn to pay respects to Jack and then using Jack's dead ashes to cook some Ribs in one of his Graveyard smokers in the garage.

"Mmmmm. It's good."

Jack might be too fat to be cremated. There are safety concerns with cremating a person with a large amount of body fat. Many evangelicals also refuse cremation due to a belief that the body must be intact in order to be resurrected at the rapture.

 

[Pig Cups]

Hope he enjoys the kidney disease.

Compelling. He’s already diabetic, and very likely has hypertension due to his diet and lack of physical activity, among other things.

Maybe the sodium/other lifestyle factors induce kidney failure and he goes the way of Yuri Andropov?

Were this to actually happen, I’d imagine it being similar to the end of an acquaintance of mine whose kidneys failed due to alcoholism. We’d probably see an abrupt radio silence from Jack on social media that never lifts. Amidst this, a distraught Tammy starts providing frequent updates and requesting prayers. This could go on for quite awhile before we get the notification that he’s finally kicked the bucket.

Once Jack Scalfani dies, is it going to be a customized casket funeral or cremation where Jack's ashes sit on top of the mantle?

Why go through all that trouble? Just pull the car up to a landfill.

 

[Joycondrift]

I wonder if poor man’s burnt ends = turkey necks?

View attachment 3222349

I guarantee they're crunchy

 

[Aaway]

Jack might be too fat to be cremated. There are safety concerns with cremating a person with a large amount of body fat. Many evangelicals also refuse cremation due to a belief that the body must be intact in order to be resurrected at the rapture.

lazy man's cremation

 

[Compositesludge]

Once Jack Scalfani dies, is it going to be a customized casket funeral or cremation where Jack's ashes sit on top of the mantle?

EDIT: I am imagining Tammy adding some of Jack's best seasoning to his urn to pay respects to Jack and then using Jack's dead ashes to cook some Ribs in one of his Graveyard smokers in the garage.

"Mmmmm. It's good."

Jack would never want to be cooked so thoroughly.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

It's now Thursday in most of the US and still no JOTG. So much for Mondays and Wednesdays! Fatty made it almost two full weeks on the new schedule, maybe his kidneys gave out already?

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

It's now Thursday in most of the US and still no JOTG. So much for Mondays and Wednesdays! Fatty made it almost two full weeks on the new schedule.

Just imagine how dedicated and organized Jack will be in the month of June with his "Julia in June" videos.

 

[ZipDisk]

I still want a proctor for the June challenge who hurts jack when he fucks up. We don't get as much of Jack burning himself lately.
Maybe they could spray windex in his eyes.

 

[DX10]

Will Jack get a Happening when he finally croaks?

 

[10 Sheep]

Will Jack get a Happening when he finally croaks?

no, because the wendigo has rendered him immortal. even if his inner parts die off, the wendigo will keep the husk of scalfani alive as long as it can get its fill of raw, bloody MEAT

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

no, because the wendigo has rendered him immortal. even if his inner parts die off, the wendigo will keep the husk of scalfani alive as long as it can get its fill of raw, bloody MEAT

Jack is literally a draugr at this point. My theory is that he "died" sometime between now and stroke number two. The glowing blue eyes will become more obvious in a few months.