My stainless steel buttplug is picking up AM radio stations in my asshole - I hear Baptist sermons all day long

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

How can I upgrade it to an FM superheterodyne technology so my anus can play MANDATORY METALLICA ONLY ON I HEART RADIO A CLEARSTREAM MEDIA(tm) STATION?

 

[Nikes_JustDoIt]

Does the music come out of your mouth or butt?

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

Does the music come out of your mouth or butt?

yes

 

[Usb2200a]

You should take that shit out of your ass and listen to those sermons.
There’s a snowballs chance in hell it might set you right but at least you won’t be sodomising yourself.

 

[Queen Elizabeth II]

Upload pictures of the malfunctioning device in situ so we can perform a full assessment.

 

[Vingle]

What will you do with your new superpower?

 

[GHTD]

Can you pick up on MEXICAN WHOOOA RADIOOOOO?

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

Can you pick up Art Bell shows?

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

What will you do with your new superpower?

TBH receiving messages from Jesus in your butthole is not really a superpower.

 

[Vingle]

TBH receiving messages from Jesus in your butthole is not really a superpower.

 

[byuu]

FM broadcasts on roughly double the frequency than AM radio so you need to saw your buttplug in half to match the wavelength.

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

FM broadcasts on roughly double the frequency than AM radio so you need to saw your buttplug in half to match the wavelength.

Yes but I lack the proper demodulator can you code me a cycle accurate one

 

[Testacles Maximus]

Get a rusty one to pick up FM.

 

[byuu]

Yes but I lack the proper demodulator can you code me a cycle accurate one

Just shake your ass a 100 million times a second to match the carrier wave.

 

[A-Stump]

I'm reporting you to the FCC.

Farts 'n Cum Committee

 

[UncleFezziesPantsPuppet]

See, if you want to listen to FM, you’re going to have to have a Guatemalan ejaculate onto said butt plug. Don’t ask me why, but Guatemalan semen seems to be more effective than your basic household Czechoslovakian semen.

 

[Nader's Branch]

I think you should be more concerned about whether or not it vibrates.

 

[JethroTullamore]

Try rotating it to see if you get different stations.

 

[Latvophile]

Try listening to gospel while sucking a male prostitute off who lives 250 miles away. Afterwards, go back home entirely naked, insert a metal rod (conductive of electricity) into the back of your arse all while you're still listening, condense it in cold water, and then back yourself into a wall plug so that the rod enters the socket. If you live in a country that uses plug switches, flick it on and off twelve times at the exact rate of 1 switch flick per 250 milliseconds.

Congrats, you have achieved fuck all except turning yourself into a sin-committing Minecraft-flipper.

 

[Epic Fail Man]

pay $9.99 a month for anal Spotify on your bathplug for diarrhea inducing high quality audio and bowel moving music selection.