Best of Corporate Pride Month Items - Gotta get me some of that demographic money, right boys?

[Android raptor]

It's simpler than that. Traditionally gay couples are two working adults with no kids, or DINKs. They have more money to spend than families with kids. It's a no-brainer to appeal to that market. Making a t-shirt for straights costs as much as making one pandering to gays so why not do it one month a year. But the shift now of pandering to younger, broker, gender special millennials is a mistake.

The gays want one thing, the angry straights want another. The truth lies in the middle. I worked at Target when they made a big deal about not "gender coding" toys cause boys can play with Barbies and girls can play with GI Joe. We got a lot of angry phone calls about it from concerned parents lamenting the gay agenda. The truth of the matter was the backing paper was changed in the aisles from pink or blue to a more neutral color and we told them as such. The moral of the story is "do something minor, tell people what they want to hear, and sell them more stuff. Be neutral capitalist."

Anyway, content:
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"Move I'm Gay"
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A lot of the clothes are just terrible because of busy rainbow designs. But this is one is a classic awful design cause of the new shit they added:
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They of course pick some ugly, brown models but this guy takes the cake :
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God, that pride flag design with the brown and trans stripes will never not look like the busy clusterfuck bad sparkledog Mary Sue of pride flags.

Also I guarentee most of the people seeking out that flag in specific are spicy straights, probably white genderspecial NLOGs in particular.

 

[Johnathan E.]

They of course pick some ugly, brown models but this guy takes the cake

ITS MAAM

 

[Waifuwars]

Seaking of detering attention, less hideous pride shirts might be worth trying as a means of deterring dudes from hitting on me I guess. Idk I think that's the main reason I'd wear one as a home of sexual individual.

You might end up attracting other kinds of attention with this kind of merch. Instead of bros you might get creeped on by some fe(males). Plus, none of this stuff is worth wasting your money on. Save your money and make your own

 

[Education Lottery]

It's simpler than that. Traditionally gay couples are two working adults with no kids, or DINKs. They have more money to spend than families with kids. It's a no-brainer to appeal to that market. Making a t-shirt for straights costs as much as making one pandering to gays so why not do it one month a year. But the shift now of pandering to younger, broker, gender special millennials is a mistake.

I remember when gay/pride-focused things (excluding books, zines, and other printed material) were higher-quality boutique items created within the gay community. There was also more focus on experiences, like parties and retreats where people could take their lovers and be more open with their relationship around likeminded people. This also extends to services around the community, which were important.
None of these even attempt to reach into that essence, and lack the cheeky inside-joke charm that those items did; this all feels like faghag and LARPs of the terminally online-inspired junk. What's even more funny is that they're marketing to a broke market that's already too broke to buy this. They usually stop at pronoun pins and call it a day.

Edit: forgot to mention da bidness

 

[Vingle]

ITS MAAM

Yea, those "nipples" looks suspicious. I don't believe it's just a "dad body"

 

[Johnathan E.]

she has the classic sidhdhbd scars

 

[Neurotypical Mantis]

Idk if they were in a store when I was a kid I'd probably buy one in a heartbeat to try and deter creepy adult attention.

Speaking of detering attention, less hideous pride shirts might be worth trying as a means of deterring dudes from hitting on me I guess. Idk I think that's the main reason I'd wear one as a home of sexual individual.

nah wear the more hideous ones. it'll work.

 

[Fartificial Insmelligence]

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Crystal Head vodka.

Even though Dan Akroyd is nuts, I do like the regular version of this vodka. It has a sweet aftertaste to it. I do think the rainbow skull looks pretty, it'd be cool with some LED lights in it, but since it's part of the gay for June thing- nah.

I have one of the regular skulls, it works well as a coinbank (I only have it 'cuz someone left it at a CoinStar haha)

 

[Goonon]

"Move I'm Gay"

I'm willing to bet that one is in reference to this video, though the type of person to wear shirts like that probably won't mean it as a joke

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

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Funko is shameless..

I mean what exactly can you expect from something that will be in a landfill in a few short years?

 

[MysticMisty]

I worked at Target when they made a big deal about not "gender coding" toys cause boys can play with Barbies and girls can play with GI Joe.

As a chick that grew up in the 90's and had everyone from classmates to my own childhood best friend tell me that I can't like Star Wars "Because you're a girl" I'm actually fine with this, so long as you don't make a big production about it.

I mean what exactly can you expect from something that will be in a landfill in a few short years?

Last time I was in the local secondhand media shop that primarily sells books, but also has everything from old games to VHS tapes musical instruments, they had a whole fuckton of these. Judging by how many there were, and how no one was even giving that aisle a second glance, I'd say we're pretty much there, as much as Funko desperately wants to pretend otherwise.

 

[Monolith]

Lesbian here.

Stick straight in place of all this ghey shit and see/hear how Goddamn STOOPID all this is. If you're partnered up...YOU DON'T NEED THE "COMMUNITY!!"
Not unless your entire personality, likes and dislikes are: Ghey or straight. But WHOSE is (Besides Hambutt and NoNecky).

Lemme use a straight to drive the point home. If a straight person gets a boyfriend/girlfriend, fiancee, or spouse...imagine the straight pride. Straight bar, straight parade, straight pride tee, straight necklace, straight pinback collection, straight straight straightety straight straight.

Annnd that's what you see with faggot pride and faggot Target.

By the way...those models all look like they smell like feet, cornchips, armpits and frumunda cheese. The jaundiced white niggers don't help with the phantom smell either.

super straights are oppressed though

 

[Return of the Freaker]

They of course pick some ugly, brown models but this guy takes the cake :

Dios mio, la creatura...

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Delaited]

Last time I was in the local secondhand media shop that primarily sells books, but also has everything from old games to VHS tapes musical instruments, they had a whole fuckton of these. Judging by how many there were, and how no one was even giving that aisle a second glance, I'd say we're pretty much there, as much as Funko desperately wants to pretend otherwise.

Funko Pops are thrown in with the pile of plastic kids’ toys at my local Goodwills. I’ve never seen a kid going for a Funko Pop because they don’t do anything and aren’t pretty like the very few dolls they ever have (I blame doll resellers snagging anything that isn’t a Barbie or Dollar Tree doll; there’s a large doll customizer community online)

I used to have a few Star Wars Funkos and a Doctor Strange one back when working in an office was a thing, but I got rid of all of them at a Goodwill except for Rebels Ahsoka. I realized they were all so ugly, but Ahsoka didn’t have any realistic figures at the time.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

As a chick that grew up in the 90's and had everyone from classmates to my own childhood best friend tell me that I can't like Star Wars "Because you're a girl" I'm actually fine with this, so long as you don't make a big production about it.

Well you still can't like Star Wars because it sucks and is lame.

Also that's retarded. Who cares if somebody likes something or not?

 

[LikeRivenIRL]

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Ugly garbage. Why 5 rainbows? Why dirty-coloured chevrons? What a clusterfuck.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

Fellow blue county dweller (red state however) and last year the Pride shit was front and center at the main entrance, and hardly anything sold, was eventually tucked into the back on clearance and still wasn't selling even in August. This year I noticed they still have some things (mostly ugly shirts), but it's tucked back from the entrance. It's "there", but just barely, and they're clearly hoping no one will notice before it gets shoved to the clearance section again later this summer.

Reminds me of all the US Women's Soccer Team world championship merchandise.
I saw an endcap of it in either a Target or a Walmart all on super markdown and the boxes had literal dust on them.
Looks like it hadn't been touched since they were placed there.

 

[MysticMisty]

Also that's retarded. Who cares if somebody likes something or not?

Because kids are judgy pieces of shit. And I guess the guys didn't want to "share" their interests with girls because girls are icky and boring. And the other girls didn't like girls being into things that guys are into because "you're not supposed to like those things". At least that was the answer my childhood best friend gave when she was shocked that I dared to like "boy things".

 

[Fialovy]

Because kids are judgy pieces of shit. And I guess the guys didn't want to "share" their interests with girls because girls are icky and boring. And the other girls didn't like girls being into things that guys are into because "you're not supposed to like those things". At least that was the answer my childhood best friend gave when she was shocked that I dared to like "boy things".

I had the same problem of boys excluding me, but that all changed in high school when they were all like "Sure, you can hang out with us, infact we would love for you to." as it made you like, 20 percent hotter for liking those things.