Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[REGENDarySumanai]

Jynx is pretty fat. There's also Miltank which is a cow, like Patrick himself.

No wonder his wife likes Tauros.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Are there any other fat pokemon? Funny to imagine him as snorlax but that's already reserved for everyones favourite dementia riddled rape victim.

There are, but the problem is finding Pokemon that match both Patrick's substantial girth and attitude. Still, I made a list:

• Lickitung and its evolution, Lickilicky. Both are fat (144lbs and 308lbs, respectively), and both share his dopey expression.
• Swalot. While not as fat as Patrick (tipping the scales at 176lbs), it eats literally anything that can fit in its mouth, much like our prize piggy.
• Garbador. A literal mountain of trash, bloated up to 236lbs. Again, nowhere near Fat's size, but an apt metaphor for him.
• Jellicent. It is quite substantial in both height (7 feet tall) and weight (296lbs), but it shares Fat's habit of preying on people (Jellicent like sailors the same way Pat likes negro boys.)
• Guzzlord. This, I think, is the closest to Patrick's size, weighing in at a whopping 1957lbs. It looks much better than he does, though.

I think I've earned those puzzle pieces now.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Mass shooting in Wisconsin just now. I wonder if the murder scene smells of pepperoni.

 

[get-tar manajerk]

There are, but the problem is finding Pokemon that match both Patrick's substantial girth and attitude. Still, I made a list:

• Lickitung and its evolution, Lickilicky. Both are fat (144lbs and 308lbs, respectively), and both share his dopey expression.
• Swalot. While not as fat as Patrick (tipping the scales at 176lbs), it eats literally anything that can fit in its mouth, much like our prize piggy.
• Garbador. A literal mountain of trash, bloated up to 236lbs. Again, nowhere near Fat's size, but an apt metaphor for him.
• Jellicent. It is quite substantial in both height (7 feet tall) and weight (296lbs), but it shares Fat's habit of preying on people (Jellicent like sailors the same way Pat likes negro boys.)
• Guzzlord. This, I think, is the closest to Patrick's size, weighing in at a whopping 1957lbs. It looks much better than he does, though.

I think I've earned those puzzle pieces now.

Jesus christ. I've heard of likitung. I can't tell if the new pokemon names are retarded (guzzlord?) or if they'd all sound just as retarded if I was first exposed to them at my age. I think they're retarded and I should start an autistic campaign against nintendo about how all these new pokemon cause me "sensory overload" and how LIKITUNG DOESN'T EVOVLVE and then mace a gamestop employee.

Mass shooting in Wisconsin just now. I wonder if the murder scene smells of pepperoni.

He can't keep getting away with this. Maybe he tweeted the FBI so much they chose him as the next mentally ill white person to coax into committing mass murder.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Jesus christ. I've heard of likitung. I can't tell if the new pokemon names are retarded (guzzlord?) or if they'd all sound just as retarded if I was first exposed to them at my age.

All Pokemon names are retarded. This is a franchise meant for children and adults who got a 1.7 (1.2) GPA in college.

 

[TerminalTryHard]

All Pokemon names are retarded. This is a franchise meant for children and adults who got a 1.7 (1.2) GPA in college.

Actually I think Pokemon might be to complex for Pat. The games do require basic reading skills and critical thinking , and Pat has neither.

 

[get-tar manajerk]

I really do wonder wtf he was doing. Kids who come to class totally stoned everyday get better marks. Was he was just drooling on a piece of paper and handing it in? Or just telling the teacher, "I'm smarter than you, child" and sitting in class doing nothing. Probably both.

I also agree that RPG type games, even ones aimed at kids, are harder to fully master strategy wise than grade 9 classes so I doubt Pat plays any video games at all. He consooooms star trek and the never ending star wars garbage and probably marvel movies too for a reason and that reason is illiteracy (obesity likely also plays a factor as he would need special hardware for his fat sausage fingers.

 

[Dean Pentel]

Mass shooting in Wisconsin just now. I wonder if the murder scene smells of pepperoni.

View attachment 3347304

Have we ever seen Fat Pat fire a weapon? Sure we've seen him playing with one like he thinks he's a Bollywood action star, but actually using one? He acts as if he's some sort of competent fighting man but I've never seen any proof.

We have seen proof of stuff he's actually a master at: lying terribly and calling people silly names when immediately caught, being unemployed and useless, being an alcoholic, being delusional, being an amateur black sausage enthusiast, being an absolute failure of a man at nearly everything.

And being fat. Goddamn is he so, so fat.

Had to edit because turns out I made an oopsie doodles.

 

[AnOminous]

We have seen proof of stuff he's actually a master at: lying, being unemployed and useless, being an alcoholic, being delusional, being an amateur black sausage enthusiast, being an absolute failure of a man at nearly everything.

He's bad at lying, though, unless you mean lying badly. Being a master at lying implies being believed. He can stand there being fat right at you and tell you he's a svelte buffed Chad.

There is one thing he's truly a huge success at, though, and that's being fat.

Ninja.

 

[get-tar manajerk]

We have seen proof of stuff he's actually a master at: lying

I disagree. A master of lying would be able to deceive. You're not really a good liar if what you say is immediately refuted with government documents, court transcripts, court audio etc. Only person he's deceived is himself and whoever at the sci fi writers special club listened to him ramble about being "stalked" (another word he doesn't know the definition of) and decided funding his lawsuit is a good idea.

 

[Pickle Built]

Had to edit because turns out I made an oopsie doodles

I know it's rarely pointed out but his weight very alarming

 

[Mr Moonface]

Extremely important fence update, there was a 'meeting to clarify' that took place on the 27th of May. I imagine that piggy tried to 'no child' the city of Milwaukee.



Despite this, the inspection is still scheduled for the 17th of June.

 

[AnOminous]

Extremely important fence update, there was a 'meeting to clarify' that took place on the 27th of May. I imagine that piggy tried to 'no child' the city of Milwaukee.

They had to clarify that they're the government and he's a fat mongoloid and he fixes the fence or he gets fucked.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

They had to clarify that they're the government and he's a fat mongoloid and he fixes the fence or he gets fucked.

I’m as anti-state as they come and this thrills me to no end. Get rekt, Pat, and you’re not getting a deadline extension just because you’re retarded.

 

[Hey Fatrick FUCK YOU]

Extremely important fence update, there was a 'meeting to clarify' that took place on the 27th of May. I imagine that piggy tried to 'no child' the city of Milwaukee.

View attachment 3347862

Despite this, the inspection is still scheduled for the 17th of June.

View attachment 3347865

He likely showed them the OnAForums and kiwifarms thread. The inspector was likely bewildered as to why this fat fuck thinks he doesn't have to follow building codes just because there's a community on the internet who laughs at every one of his stupid moves

 

[AnOminous]

He likely showed them the OnAForums and kiwifarms thread. The inspector was likely bewildered as to why this fat fuck thinks he doesn't have to follow building codes just because there's a community on the internet who laughs at every one of his stupid moves

Such a Chris-Chan move. He probably pulled "do you KNOW who I AM little baby chiiiild?" And then "I'm kind of a big deal on the Internet." I can honestly imagine Rick showing people his blue checkmark on his phone to show how important he is.

 

[A Sunset]

In a universe full of uncertainties, there are few constants. I can take solace that one of those constants is Fatrick being clinically obese, and a failed writer. No matter where life takes me, I can return to this thread and know Fatrick will still be fat, sperging out on Twitter, and failing to make income off book sales. This will never change.

Thank you, Fatrick, for the comfortable permanence of your obesity, endless failures, and Low-IQ retard takes.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

Thanks. I'm still cutting back on capping his twitter. I'm only capturing things that add to Pat lore or that are really funny. Speaking of which, he tweeted this about an hour ago. Not sure if this rate of rejection is industry standard. Any writers want to comment?

View attachment 3344028

I wonder if he wrote responses back to all those rejection letters.

 

[AnOminous]

In a universe full of uncertainties, there are few constants. I can take solace that one of those constants is Fatrick being clinically obese, and a failed writer. No matter where life takes me, I can return to this thread and know Fatrick will still be fat, sperging out on Twitter, and failing to make income off book sales. This will never change.

Thank you, Fatrick, for the comfortable permanence of your obesity, endless failures, and Low-IQ retard takes.

It is often a speculation in science fiction that every possibility that could happen does happen, but potential universes split off at each of these branchings.

It is a fun fact that in none of these is Fat Rick a respected writer, or not obese, because even though the number of universes is infinite, it only includes those that are possible.

I thought that was interesting.

 

[thismanlies]

Such a Chris-Chan move. He probably pulled "do you KNOW who I AM little baby chiiiild?" And then "I'm kind of a big deal on the Internet." I can honestly imagine Rick showing people his blue checkmark on his phone to show how important he is.

Sir, that blue checkmark is just a sticker you put on your phone. Now get away from me. You smell like cheap beer and... pepperoni.