Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Uber driver reviewer]

I think he had 5.7 weapons because of CS 1.6 had it. In real life, it’s an underwhelming round because only the low velocity ammo is available.

Concerning H&K, they won’t make it because their MP7 lost out to the P90 in a NATO testing of the PDW calibers in Web 1.0 times. They won’t admit the 4.6 sucks and plaster pictures of Navy SEALS using them on their social media to get SWAT teams to buy them. H&K may make some really good weapons but they are obnoxious people when it comes to their failed products.

They are all firearms for autists. These are autism guns. You would know if you ever encountered a 5.7 enthusiasts. They zealots. They are the Tesla owners of guns.

HK isn’t shit. They really don’t do anything special. They are just another mass produced plastic mold injection handgun. Their product lines are long lived are good and have long product runs though.

FN is mass produced shit too. Too much plastic and cast junk. Also very inconsistent with their product lines over time. They will ditch an entire failed product line one week, and reintroduce a completely different ho-hum firearm to the same market segment a week later

Then you have Sig Sauer the most Jewish gun company ever. Full of Indian castings and not drop safe. Of course they are now locking up giant governmental contracts because Jews They are as shadow of their former selves when they made the old alloy frame and stamped slide masterpiece of reliable combat arms. Now it’s garbage you get to pay for via taxes. Because Jews.


Just buy glocks. They are not sexy but they work and anyone can work on them. They are remarkably fast shooting and fast on target once you get a chance to really learn how to get into a fight with them. Very serviceable, consistent designs, and you can adapt to them. Don’t let people make you feel bad for buying a Glock. They don’t shoot enough to bother giving a shit what they say. Lowtax wouldn’t be getting made fun of even more for his gun choices if he had eaten a mouthful of .357SIG from a Glock 31. They wouldn’t had even batted an eye. But we get to instead make fun of his autistic choice of the stupid 5.7

 

[AmpleApricots]

I think Shmorky did it

 

[POWER IN MISERY]

I think Shmorky did it

he's still out there, and his ex still thinks it's about her.

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

They are all firearms for autists. These are autism guns. You would know if you ever encountered a 5.7 enthusiasts. They zealots. They are the Tesla owners of guns.

LowT should've used a Deagle. The OG autism gun, and it would be very

 

[Thumb Butler]

I think Shmorky did it

Imagine the last thing you hear is a shmorkified "Hello Richard!".

Then silence.

 

[Spunt]

"Well Done, Shmorky-Seven, you did a very good job in that aspect of the scenario."

 

[AnOminous]

LowT should've used a Deagle. The OG autism gun, and it would be very

He should have dual wielded Deagles like a true man and shot himself in both temples simultaneously.

 

[AmpleApricots]

Imagine the last thing you hear is a shmorkified "Hello Richard!".

"Remember me Richard? When I killed our channel I talked JUST LIKE THIS!"

 

[Muskcarpone]

Smorky disguised himself as a tranny hooker, shat on Richard's glass table and just as Rich started sucking his toes, he took of his wig, pulled out a gun and screeched "Surprise, baby!"

 

[Thumb Butler]

Smorky disguised himself as a tranny hooker, shat on Richard's glass table and just as Rich started sucking his toes, he took of his wig, pulled out a gun and screeched "Surprise, baby!"

Did Lowtax ever made Smorky shit all on the SA office table? @Lowtax, please reply.

 

[Tanner Glass]

Did Lowtax ever made Smorky shit all on the SA office table? @Lowtax, please reply.

I don't think he's going to reply.

 

[Amazing Criminal]

I don't think he's going to reply.

Only @Sir Conrad of Jersey knows, and she's squirrelshit crazy.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

I don't think he's going to reply.

What makes you say that?

 

[Maude Snew]

Smorky disguised himself as a tranny hooker, shat on Richard's glass table and just as Rich started sucking his toes, he took of his wig, pulled out a gun and screeched "Surprise, baby!"

Took off the good wig to reveal a second, much shittier wig.

 

[BlueSpark]

"We can't put all that on the tombstone if your budget is only tenbux, it's $1.25 a letter... How about just 'cuck dead' or 'mangosteen'?"

 

[Idiot Asshole]

It was Fragmaster. Draped with toilet paper on his head, he revealed that he was a terrorist before blowing Rich's brains out with an AK-47.
It was still less damage than Lowtax had done to SA's codebase.

 

[RapidUnplannedDisassembly]

Imagining that Lowtax is in hell and getting pineapple-sodomized by a homunculus that looks like ebaum while his mother is looking on strapped into a Clockwork Orange viewing chair is the right and morally correct reaction to all of this to this very day.

I still hope all his daughters can turn out alright from all this.

 

[Ghostse]

Imagining that Lowtax is in hell and getting pineapple-sodomized by a homunculus that looks like ebaum while his mother is looking on strapped into a Clockwork Orange viewing chair is the right and morally correct reaction to all of this to this very day.

I still hope all his daughters can turn out alright from all this.

If not, the OF profile will provide us all with some slightly uncomfortable laughs.

 

[seri0us]

I know years ago he had an AR-15, I remember seeing a picture him holding it. He also claimed he owned a H&K 9mm pistol, and a .45.

Edit: I found the pic from this old front page article from 2003 https://www.somethingawful.com/news/taxation-with-insultation/

And I attached the pic for those of you who don't feel like clicking on links. View attachment 3398616

TIP #1: DON'T ALLOW PEOPLE TO GIVE YOU MONEY. EVER. This is one of the most crucial aspects to keeping a low tax profile. One of the easiest ways to refuse people giving you money is by killing yourself, but some people find themselves uncomfortable with this long-term solution, as it greatly hinders their ability to bitch about upcoming Star Wars movies. On the positive side, this makes tax filing infinitely easier, as zero plus zero will always equal zero, unless you use the Metric System, in which case you'll owe the government something like 50,271 megawatts per kilometer.

Huh.

 

[polonium]

If not, the OF profile will provide us all with some slightly uncomfortable wanks.

FTFY