Kevin Gibes / Kathryn Gibes / TransSalamander / RageTreb / The Green Salamander - "Am hole:" The epitomized Twitter MtF you thought was just a myth! Donate to his Transformers toy fund today!

[the luckiest number]

I mean, there's quite a few people on the tranch, no? I'd like to say that's an appropriately stocked "bar" for someone who might like to entertain or make a drink a couple nights a week, but I don't think anyone's hosting the tranch. I'm not super familiar with alcohol brands or whatever, but the big frosted bottle front and center is definitely a Grey Goose vodka. If Phil is an alcoholic, I wonder what fuels it more: his festering crotch wound, or the company of these thumbs? (Actually, I can't recall - did Phil just get the weird ball removal surgery or does he have an amhole? Can't remember. Orchiectomy it's called, I think.)

Phil had an orchiechtomy, yes. He's got a the carrot but no peas.

Those are cheap bottles of booze, just a step above bum status. They clearly buy them from Sam's or Costco, along with their frozen meals and burrito night ingredients. I can't stress how much (as a cocktail enthusiast) this reads like a frat house stocking up for a party. They have stuff to make liquor x mixer. That's it. It doesn't surprise me that this is how they drink, or realistically, how Penny drinks, since it's cheap and easy. But it's just so...masculine. Female friends who drink will have the stuff to make their favorite cocktail, or maybe a wine they like, not a massive stash.

Tldr; Penny has a bunch of cheap booze and he uses it to numb the pain of his life.

 

[RazorBackBacon]

His commitment to self-uglification is impressive.

I think that's just "kuweer!" culture at this point. Rejection of the mainstream has become so endemic and extreme that looking like a giant trash goblin that doesn't bath and can't dress yourself is considered desirable.

 

[Super Shiro]

Phil had an orchiechtomy, yes. He's got a the carrot but no peas.

Those are cheap bottles of booze, just a step above bum status. They clearly buy them from Sam's or Costco, along with their frozen meals and burrito night ingredients. I can't stress how much (as a cocktail enthusiast) this reads like a frat house stocking up for a party. They have stuff to make liquor x mixer. That's it. It doesn't surprise me that this is how they drink, or realistically, how Penny drinks, since it's cheap and easy. But it's just so...masculine. Female friends who drink will have the stuff to make their favorite cocktail, or maybe a wine they like, not a massive stash.

Tldr; Penny has a bunch of cheap booze and he uses it to numb the pain of his life.

I wonder just how much said cheap liquor is going to affect their already male bodies. Nothing more feminine than a beer gut on THIS tranch, ladies!

 

[Piss Bear]

Phil had an orchiechtomy, yes. He's got a the carrot but no peas.

Those are cheap bottles of booze, just a step above bum status. They clearly buy them from Sam's or Costco, along with their frozen meals and burrito night ingredients. I can't stress how much (as a cocktail enthusiast) this reads like a frat house stocking up for a party. They have stuff to make liquor x mixer. That's it. It doesn't surprise me that this is how they drink, or realistically, how Penny drinks, since it's cheap and easy. But it's just so...masculine. Female friends who drink will have the stuff to make their favorite cocktail, or maybe a wine they like, not a massive stash.

Tldr; Penny has a bunch of cheap booze and he uses it to numb the pain of his life.

The sky is blue. Kevin has a massive transformers collection and is a coomer. Water is wet. Phil drinks like a slobbish alcoholic. Bears shit in the woods. Jen is highly aggressive towards everyone ‘anonymously’ online because he is a weakling in real life.

What I’m trying to say is men will be men. No I’m not implying all men are like this. These are severely mentally ill men.

Is this the tall lanky brunette male that Kevvy was lusting over recently? I did a cursory glance through dude's Twitter and I can't figure out how tall he is. But yeah, Kevvy doesn't interact that much with icky cis men, and this one was visiting (and doesn't seem repulsed outright by Kevvy, which we know in Kevvyverse is tantamount to lust).

Notice how he doesn’t overtly flirt with cis males on Twitter like he does with MtF trannies. He might be stupid, but he’s not stupid enough to get all coomer-y over a cis man in public. He’d get his face caved in.

 

[AfghanBlue]

View attachment 3460774

Alcoholism isn't funny. Except for this situation. Now we know how Penny can stand being around the lazy layabouts after doing terrible drywall jobs all day.

Also, I feel like since getting dumped by Neck and Wedge Kevvy is reaaaaaally leaning into his setup with Phil and Jen - posting way more photos with them all lovey. Guess he realized no one else will put up with his shit other than a functional alcoholic and a coprophile.

There was me thinking this was a lolforehead photo

 

[Fetish Roulette]

The Tranch had a meeting with a journalist
View attachment 3461037View attachment 3461038
Tweet | Archive

The positive media attention the Tranch gets never ceases to amaze me. Anyone with two eyes can see the place is a dumpster fire from goddamn outer space, and yet the tone of all of the coverage normies see of this place ranges from "positive" to "worshipful." I mean, we've already done all of the hard work for them going back two and a half years- why not include some footage of the alpaca shed of death, or that deathtrap steel staircase they had installed, or their outdoor "shower"? Why not shine a light on Kindness' bird alter? Why not show the masses some footage of Jen, just doing Jen stuff? Are the people that media outlets send to cover Tranch shit actually so hopelessly urbanized that they think that all of the crumbling infrastructure and blatant mental illness is indicative of a functioning rural homestead? Ultimately, all they're doing is sending anyone with the least bit of curiosity about what's actually going on to the Farms.

 

[Super Shiro]

The positive media attention the Tranch gets never ceases to amaze me. Anyone with two eyes can see the place is a dumpster fire from goddamn outer space, and yet the tone of all of the coverage normies see of this place ranges from "positive" to "worshipful." I mean, we've already done all of the hard work for them going back two and a half years- why not include some footage of the alpaca shed of death, or that deathtrap steel staircase they had installed, or their outdoor "shower"? Why not shine a light on Kindness' bird alter? Why not show the masses some footage of Jen, just doing Jen stuff? Are the people that media outlets send to cover Tranch shit actually so hopelessly urbanized that they think that all of the crumbling infrastructure and blatant mental illness is indicative of a functioning rural homestead? Ultimately, all they're doing is sending anyone with the least bit of curiosity about what's actually going on to the Farms.

I'm shocked I've never seen this before even though it's nearly a year old by now! But, anyway, I can't say that I'm "amazed" by the coverage. It's one of those subjects that makes a great headline and people are very unlikely to look into. If you're knowledgeable on the ranch, you know the animals aren't cared for, and it's nothing but a vanity project. If you're someone merely browsing who comes across the story, it's an inspirational story about transgender women rising above their oppression to achieve greatness! Now since that's out of the way, I just want to share a few comments under that video just for fun:

Spoiler: tranch youtube comments that I don't want to clog up the thread with for people browsing.

I wonder how the viewers would react upon seeing how the animals are treated and how the tranchers act outside the lens of a camera?

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

I am legit curious what trans discourse will look like in five or ten years. We already went from “nobody is claiming sex isn’t real, TERFs” to “a person can resemble and function like a man in every single way and still be female, TERFs.”

 

[Faglock Holmes]

I am legit curious what trans discourse will look like in five or ten years. We already went from “nobody is claiming sex isn’t real, TERFs” to “a person can resemble and function like a man in every single way and still be female, TERFs.”

On one hand, I am sick of hearing about the newest troon logical fallacies, but on the other, I can’t say I am terribly excited to find out what the next fetish to reach “protected” status will be.

 

[T.E.R.F]

Uhh Phil might very well be an alcoholic but that photo definitely doesn’t prove it. It’s a ghetto way to store / arrange your alcohol but there’s nothing remarkable about having some bottles of liquor around the house.

 

[Schatzi Katze]

View attachment 3460774

Alcoholism isn't funny. Except for this situation. Now we know how Penny can stand being around the lazy layabouts after doing terrible drywall jobs all day.

I know its just cheap-ass convenience store wine, but the fact that they have a bottle of Menage a Trois on the counter is still mildly humorous.

 

[MissAnthropist]

Uhh Phil might very well be an alcoholic but that photo definitely doesn’t prove it. It’s a ghetto way to store / arrange your alcohol but there’s nothing remarkable about having some bottles of liquor around the house.

I mean, fair, but those bottles all appear empty, and based on their housekeeping I'm just doubting this is the only corner full of empty booze bottles. The only people I've known with this kinda bottle corner are functional alcoholics or live in a frat house (not that the dome isn't basically a frat house).

 

[T.E.R.F]

I mean, fair, but those bottles all appear empty, and based on their housekeeping I'm just doubting this is the only corner full of empty booze bottles. The only people I've known with this kinda bottle corner are functional alcoholics or live in a frat house (not that the dome isn't basically a frat house).

I can’t really tell if they’re empty and I don’t think alcoholics who rely on begging for income are buying bottles of grey goose. Kevin seems like a pothead and Penny at least does some work so he’s not getting drunk all day. I mean he could be but I don’t think it’s any surefire assumption. They don’t seem to mention drinking much. I just don’t think “Penny is an alcoholic” should become some kind of thread canon based on one photo.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Wedge got some complication with his amhole
View attachment 3461042
Tweet | Archive

Imagine. My, Shock

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

They don’t seem to mention drinking much. I just don’t think “Penny is an alcoholic” should become some kind of thread canon based on one photo.

Watch as it becomes canon to the Kiwi Cinematic Universe because of it’s inclusion in Ultimate Tranch.

 

[NOT THE BEEEEES!]

On one hand, I am sick of hearing about the newest troon logical fallacies, but on the other, I can’t say I am terribly excited to find out what the next fetish to reach “protected” status will be.

Probably kid diddlers.

I know its just cheap-ass convenience store wine, but the fact that they have a bottle of Menage a Trois on the counter is still mildly humorous.

View attachment 3462871

I’m sure they did that on purpose. None of the Tranchers look like red wine drinkers, so that bottle’s probably just for show.

 

[MissAnthropist]

Watch as it becomes canon to the Kiwi Cinematic Universe because of it’s inclusion in Ultimate Tranch.

We make observations about shit all the time that we have little evidence of, and alcoholism is notoriously subjective. To me, a group drinking that much has some issues, even if it's not everyone's definition of alcoholism. I guess I could have said lol drinking problem, but it's just not as punchy sounding. Plus I bet it would piss Phil off to be called an alcoholic, so that's fun too.

TBH, I don't take anything here as any kind of solid truth about any of these people. As good as Farmers are at digging things up, we undeniably have only part of the story for every one of our lolcows. We know a few facts and then we've filled in a lot of blanks with things that are funny and in character based on what we know and what we can parse out from Twitter.

So anyway, point is, calling him an alcoholic is funny and I don't care if it's technically true by whatever definition is being used. Jen also probably doesn't exclusively eat shit, but it's still funnier to say he does.

 

[scallion]

Having a collection of liquor and wine is normal, simply having it doesn't necessarily imply they're guzzing it every single night.

 

[BallBuster]

I know its just cheap-ass convenience store wine, but the fact that they have a bottle of Menage a Trois on the counter is still mildly humorous.

View attachment 3462871

It's a very common red table wine sold nearly everywhere. My Costco sells it so I am sure that is where they got it. As for the rest of the booze, I mean it is booze. Most people have some kind of bottle out on a counter or a bar. Think we are trying to turn one of the few common and normal things they have on display into something way more than it is.

 

[Boris Blank's glass eye]

None of the Tranchers look like red wine drinkers, so that bottle’s probably just for show.

IIRC Paul "Bonnie" "Boner" "Gordo" "Mantits Mandozer" Mendoza posted about wine a couple times. None of the rest look like serious wine enthusiasts.
Except for Jarrod who looks like a bumwine aficionado.