Prison Letters 7/4/2022- New Helena and Eels and the Eggman Collab Letter

[Stupidface]

More nonsense, more fags giving Chris undeserved respect when really they just want clout. Retard thinks begging weens to do something won't make them do the exact opposite? Well, Chris should be out soon at least, which is hopefully more interesting..

 

[Norman B. Normal]

Eels seems almost tortured by having to keep the rest of the letter secret. I wonder what Chris said that was coherent enough to prompt this reaction.

 

[Dagᴏth Ur]

On one hand it seems that this is the closest Chris will ever be to being disconnected from the internet, on the other he has used all the time for reflection available to him to keep being a schizo. He says in the first page that he is enjoying the time for meditation which would be a good thing if it wasn't for the fact hes using it to affirm his Sonichu pantheon. Its unfortunate that the only time he could ever have to fix himself is being squandered, and even then him wasting it doesn't make up for it by being terribly interesting anyways.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Lol, Chris claiming he knew Bella was a troll, yet still tried yo impress her. Chris is a terrible liar.n

 

[mr.moon1488]

View attachment 3485295 View attachment 3485298 View attachment 3485302
Which one would you choose?

Not a real option. One hung himself about 2,000 years ago, and the others are in line for trooning out.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

What’s on earth is Chris writing that these people want to redact so much of it?

“After the merge, Jesus’s came to me and told me how to make yellow cake uranium, its easy, all you need is ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ and add some Fanta, followed by ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ and it’s done!

Tell Null that I have package for him. ️ ”

 

[PsychoNerd054]

What’s an earth is Chris writing that these people want to redact so much of it?

“After the merge, Jesus’s came to me and told me how to make yellow cake uranium, its easy, all you need is ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ and add some Fanta, followed by ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ and it’s done!

Tell Null that I have package for him. ️ ”

Apparently stuff from his Goddess logs and claims that Barb did something "VERY BAD", if Eel's summary is to be believed.

 

[Hoodie]

Whose to say weens won't lie and say Eels leaked the whole letter? Just show the letter

 

[PsychoNerd054]

Whose to say weens won't lie and say Eels leaked the whole letter? Just show the letter

My problem with summaries is that doing so can potentially lead to some sort of autistic game of telephone. Chris is barely comprehesive as is, so for some guy to try and interpret what he's saying in these letters will probably make things even more confusing.

 

[Philosophy Phil]

>inb4 someone writes "Eels leaked the whole letter online, Helena was another judas."

 

[Hogar Grupal]

looks like helena did a summery of the redacted pages

https://twitter.com/HelenaGFiorenza/status/1546888127276584960

So going by this, if Chris had gone to the convention, something Bad might happen to Barb. I'm beginning to think Chris subconsciously fucked her so that he would intentionally get in trouble and be thrown in the slammer. I wonder who paying for Chris now? From what's been talked about here, one of Chris' endings involves being taken in by someone who's rich and he becomes their pet tard.

 

[Ophelia]

“What will you miss about jail?”
Most people: fucking NOTHING.
Chris: sitting on an prayer rug on the floor playing solitaire for hours hmm yeah.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

So going by this, if Chris had gone to the convention, something Bad might happen to Barb. I'm beginning to think Chris subconsciously fucked her so that he would intentionally get in trouble and be thrown in the slammer. I wonder who paying for Chris now? From what's been talked about here, one of Chris' endings involves being taken in by someone who's rich and he becomes their pet tard.

Well, someone rich would be the ideal for him.
Less ideal would be some random gross idiot desperate for e-fame who just so happens to have an apartment or w/e.
Least ideal would be Kengle.

As for him screwing Barb-chan. I doubt he thought he would get in any trouble for it honestly, and had Chris not been Chris and told people about it chances are he never would've. He was just too excited about having finally gotten that china without having had to pay for it that he couldn't contain himself. In more ways than one

 

[Sissyagamben]

I feel like this letter is written very differently than the last one? The last one was just typed out in 13yo retard bulletins and this one is a tiny bit more respectful towards Chris. My assumption is Chris talks about being diddled by barb and such in the letter and this retard buys into it.

So either A. Chris WAS diddled and groomed by barb, which iirc is theorized by many in the forum when the whole thing exploded, citing their inappropriate behaviours etc

Or B. Chris IS still a delusional troon and his porn+delusion filled brain just conjured up this scenario, he did bring up the whatever alternate timeline that barb comes on to him

 

[Guinan's hats]

My problem with summaries is that doing so can potentially lead to some sort of autistic game of telephone. Chris is barely comprehesive as is, so for some guy to try and interpret what he's saying in these letters will probably make things even more confusing.

And Eels isn't even terribly Chris-literate. Motherfucker doesn't even know who fucking Rei Ryghts is and he's trying to be the Chris Chan interpreter.

 

[GypsyBard]

Wonder how his delusions will play out when he's out of the slammer?

 

[Huge Fuckin Nerd]

man, he really is going to end up right on the Killstream when he gets out of prison huh? Ralph’s gonna have a field day getting Chris to sperg out over Null.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

So either A. Chris WAS diddled and groomed by barb, which iirc is theorized by many in the forum when the whole thing exploded, citing their inappropriate behaviours etc

Ah yes, the classic ;”your honor, she raped me first” defence, let’s see how it plays out….

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

It's funny pointing something out in regards to "Bella", if Fiona never decided to leak the incest call, then Chris wouldn't have had any reason to actually hate her up until that point, Chris wasn't actually attracted to Fiona that much, it was more so Janke (Chris was unaware of her plans for him at everfree anyway, and who knows if she would have been able to find something to "blackmail" him with) and that he should actually be more angry at Fiona for exposing both of them in the first place, but obviously that was not what went down and I think the fact that he hasn't pointed towards that specific call too much in his letters, leads me to believe he doesn't want to bring any attention to it, because he knows that where he admits that him and barb were "romping in the hay", it would expose his culpability in exploiting Barb for his horniness.

 

[Slippin Kimmy]

Imagine getting letters from a motherfucker and posting things as redacted because he told you to. These letters are so anemic. I miss Kengle letters.