- Joined
- Feb 21, 2018
DeviantArt Horrors
- Thread starter hm yeah
- Start date
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
TheMultiBrony22 (archive) is a 24 year old (archive) weeaboo brony GachaLife player with a Hazbin Hotel obsession who loves cosplaying Nazis and whatnot. None of the images are NSFW, just spoilering due to the amount of them.
Edward Richtofen cosplay he wore for Halloween (archive).
Soundwave Salute.
Angel Dust Cosplay by me.
Doctor Twilight Sparkle Wants kidneys!
Lucifer cosplay from Twitter.
Apparently he was friends with a 'kid-grooming art thief' (archive) back in 2019. It doesn't seem like he himself partook or supported that activity though.
Links of interest:
YouTube (had another one but it got suspended)
Twitter (NSFW)
DA favorites (NSFW)
Edward Richtofen cosplay he wore for Halloween (archive).
Soundwave Salute.
Angel Dust Cosplay by me.
Doctor Twilight Sparkle Wants kidneys!
Lucifer cosplay from Twitter.
Links of interest:
YouTube (had another one but it got suspended)
Twitter (NSFW)
DA favorites (NSFW)
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
Igorkun (archive) is a Russian North Koreaboo with a transformation fetish who likes philosophy and lolicon.
CutePunishment for American tourist in North Korea
He wrote a brief story named The psychotherapy (archive). While he incorporates his transformation fetish into it, it's mostly philosophical and horror.
CutePunishment for American tourist in North Korea
He wrote a brief story named The psychotherapy (archive). While he incorporates his transformation fetish into it, it's mostly philosophical and horror.
Warning: this is the dark TG/TF horror story!
Philip was a young but successful licensed psychotherapist from Canada who did his private psychotherapy practice. Philip liked his work and he truly loved helping people solve their psychological problems. He knew how to win over his clients, giving the impression of a positive person who is open to the world and communication with other people. Philip sought to apply an ethical approach to his clients, valuing ethical relationships between people. In his opinion, psychotherapy is something more than just work - it is a way of life, love, compassion, the ability to understand and empathize. Philip believed that most patients seek psychotherapeutic help precisely because of communication problems and therefore his goal and method was to help each patient understand what kind of relationships he or she has with the world and other people and then try to find a way to correct these relationships in a positive way. This method of work led his ideological views in a direction similar to the philosophical ideas of subjective idealism, according to which reality is exclusively what we ourselves think about it; therefore, in order for our subjective reality to become positive for us, we must try to perceive the surrounding objective reality exclusively positively...
In the wave of his success in the field of psychotherapy Philip sought more and more difficult cases and more difficult patients, because they, as he thought, could give him good scientific material and valuable psychotherapeutic experience for the further development of his own psychotherapeutic methods. However, it is not for nothing that there is a warning that urges us to be careful with our own desires, because sometimes they can be fulfilled and ... turn into a nightmare… One day, on the recommendation of a doctor he knew, one particularly difficult patient named Victoria was referred to Philip. According to this doctor, Victoria worked in his clinic as a medical laboratory technician, and she gave other people the impression of being a very strange boring person because of her closed and aloof behavior. And this doctor, like many of her other colleagues at the clinic, being worried about her mental state, sincerely kindly recommended her that she try to go to a psychotherapist and undergo a course of psychotherapeutic treatment... Victoria's case boiled down to the fact that she believed that her inner personality was in constant oppositional rejection in relation to the world and society around her. It was only when she was alone that she felt good, comfortable and free, while being in the company of other people was always very unpleasant for her. According to her, Victoria has always looked critically at the so-called "human values" imposed by society, such as, for example: family, romantic love, sociability and trust, evaluating it all very negatively. Already from childhood, she independently came to the idea that «hell is others», since she never experienced any pleasure from communicating with other people; really, what does it give? - idle chatter, petty fuss, senseless vanity - all this always irritated her. She is sincerely convinced that the truly happy person is the one who can almost completely do without fellow tribesmen, and that whenever she tried to connect with other people, she felt that she was losing a part of herself. She did not meet people who could offer her something really smart and interesting, and this is not at all because she was not looking for them. Every time she tried to make an acquaintance, people disappointed her, because they turned out to be either unfortunate sufferers, or fools, or people with a bad disposition and low inclinations. She knows that her worldview contradicts social attitudes that positively assess sociability and open relationships between people however, analyzing the facts of the surrounding universe and putting them into a single logical scheme, she comes to the conclusion that her negative attitude towards other people and society is quite logical and rationally justified, as if she is guided by the accurately calculated correct clock, while the majority of other people in the society around her, by their common consent, tend to navigate by the incorrectly calculated clock and they accepted this incorrect clock as a social norm. She draws such conclusions from observations of standard human behavior. Thus, there are rational reasons for her negative attitude towards other people and she treats people negatively because of their irrational behavior. Unfortunately for her, most people are not rational enough - they think in the categories of unintelligent stereotypes, and they make judgments based on their mental limitations. According to Victoria, most people are vulgar and mentally limited beings who see the meaning of their existence not in the search for rational truths, but in conforming to social stereotypes, no matter how harmful, far-fetched, meaningless and stupid these stereotypes may turn out to be in practice; and the most terrible thing here is that the masses of these mentally limited people set the standards of life in society, under which are forced to adapt a some individuals-exceptions whose individual and personal level of development is higher of the average majority of people who make up society.. Victoria was sure that in fact most of the so-called "decent people" tend to hide their true dark and vicious nature under the visible mask of some external decency (in fact, this is what the process of upbringing boils down to), but in the depths of their low souls their true natures are hidden with their animal passions and vicious inclinations, who really like vicious and vulgar things. And if among the mediocre bulk of other people there is an individual who spiritually rises above the crowd and personally surpasses the average level in society by the fact that he or she sincerely (and not hypocritically) loves everything pure, sublime, intelligent and serious and also sincerely has a negative attitude towards vice and vulgarity and sincerely wants to be clean from the dirt of the surrounding world, then such an individual turns out to be an outcast in society, because in a state where blindness turns out to be a social norm, vision is declared a disease, and the sighted individual turns out to be a deviation from the social norm, which at best will be frankly ignored, and at worst - aggressively bullied.
Since Philip believed that one of the properties of human nature is the desire for communication, he made the erroneous conclusion that Victoria simply suppressed the desire for communication in herself and, therefore, it is necessary to find a way to reveal Victoria's subconscious desire for communication. To achieve this goal, Philip tried to establish close personal contact with Victoria, but this task was more difficult than he thought. So, seeing Victoria's stiffness, Philip invited her to relax and emotionally liberate herself, not hesitating to express her feelings if she feels awkward. Victoria calmly replied to this proposal that she does not feel any awkwardness and that she behaves exclusively within a rational framework and therefore she does not see any rational need to use irrational non-verbal communication methods, for example, such as expressing emotions. Philip thought that he would be able to dispose Victoria for intimate communication with the help of jokes and humor, but he found that Victoria had no sense of humor at all and that his attempts to joke had a completely opposite effect on her, as if from jokes she turned stone and only became more closed and constrained. In General, all Philip's attempts to find a psychological approach to Victoria ended equally unsuccessfully, because on his arguments about the possible ways of her psychotherapeutic treatment, she calmly, logically and almost without emotion, she brought logically reasoned arguments explaining why the next method of psychotherapeutic treatment proposed by Philip personally does not suit her.
- No, she does not want to be simpler and more open, so that other people would reach for her with their dirty sweaty hands… it is better for her if she will more complicated and those who are simpler will leave her alone,
- No, she does not want to seek love and romantic relationships for herself and she never aspired to this, because she is sincerely convinced that romantic love is the greatest stupidity and madness that only people are capable of, because love is the worst kind of captivity-voluntary captivity and therefore, love is the pinnacle of unfreedom, because a lover is ready to voluntarily give up freedom for the sake of an object of love. And yes - she is a virgin and she is proud of it and she intends to keep her virginity all her life, because she is not going to descend to such filth as sex; so, she considers sex, love, romance not just a big stupidity, but also frank dirt and madness. And the stereotype popular in society that love-romantic and sexual relationships are natural and created by nature for the aspiration to happiness is an insane lie, because blind and mindless nature has created, first of all, suffering and dissatisfaction to push living beings to seek relief in the form of a short-term illusion of satisfaction, like drug addicts who receive short-term relief from their condition only when they take another dose of the drug. And since life in a blind and brainless nature is arranged in such a way as to provoke anxieties, which increases many times during sexual activity, Victoria is not ready to sacrifice her freedom and peace in order to conform to the irrational social stereotypes imposed by society about love and romance.
When Philip suggested that Victoria despises people in order to indulge her vanity with the consciousness of her own superiority, Victoria calmly and logically replied that she would be happy if most people by their behavior deserved not contempt, but respect and sympathy, since no proud self-satisfaction cannot be compared with the monstrous discomfort - from purely psychological to direct physical dangers - experienced by an individual living in a world populated mainly by people with a low moral and cultural level.
Philip liked beautiful women and Victoria was beautiful, but her beauty made a frightening and repulsive impression on him, because there was something inhuman in her beauty, as if she were a creature of a completely different nature, alien to this world. Victoria's beauty frightened Philip with some subtle, but clearly felt unnaturalness. Philip thought that this beauty could not belong to a living being, as if it were the cold and dead beauty of an inanimate being, such as a doll, a mannequin, or a stone statue, but not the warm beauty of a living human woman. It seemed to Philip that the beauty of Victoria emanates a killing all living thing ice cold, as if she were a fabulous snow queen who came to him directly from the pages of a nightmare fairy tale. In Victoria's demeanor, Philip subconsciously felt something alien to the whole structure of life in this world. Her constrained movements seemed unnatural to Philip, as if Victoria was not a living human woman, but either a living dead person, or a clockwork mechanical doll. In her monotonous quiet voice, as if coming from the grave, there were almost no emotional notes. Her face looked like an impenetrable mask, on which no living human emotions were displayed: neither joy, nor sadness, nor anger, nor compassion…. as if she were a creature from another world, from a sinister parallel reality unknown to Philip, where there is no place for anything living and warm and where are only the icy cold that kills all life, endless silence and eternal deadening peace... Philip also noticed that in his psychotherapy sessions, Victoria usually looked to the side and tried not to look directly at him, but when their gazes accidentally crossed, Philip saw a frightening emptiness in her gaze, as if her gaze reflected the infinite emptiness of the universe.
Although Victoria did not show any obvious signs of aggressive provocations with her demeanor, behaving exceptionally correctly, calmly and rationally, it seemed to Philip, from the point of view of his feelings, and his emotional perception, that Victoria was deliberately provoking him with such her constrained, clamped and detached behavior, as if she is deliberately trying to piss him off, hiding her true feelings under a multi-valued psychological mask of emotional impenetrability.
For Philip, every psychotherapy session with Victoria turned into excruciating psychological torture. In fact, Philip had only six psychotherapeutic sessions with Victoria(one session once a week), but for some reason he lost count of sessions with her. It seemed to him that she had been going to him for psychotherapy sessions for many months already. During and after the sessions with Victoria, Philip felt himself very irritated; he could hardly restrain his desire to break out into a scream, to make Victoria lose her temper and see at Victoria's reaction in order to understand: does it cold, insensitive, narcissistic mechanical creature, in a feminine guise have at least some kind of living human emotions… Philip caught himself thinking that the sessions with Victoria were driving him crazy, but his professional pride did not allow him to back down, prompting him to try to find an approach to such a difficult and unyielding patient.
At the same time, Victoria behaved like a diligent patient, she regularly and on time went to psychotherapeutic sessions, paid bills, remembered dreams and followed Philip's other instructions. Just in her individual case, Philip's methods did not work with her and did not bring any results.
In the end, at their last, sixth session, irritated by Victoria's stubbornness, Philip flared up and directly told to Victoria what he felt towards her: that, in his opinion, Victoria's views are written on her forehead, that she is an arrogant autistic person who despises people and, as a result, does not know how to communicate with them. But all of Victoria's psychological problems are solved very simply: we just need to try to look positively at the world around us in general and other people in particular, and then everything will be fine, because our personal reality is in our head and therefore we ourselves program our personal reality.
To this Victoria replied calmly and without expressing emotions that she comes to the conclusion that all his psychotherapeutic techniques are lies that are intended for the purpose of leading people's minds away from the bitter and unsightly truths of the cruel reality of this world, while in practice, all these psychotherapeutic optimistic advice turn out to be nothing more than a sweet lie that appeals to emotions, but not to mind, and this sweet lie contradicts the bitter truth of the objective laws of the universe. In fact, according to Victoria, people are just protein biological bodies, and the only difference between them and other animals is that, thanks to a more developed brain, people have the ability to higher nervous activity with complex psychological functions, thanks to which people have self-awareness. However, most people are not inclined to use their self-awareness for its intended purpose; they are very limited and superficial, which is why they float through life, being not inclined to think about its essence: about the cause-and-effect connecting links that are at the basis of the processes of the universe, but they willingly follow the lies of madmen and fraudsters who seduce them with emotionally attractive ideas. A successful method of psychotherapeutic mind formatting usually consists in the fact that a skilled psychotherapist knows the formulas of sweet lies, which successfully synchronizes with as popular as irrational social stereotypes, that are perceived emotionally positively and, therefore, capable of sweetly lulling the human consciousness. At the same time, on any person who turns out to be rational enough to disagree with the so-called «professional practicing psychologists» on the basis of logic and facts, they are ready to hang a psychiatric diagnosis, by declaring such a person mentally ill; and instead of opening our eyes to the bitter and unsightly true state of affairs and things in this worst possible world, applied psychotherapy aims to lull the individual's mind with stupid and false optimistic fairy tales and cloud the individual's consciousness with the sweet lies of blissful ignorance in order to lead it away from the terrible, bitter, cruel and unsightly truths of the real essence of the structure of the universe and of the real nature of the world. And Philip, like most people who think like him, is not only trapped in self-deception, but also misleads other people with his psychotherapeutic tales. However, the time has come to destroy the cozy world of psychotherapeutic illusions of Philip, to open his eyes and show him real life, placing him in new circumstances of objective reality; and only if his psychotherapeutic theories can receive experimental confirmation by practice (in other words, if Philip can sincerely love and perceive positively his new reality), he will be able to return to his old life.
Then Philip saw a strange, unlike any other, radiance… and then he woke up, to his horror, in a completely unfamiliar small room in a completely unfamiliar female body…then new memories, uploaded in Philip's mind, began to appear in his consciousness… these were memories of the life of the woman in whose body he found himself. He still identified himself as Philip, the straight male psychotherapist from Canada, but it was as if a detailed film of her life that he had seen was recorded in his mind. Thus, Philip had information that he was in the body of a cheap street prostitute named Natasha, who lived in one poor and troubled country in Eastern Europe. Being in Natasha's body, Philip understood that it was pointless to tell anyone about his former, male, life - no one would believe him (her) for sure, but only consider him (her) crazy and send him (her) to a madhouse… so he saw no other choice for himself but to live Natasha's life in her body, try to play her role and... try to enjoy life in the body of voluptuous young woman with big breasts and huge ass… however, in practice, it turned out to be not so easy, because the female body of Natasha prepared a lot of unpleasant and unexpected surprises for Philip. After all, only being stuck in the female body of Natasha, Philip fully experienced on his own skin what it's like to be a woman and realized how men are happy and do not even notice this, but they should to thank the male Y-chromosome every day for what they have it, because men's bodies are free from a number of specific biological problems that women's bodies have! What are these problems?
So, the first problem that Philip faced in Natasha's female body - is her big-sized Breasts, after all, Philip now had to carry on himself (herself) two heavy fat bags, which did not hold on to anything except the skin that covered them, and dangled with great amplitude at any sharp movement; and it was so painful and unpleasant that Philip had to wear special bras and/or tops that tightly hugged his (her) Breasts… however, these items of clothing fitted so tightly to Philip's chest that they were a new source of discomfort to the upper part of his (her) new body…
Another unexpected female problem that Philip encountered was urination: Just imagine that instead of urinating, you have diarrhea every time when you use the toilet. Moreover, a woman, on average, also has to go there more often than a man.
The third and even more unpleasant typical female problem for Philip was menstruation. When Philip was a man, he did not have periods and, like most men, he took it for granted, without thinking about how happy it was. Just imagine that every month you have an attack of, say, bloody diarrhea for about three days, - so strong that you have to walk with a gag in your ass, - and this gag is the least of the problems, because abdominal pain, nausea and other delights are attached… and this fact of monthly bloody diarrhea clearly negatively affects the psyche.
Another one inconvenience for Philip was Natasha's clothing: her tight miniskirts and mini dresses, in which it was impossible to take normal steps and high-heeled shoes of Natasha that killed his (her) feet; all these typical items of women's wardrobe caused significant discomfort to Philip and he (she) could not get used to walking in these miniskirts, mini dresses and high-heeled shoes.
His (her) physical suffering was aggravated by moral suffering: he (she) felt incredibly embarrassed in ridiculous female appearance, dressing and looking like a woman. Philip understood with his mind that he was in the body of a natural, 100% woman, but still, being in this female body and dressing in these women's clothes, he felt very ridiculous, because it was all so wrong for him that he felt himself very ashamed, as if he were a transvestite dressing up in all overtly feminine (although, in truth, probably not every real girl would dare to wear those revealing slutty outfits in which Natasha dressed)… Of course, Philip did not want to voluntarily dress in Natasha's depraved clothes, just like he didn't want to do the makeup but the impulses of Natasha's body forced Philip to do this automatically, against his will and he (she) could not fight against these impulses of his (her) new body… An additional inconvenience for Philip was Natasha's long hair and nails: her long hair crawled into the face and long painted nails prevented the use of hands fully!
Whenever Philip tried to speak, he (she) automatically spoke in Natasha's language and at the same time he (she) could understand this language, which was completely unfamiliar to him (her) until then, as if it were his native language for him; at the same time, with difficulty and effort, he (she) could force himself (herself) to speak his former native language - English, as if this language had become for him (her) a foreign language that must be studied separately. Philip didn't like the sound of Natasha's native language; this language seemed to him harsh and inarticulate, sounding as if the speakers of this language spoke with porridge in their mouths. However, the main cultural shock Philip experienced from the peculiarities of the mentality of local residents of his (her) new «native» country. The locals, with their demeanor, their barbaric manners, and their predilections for various vices, reminded him more of primitive savages or medieval barbarians, but in no way the inhabitants of the modern civilized world. Philip was unpleasantly surprised by poverty, dirt, crime, domestic violence, as well as the addictions of local residents to various bad habits (for example, such as smoking and alcoholism). All these dirty and bad aspects of life were so widespread in society here, as if it were a socially approved norm here. These realities of local life made an unpleasant and depressing impression on Philip, contrasting in a disadvantageous way with the cozy and «plush» realities of his native prosperous Canada.
Also an unpleasant surprise for Philip was the high level of sexism, which was a social norm in the society of this country. Despite the formal equality of the sexes, traditionalist sexist prejudices prevailed in the society of this country, which required, as a social norm, to correspond to traditional socio-gender roles. Therefore nobody wanted to consider Philip in the female body of Natasha as a person, preferring to see Philip/Natasha as a corrupt low-rated woman, destined to satisfy male sexual lusts.
Many of Natasha's clients were rude and cruel men; some of them turned out to be criminals or something like that. These men often smelled of alcohol and tobacco. Philip himself in his former life was a convinced supporter of a healthy lifestyle, therefore he did not drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes; moreover: he could not even stand their smell! However, to his horror and disgust, Natasha's body forced Philip to drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes against his will; and in this situation, Philip could not resist the impulses of his (her) new body, just as he could not resist the sexual impulses of this body in contacts with men. During these contacts with men, Natasha's body prevailed over the will of Philip, prompting him (her) to have sexual relations with these men and satisfy their most perverted lusts. In these situations, Philip felt and realized everything that was happening, but he could not fight against the impulses of Natasha's body… and he hated it.
All these life circumstances in which Philip was stuck were so wrong to his nature and so antagonistic to his psyche that he could not deceive himself anymore. Philip's senses could deceive him, but he himself could no longer deceive his senses, which constantly signaled to him that he was stuck in complete shit. At night, Philip often had nightmares, in which he saw the image of Victoria, reminding him that if he wants to return to his old male life, and to change back into man, he must learn to perceive his new reality in a sincerely positive way. But Philip himself could not set himself up to love his new reality, to enjoy his new life, and perceive it all sincerely positively. In fact, he (she) sincerely hated every minute of his (her) life lived in Natasha's body.
Philip thought that he (she) would be able to perceive life in Natasha's body positively if he (she) could change Natasha's life for the better, for example, change his (her) profession and leave the path of prostitution. However, as if some unknown external force kept Philip, depriving him (her) of any opportunity to realize his (her) intentions to leave the profession of a prostitute and change Natasha's life for the better.
Philip was desperate from the realization that he (she) was stuck in this body, in this life and in this reality, because his (her) new objective reality sent him (her) only one negative, not giving not the slightest reason for being positive. As a result of this unpleasant experience, Philip began to ask the question for himself: was he really mistaken in his psychotherapeutic illusions and all his previous life and activities as a psychotherapist were a lie, while in fact the true and real essence of life is suffering? Is it possible that all his previous professional psychotherapeutic activity was one continuous self-deception and he himself, having embarked on the path of psychotherapy, chose the wrong method and stubbornly adhered to it, deceiving himself and other people, while in fact all his optimistic psychotherapeutic mantras with ethical appeals not to withdraw into oneself and to be open to other people and relationships with them were nothing more than a beautiful-sounding fake dummy, the ability to deceive himself and others, presenting shit as candy? And now, when there is so much shit in his life that he can no longer deceive himself, Philip is forced to accept the truth that life is like a huge pie with shit, from which an individual bites off a piece every day until death frees this individual from the shackles of life… And this terrible and filthy world does not at all deserve to be looked at with optimism…
And there was another enigmatic question that haunted Philip: who really was Victoria - this mysterious woman who changed so dramatically his life and his fate for the worse? Was she a human woman with unusual psychic / supernatural abilities, or was she a dark goddess / demon? Was she an alien from outer space or from another world? What if she was a figment of his imagination or some materialized hallucination - a sublimation of psychic energy? Philip could not get an answer to this question and all that remained for him (her) was to continue living Natasha's life - a miserable life that he (she) hated, consoling himself (herself) with the dubious hope that someday he (she) would after all be able to find a way to love his (her) new life and perceive his (her) new reality sincerely positively…
Author's P. S.
English is not my native language. So when I wrote the text for this story, I probably made many linguistic mistakes. If you will point me to them and help me to correct or edit them I will be very grateful ^_^
Philip was a young but successful licensed psychotherapist from Canada who did his private psychotherapy practice. Philip liked his work and he truly loved helping people solve their psychological problems. He knew how to win over his clients, giving the impression of a positive person who is open to the world and communication with other people. Philip sought to apply an ethical approach to his clients, valuing ethical relationships between people. In his opinion, psychotherapy is something more than just work - it is a way of life, love, compassion, the ability to understand and empathize. Philip believed that most patients seek psychotherapeutic help precisely because of communication problems and therefore his goal and method was to help each patient understand what kind of relationships he or she has with the world and other people and then try to find a way to correct these relationships in a positive way. This method of work led his ideological views in a direction similar to the philosophical ideas of subjective idealism, according to which reality is exclusively what we ourselves think about it; therefore, in order for our subjective reality to become positive for us, we must try to perceive the surrounding objective reality exclusively positively...
In the wave of his success in the field of psychotherapy Philip sought more and more difficult cases and more difficult patients, because they, as he thought, could give him good scientific material and valuable psychotherapeutic experience for the further development of his own psychotherapeutic methods. However, it is not for nothing that there is a warning that urges us to be careful with our own desires, because sometimes they can be fulfilled and ... turn into a nightmare… One day, on the recommendation of a doctor he knew, one particularly difficult patient named Victoria was referred to Philip. According to this doctor, Victoria worked in his clinic as a medical laboratory technician, and she gave other people the impression of being a very strange boring person because of her closed and aloof behavior. And this doctor, like many of her other colleagues at the clinic, being worried about her mental state, sincerely kindly recommended her that she try to go to a psychotherapist and undergo a course of psychotherapeutic treatment... Victoria's case boiled down to the fact that she believed that her inner personality was in constant oppositional rejection in relation to the world and society around her. It was only when she was alone that she felt good, comfortable and free, while being in the company of other people was always very unpleasant for her. According to her, Victoria has always looked critically at the so-called "human values" imposed by society, such as, for example: family, romantic love, sociability and trust, evaluating it all very negatively. Already from childhood, she independently came to the idea that «hell is others», since she never experienced any pleasure from communicating with other people; really, what does it give? - idle chatter, petty fuss, senseless vanity - all this always irritated her. She is sincerely convinced that the truly happy person is the one who can almost completely do without fellow tribesmen, and that whenever she tried to connect with other people, she felt that she was losing a part of herself. She did not meet people who could offer her something really smart and interesting, and this is not at all because she was not looking for them. Every time she tried to make an acquaintance, people disappointed her, because they turned out to be either unfortunate sufferers, or fools, or people with a bad disposition and low inclinations. She knows that her worldview contradicts social attitudes that positively assess sociability and open relationships between people however, analyzing the facts of the surrounding universe and putting them into a single logical scheme, she comes to the conclusion that her negative attitude towards other people and society is quite logical and rationally justified, as if she is guided by the accurately calculated correct clock, while the majority of other people in the society around her, by their common consent, tend to navigate by the incorrectly calculated clock and they accepted this incorrect clock as a social norm. She draws such conclusions from observations of standard human behavior. Thus, there are rational reasons for her negative attitude towards other people and she treats people negatively because of their irrational behavior. Unfortunately for her, most people are not rational enough - they think in the categories of unintelligent stereotypes, and they make judgments based on their mental limitations. According to Victoria, most people are vulgar and mentally limited beings who see the meaning of their existence not in the search for rational truths, but in conforming to social stereotypes, no matter how harmful, far-fetched, meaningless and stupid these stereotypes may turn out to be in practice; and the most terrible thing here is that the masses of these mentally limited people set the standards of life in society, under which are forced to adapt a some individuals-exceptions whose individual and personal level of development is higher of the average majority of people who make up society.. Victoria was sure that in fact most of the so-called "decent people" tend to hide their true dark and vicious nature under the visible mask of some external decency (in fact, this is what the process of upbringing boils down to), but in the depths of their low souls their true natures are hidden with their animal passions and vicious inclinations, who really like vicious and vulgar things. And if among the mediocre bulk of other people there is an individual who spiritually rises above the crowd and personally surpasses the average level in society by the fact that he or she sincerely (and not hypocritically) loves everything pure, sublime, intelligent and serious and also sincerely has a negative attitude towards vice and vulgarity and sincerely wants to be clean from the dirt of the surrounding world, then such an individual turns out to be an outcast in society, because in a state where blindness turns out to be a social norm, vision is declared a disease, and the sighted individual turns out to be a deviation from the social norm, which at best will be frankly ignored, and at worst - aggressively bullied.
Since Philip believed that one of the properties of human nature is the desire for communication, he made the erroneous conclusion that Victoria simply suppressed the desire for communication in herself and, therefore, it is necessary to find a way to reveal Victoria's subconscious desire for communication. To achieve this goal, Philip tried to establish close personal contact with Victoria, but this task was more difficult than he thought. So, seeing Victoria's stiffness, Philip invited her to relax and emotionally liberate herself, not hesitating to express her feelings if she feels awkward. Victoria calmly replied to this proposal that she does not feel any awkwardness and that she behaves exclusively within a rational framework and therefore she does not see any rational need to use irrational non-verbal communication methods, for example, such as expressing emotions. Philip thought that he would be able to dispose Victoria for intimate communication with the help of jokes and humor, but he found that Victoria had no sense of humor at all and that his attempts to joke had a completely opposite effect on her, as if from jokes she turned stone and only became more closed and constrained. In General, all Philip's attempts to find a psychological approach to Victoria ended equally unsuccessfully, because on his arguments about the possible ways of her psychotherapeutic treatment, she calmly, logically and almost without emotion, she brought logically reasoned arguments explaining why the next method of psychotherapeutic treatment proposed by Philip personally does not suit her.
- No, she does not want to be simpler and more open, so that other people would reach for her with their dirty sweaty hands… it is better for her if she will more complicated and those who are simpler will leave her alone,
- No, she does not want to seek love and romantic relationships for herself and she never aspired to this, because she is sincerely convinced that romantic love is the greatest stupidity and madness that only people are capable of, because love is the worst kind of captivity-voluntary captivity and therefore, love is the pinnacle of unfreedom, because a lover is ready to voluntarily give up freedom for the sake of an object of love. And yes - she is a virgin and she is proud of it and she intends to keep her virginity all her life, because she is not going to descend to such filth as sex; so, she considers sex, love, romance not just a big stupidity, but also frank dirt and madness. And the stereotype popular in society that love-romantic and sexual relationships are natural and created by nature for the aspiration to happiness is an insane lie, because blind and mindless nature has created, first of all, suffering and dissatisfaction to push living beings to seek relief in the form of a short-term illusion of satisfaction, like drug addicts who receive short-term relief from their condition only when they take another dose of the drug. And since life in a blind and brainless nature is arranged in such a way as to provoke anxieties, which increases many times during sexual activity, Victoria is not ready to sacrifice her freedom and peace in order to conform to the irrational social stereotypes imposed by society about love and romance.
When Philip suggested that Victoria despises people in order to indulge her vanity with the consciousness of her own superiority, Victoria calmly and logically replied that she would be happy if most people by their behavior deserved not contempt, but respect and sympathy, since no proud self-satisfaction cannot be compared with the monstrous discomfort - from purely psychological to direct physical dangers - experienced by an individual living in a world populated mainly by people with a low moral and cultural level.
Philip liked beautiful women and Victoria was beautiful, but her beauty made a frightening and repulsive impression on him, because there was something inhuman in her beauty, as if she were a creature of a completely different nature, alien to this world. Victoria's beauty frightened Philip with some subtle, but clearly felt unnaturalness. Philip thought that this beauty could not belong to a living being, as if it were the cold and dead beauty of an inanimate being, such as a doll, a mannequin, or a stone statue, but not the warm beauty of a living human woman. It seemed to Philip that the beauty of Victoria emanates a killing all living thing ice cold, as if she were a fabulous snow queen who came to him directly from the pages of a nightmare fairy tale. In Victoria's demeanor, Philip subconsciously felt something alien to the whole structure of life in this world. Her constrained movements seemed unnatural to Philip, as if Victoria was not a living human woman, but either a living dead person, or a clockwork mechanical doll. In her monotonous quiet voice, as if coming from the grave, there were almost no emotional notes. Her face looked like an impenetrable mask, on which no living human emotions were displayed: neither joy, nor sadness, nor anger, nor compassion…. as if she were a creature from another world, from a sinister parallel reality unknown to Philip, where there is no place for anything living and warm and where are only the icy cold that kills all life, endless silence and eternal deadening peace... Philip also noticed that in his psychotherapy sessions, Victoria usually looked to the side and tried not to look directly at him, but when their gazes accidentally crossed, Philip saw a frightening emptiness in her gaze, as if her gaze reflected the infinite emptiness of the universe.
Although Victoria did not show any obvious signs of aggressive provocations with her demeanor, behaving exceptionally correctly, calmly and rationally, it seemed to Philip, from the point of view of his feelings, and his emotional perception, that Victoria was deliberately provoking him with such her constrained, clamped and detached behavior, as if she is deliberately trying to piss him off, hiding her true feelings under a multi-valued psychological mask of emotional impenetrability.
For Philip, every psychotherapy session with Victoria turned into excruciating psychological torture. In fact, Philip had only six psychotherapeutic sessions with Victoria(one session once a week), but for some reason he lost count of sessions with her. It seemed to him that she had been going to him for psychotherapy sessions for many months already. During and after the sessions with Victoria, Philip felt himself very irritated; he could hardly restrain his desire to break out into a scream, to make Victoria lose her temper and see at Victoria's reaction in order to understand: does it cold, insensitive, narcissistic mechanical creature, in a feminine guise have at least some kind of living human emotions… Philip caught himself thinking that the sessions with Victoria were driving him crazy, but his professional pride did not allow him to back down, prompting him to try to find an approach to such a difficult and unyielding patient.
At the same time, Victoria behaved like a diligent patient, she regularly and on time went to psychotherapeutic sessions, paid bills, remembered dreams and followed Philip's other instructions. Just in her individual case, Philip's methods did not work with her and did not bring any results.
In the end, at their last, sixth session, irritated by Victoria's stubbornness, Philip flared up and directly told to Victoria what he felt towards her: that, in his opinion, Victoria's views are written on her forehead, that she is an arrogant autistic person who despises people and, as a result, does not know how to communicate with them. But all of Victoria's psychological problems are solved very simply: we just need to try to look positively at the world around us in general and other people in particular, and then everything will be fine, because our personal reality is in our head and therefore we ourselves program our personal reality.
To this Victoria replied calmly and without expressing emotions that she comes to the conclusion that all his psychotherapeutic techniques are lies that are intended for the purpose of leading people's minds away from the bitter and unsightly truths of the cruel reality of this world, while in practice, all these psychotherapeutic optimistic advice turn out to be nothing more than a sweet lie that appeals to emotions, but not to mind, and this sweet lie contradicts the bitter truth of the objective laws of the universe. In fact, according to Victoria, people are just protein biological bodies, and the only difference between them and other animals is that, thanks to a more developed brain, people have the ability to higher nervous activity with complex psychological functions, thanks to which people have self-awareness. However, most people are not inclined to use their self-awareness for its intended purpose; they are very limited and superficial, which is why they float through life, being not inclined to think about its essence: about the cause-and-effect connecting links that are at the basis of the processes of the universe, but they willingly follow the lies of madmen and fraudsters who seduce them with emotionally attractive ideas. A successful method of psychotherapeutic mind formatting usually consists in the fact that a skilled psychotherapist knows the formulas of sweet lies, which successfully synchronizes with as popular as irrational social stereotypes, that are perceived emotionally positively and, therefore, capable of sweetly lulling the human consciousness. At the same time, on any person who turns out to be rational enough to disagree with the so-called «professional practicing psychologists» on the basis of logic and facts, they are ready to hang a psychiatric diagnosis, by declaring such a person mentally ill; and instead of opening our eyes to the bitter and unsightly true state of affairs and things in this worst possible world, applied psychotherapy aims to lull the individual's mind with stupid and false optimistic fairy tales and cloud the individual's consciousness with the sweet lies of blissful ignorance in order to lead it away from the terrible, bitter, cruel and unsightly truths of the real essence of the structure of the universe and of the real nature of the world. And Philip, like most people who think like him, is not only trapped in self-deception, but also misleads other people with his psychotherapeutic tales. However, the time has come to destroy the cozy world of psychotherapeutic illusions of Philip, to open his eyes and show him real life, placing him in new circumstances of objective reality; and only if his psychotherapeutic theories can receive experimental confirmation by practice (in other words, if Philip can sincerely love and perceive positively his new reality), he will be able to return to his old life.
Then Philip saw a strange, unlike any other, radiance… and then he woke up, to his horror, in a completely unfamiliar small room in a completely unfamiliar female body…then new memories, uploaded in Philip's mind, began to appear in his consciousness… these were memories of the life of the woman in whose body he found himself. He still identified himself as Philip, the straight male psychotherapist from Canada, but it was as if a detailed film of her life that he had seen was recorded in his mind. Thus, Philip had information that he was in the body of a cheap street prostitute named Natasha, who lived in one poor and troubled country in Eastern Europe. Being in Natasha's body, Philip understood that it was pointless to tell anyone about his former, male, life - no one would believe him (her) for sure, but only consider him (her) crazy and send him (her) to a madhouse… so he saw no other choice for himself but to live Natasha's life in her body, try to play her role and... try to enjoy life in the body of voluptuous young woman with big breasts and huge ass… however, in practice, it turned out to be not so easy, because the female body of Natasha prepared a lot of unpleasant and unexpected surprises for Philip. After all, only being stuck in the female body of Natasha, Philip fully experienced on his own skin what it's like to be a woman and realized how men are happy and do not even notice this, but they should to thank the male Y-chromosome every day for what they have it, because men's bodies are free from a number of specific biological problems that women's bodies have! What are these problems?
So, the first problem that Philip faced in Natasha's female body - is her big-sized Breasts, after all, Philip now had to carry on himself (herself) two heavy fat bags, which did not hold on to anything except the skin that covered them, and dangled with great amplitude at any sharp movement; and it was so painful and unpleasant that Philip had to wear special bras and/or tops that tightly hugged his (her) Breasts… however, these items of clothing fitted so tightly to Philip's chest that they were a new source of discomfort to the upper part of his (her) new body…
Another unexpected female problem that Philip encountered was urination: Just imagine that instead of urinating, you have diarrhea every time when you use the toilet. Moreover, a woman, on average, also has to go there more often than a man.
The third and even more unpleasant typical female problem for Philip was menstruation. When Philip was a man, he did not have periods and, like most men, he took it for granted, without thinking about how happy it was. Just imagine that every month you have an attack of, say, bloody diarrhea for about three days, - so strong that you have to walk with a gag in your ass, - and this gag is the least of the problems, because abdominal pain, nausea and other delights are attached… and this fact of monthly bloody diarrhea clearly negatively affects the psyche.
Another one inconvenience for Philip was Natasha's clothing: her tight miniskirts and mini dresses, in which it was impossible to take normal steps and high-heeled shoes of Natasha that killed his (her) feet; all these typical items of women's wardrobe caused significant discomfort to Philip and he (she) could not get used to walking in these miniskirts, mini dresses and high-heeled shoes.
His (her) physical suffering was aggravated by moral suffering: he (she) felt incredibly embarrassed in ridiculous female appearance, dressing and looking like a woman. Philip understood with his mind that he was in the body of a natural, 100% woman, but still, being in this female body and dressing in these women's clothes, he felt very ridiculous, because it was all so wrong for him that he felt himself very ashamed, as if he were a transvestite dressing up in all overtly feminine (although, in truth, probably not every real girl would dare to wear those revealing slutty outfits in which Natasha dressed)… Of course, Philip did not want to voluntarily dress in Natasha's depraved clothes, just like he didn't want to do the makeup but the impulses of Natasha's body forced Philip to do this automatically, against his will and he (she) could not fight against these impulses of his (her) new body… An additional inconvenience for Philip was Natasha's long hair and nails: her long hair crawled into the face and long painted nails prevented the use of hands fully!
Whenever Philip tried to speak, he (she) automatically spoke in Natasha's language and at the same time he (she) could understand this language, which was completely unfamiliar to him (her) until then, as if it were his native language for him; at the same time, with difficulty and effort, he (she) could force himself (herself) to speak his former native language - English, as if this language had become for him (her) a foreign language that must be studied separately. Philip didn't like the sound of Natasha's native language; this language seemed to him harsh and inarticulate, sounding as if the speakers of this language spoke with porridge in their mouths. However, the main cultural shock Philip experienced from the peculiarities of the mentality of local residents of his (her) new «native» country. The locals, with their demeanor, their barbaric manners, and their predilections for various vices, reminded him more of primitive savages or medieval barbarians, but in no way the inhabitants of the modern civilized world. Philip was unpleasantly surprised by poverty, dirt, crime, domestic violence, as well as the addictions of local residents to various bad habits (for example, such as smoking and alcoholism). All these dirty and bad aspects of life were so widespread in society here, as if it were a socially approved norm here. These realities of local life made an unpleasant and depressing impression on Philip, contrasting in a disadvantageous way with the cozy and «plush» realities of his native prosperous Canada.
Also an unpleasant surprise for Philip was the high level of sexism, which was a social norm in the society of this country. Despite the formal equality of the sexes, traditionalist sexist prejudices prevailed in the society of this country, which required, as a social norm, to correspond to traditional socio-gender roles. Therefore nobody wanted to consider Philip in the female body of Natasha as a person, preferring to see Philip/Natasha as a corrupt low-rated woman, destined to satisfy male sexual lusts.
Many of Natasha's clients were rude and cruel men; some of them turned out to be criminals or something like that. These men often smelled of alcohol and tobacco. Philip himself in his former life was a convinced supporter of a healthy lifestyle, therefore he did not drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes; moreover: he could not even stand their smell! However, to his horror and disgust, Natasha's body forced Philip to drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes against his will; and in this situation, Philip could not resist the impulses of his (her) new body, just as he could not resist the sexual impulses of this body in contacts with men. During these contacts with men, Natasha's body prevailed over the will of Philip, prompting him (her) to have sexual relations with these men and satisfy their most perverted lusts. In these situations, Philip felt and realized everything that was happening, but he could not fight against the impulses of Natasha's body… and he hated it.
All these life circumstances in which Philip was stuck were so wrong to his nature and so antagonistic to his psyche that he could not deceive himself anymore. Philip's senses could deceive him, but he himself could no longer deceive his senses, which constantly signaled to him that he was stuck in complete shit. At night, Philip often had nightmares, in which he saw the image of Victoria, reminding him that if he wants to return to his old male life, and to change back into man, he must learn to perceive his new reality in a sincerely positive way. But Philip himself could not set himself up to love his new reality, to enjoy his new life, and perceive it all sincerely positively. In fact, he (she) sincerely hated every minute of his (her) life lived in Natasha's body.
Philip thought that he (she) would be able to perceive life in Natasha's body positively if he (she) could change Natasha's life for the better, for example, change his (her) profession and leave the path of prostitution. However, as if some unknown external force kept Philip, depriving him (her) of any opportunity to realize his (her) intentions to leave the profession of a prostitute and change Natasha's life for the better.
Philip was desperate from the realization that he (she) was stuck in this body, in this life and in this reality, because his (her) new objective reality sent him (her) only one negative, not giving not the slightest reason for being positive. As a result of this unpleasant experience, Philip began to ask the question for himself: was he really mistaken in his psychotherapeutic illusions and all his previous life and activities as a psychotherapist were a lie, while in fact the true and real essence of life is suffering? Is it possible that all his previous professional psychotherapeutic activity was one continuous self-deception and he himself, having embarked on the path of psychotherapy, chose the wrong method and stubbornly adhered to it, deceiving himself and other people, while in fact all his optimistic psychotherapeutic mantras with ethical appeals not to withdraw into oneself and to be open to other people and relationships with them were nothing more than a beautiful-sounding fake dummy, the ability to deceive himself and others, presenting shit as candy? And now, when there is so much shit in his life that he can no longer deceive himself, Philip is forced to accept the truth that life is like a huge pie with shit, from which an individual bites off a piece every day until death frees this individual from the shackles of life… And this terrible and filthy world does not at all deserve to be looked at with optimism…
And there was another enigmatic question that haunted Philip: who really was Victoria - this mysterious woman who changed so dramatically his life and his fate for the worse? Was she a human woman with unusual psychic / supernatural abilities, or was she a dark goddess / demon? Was she an alien from outer space or from another world? What if she was a figment of his imagination or some materialized hallucination - a sublimation of psychic energy? Philip could not get an answer to this question and all that remained for him (her) was to continue living Natasha's life - a miserable life that he (she) hated, consoling himself (herself) with the dubious hope that someday he (she) would after all be able to find a way to love his (her) new life and perceive his (her) new reality sincerely positively…
Author's P. S.
English is not my native language. So when I wrote the text for this story, I probably made many linguistic mistakes. If you will point me to them and help me to correct or edit them I will be very grateful ^_^
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- Joined
- Sep 29, 2018
@Berwick that picture of the girl walking her horrifying eldritch abomination would've been an awesome picture if it was drawn by someone with talent and wasn't fetish art. 
Not surprised he's Russian. Russians are into some weird shit - they can compete with Holland and Japan when it comes to fucked up fetishes.
Not surprised he's Russian. Russians are into some weird shit - they can compete with Holland and Japan when it comes to fucked up fetishes.
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
Apparently it's supposed to be fanart for a game called Saya no uta. According to Wikipedia, it's a "suspense psychological horror lolicon eroge visual novel". Igorkun has it listed as one of his favorite video games.@Berwick that picture of the girl walking her horrifying eldritch abomination would've been an awesome picture if it was drawn by someone with talent and wasn't fetish art.
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2020
Also, that drawing is based on a canon part of the storyline.
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2018
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2016
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
What puts this over the top is that they're dressed Like the Coombait lady from Neir:Automata
Fireskull
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 22, 2022
This is fucking nightmare fuel right there holy shit
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
It has
>Horrifyingly good art (probably commissioned by a mentally ill gorillionare)
>Gay
>Furry
>giant feitsh
>Gay giant furries
>vore fetish
>giant penises
>Giant penis vore
>Childhood ruined
>Unnecessary crossover
>Toonphilia
>Ween shit
The whole nine yards!
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Fireskull
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 22, 2022
And it scores fucking touchdown!!
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- Jan 6, 2022
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2020
Christ, what the fuck is wrong with her arms? Are they detatched or something?
She's also supposed to look cute and not like like an ugly Ellen Degeneres furry lookalike.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
It's like he Photoshopoed the fox onto feet fetish pics, traced it,and then did shading blindfolded.View attachment 3518177
Christ, what the fuck is wrong with her arms? Are they detatched or something?
She's also supposed to look cute and not like like an ugly Ellen Degeneres furry lookalike.
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2020
This one is only just marginally better.
Defying physics or amazing flexibility? God Mr. Wolf must be aching right now.
F+ for antomy. He looks like a mutant.
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- Joined
- Nov 17, 2019
So now we know who did 9/11
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2018
I mean it certainly is a plot twist that the Chinese were behind it.
Hongourable Madisha
You see, some of us don't know English properly.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2019
Why do so many of them have DreamWorks face?
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2018
Becuase many of them are DreamWorks characters.