Lord of the Rings TV Series in Development - How could this POSSIBLY go wrong...

I don't know who Lenny Henry is. 🤷‍♂️However, this is Amazon. They'll hide as much as they can, and burble about meeting expectations ratingswise where they can't. The shill media will dance along, praising the series for tangential stuff like the sexual proclivities of the cast and crew, how inclusive it all is, and on and on.

Essentially a redux of what they did to season one of the Wheel of Time, though this is going to be far harder to ignore than that was. Meaning Wheel of Time is eminently more able to canceled (in a ratings sense, not a woke sense) than this is. Meaning I'll bet it completes its run even if only twelve people and a blind guppy are watching it, whereas I fully expect Wheel of Time to be gone after Season 3. Plus Amazon paid a fuck ton more for LotR than WoT.
He's the black Hobbit / Harfoot / whatever the fuck

Terribly unfunny britbong comedy actor from decades past

Don Warrington would've been better but even he would probably turn this down
 
Was this thread rolled back or something? There are a lot of old posts marked as new.
 
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Even the so-called "Black Númenoreans" are not black, since if they are the descendants of the King's Men faction of Númenoreans they almost certainly regard Haradrim as lesser beings than them and would never interbreed with them. The Númenoreans colonized Harad in the second age, so black people being in the show was always on the table, though not as hobbits, dwarves, or Dúnedain, which is what they have done.
Fun fact: the Black Numenoreans were almost all descendants of The House of Hador, so they should have had blonde hair and blue eyes. And yea, the fact they decided to cast a half-Ghanese actress as Tar-Miriel shows you just how retarded the show runners are to embrace how "woke" they are. Instead of making her an original character as a Haradrim Queen/Princess (who maybe resists the Numenorean colonization of Far Harad), nope they're gonna go with "We wuz Numenoreans n shiet!" instead. Quite possibly the most ironically stupid decision possible given that the Numenoreans of the end of the Second Age WERE colonialist racial supremacists. Though, some have speculated that Ar-Pharazoan the Golden will be full on "Drumpf" and King's Men all about "Make Numenor Great Again!". Never mind that after Tar-Aldarion married the lesser lived Erendis thousands of years beforehand it caused the Royal House to unofficially adopt a rule of "bloodline purity" by intermarrying only within the Royal House (Tolkien DID describe the Numenoreans as being sort of reminiscent of the ancient Egyptians).
 
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Fun fact: the Black Numenoreans were almost all descendants of The House of Hador, so they should have had blonde hair and blue eyes. And yea, the fact they decided to cast a half-Ghanese actress as Tar-Miriel shows you just how retarded the show runners are to embrace how "woke" they are. Instead of making her an original character as a Haradrim Queen/Princess (who maybe resists the Numenorean colonization of Far Harad), nope they're gonna go with "We wuz Numenoreans n shiet!" instead. Quite possibly the most ironically stupid decision possible given that the Numenoreans of the end of the Second Age WERE colonialist racial supremacists. Though, some have speculated that Ar-Pharazoan the Golden will be full on "Drumpf" and King's Men all about "Make Numenor Great Again!". Never mind that after Tar-Aldarion married the lesser lived Erendis thousands of years beforehand it caused the Royal House to unofficially adopt a rule of "bloodline purity" by intermarrying only within the Royal House (Tolkien DID describe the Numenoreans as being sort of reminiscent of the ancient Egyptians).
Marrying non-Dunedain became a problem in Middle-earth too, when the royal line of Gondor interbred with and were culturally influenced by the Men of Rhovanion it led to an incredibly bloody civil war that Gondor never truly recovered from.

As has been said before. The writers/producers of this show do not care about accurate racial depictions. Every race, be they Child of Iluvatar, Halfling, or Dwarf is going to be a distractingly diverse blob where all colors of the rainbow are somehow present, like the Harfoot "Tribe" Sir Lenny described in that quote.

They are either seeing themselves as "correcting a mistake" which is the "lack of diversity" and "strong female characters", or they are trying to fill a sort of minority actor quota set by Amazon (sort of like what the BBC has).

Also friendly reminder that there will be a POC lesbian elf/human romantic pairing, lest you forget. I feel like we all forgot about that. I don't think they've brought it up in any of the interviews since.
 
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As has been said before. The writers/producers of this show do not care about accurate racial depictions. Every race, be they Child of Iluvatar, Halfling, or Dwarf is going to be a distractingly diverse blob where all colors of the rainbow are somehow present, like the "Tribe" Sir Lenny described in that quote.
It's going to be just like The Wheel of Time (which was itself an obvious test-run for this show) where every scene and crowd was perfectly split down the middle with browns. For every honkey, there was at least one nigger or bugman.

Still, it is nice to see that Amazon is clearly floundering behind the scenes for how to promote the show. After their 'Meet the fans' trailer was universally shat on because it was a bunch of diversity blob millennial talking about how they wanted to fuck Sauron, and loved girlboss Galadriel. All the promotional material they've prepared falls flat on its face and they can't even seem to work up the nerve to go for hate-marketing. Can't wait for this thing to fall flat on its fucking face.
 
Still, it is nice to see that Amazon is clearly floundering behind the scenes for how to promote the show. After their 'Meet the fans' trailer was universally shat on because it was a bunch of diversity blob millennial talking about how they wanted to fuck Sauron, and loved girlboss Galadriel. All the promotional material they've prepared falls flat on its face and they can't even seem to work up the nerve to go for hate-marketing. Can't wait for this thing to fall flat on its fucking face.
This whole "Sauron/Annatar is hot" thing is so pandering, and I'm betting that they're going to make him some sort of sparkly bisexual seducer or something. The Tumblr-esque part of the fandom really likes to ship Melkor and Sauron. A side effect of having a story where there is an all-male fellowship of men who grow to be inseparable friends (Legolas and Gimli) or show extreme love and faith for one another (Sam and Frodo), is that is attracts Fujoshis like flies to a carcass.

Should Annatar be physically attractive? Yes.
Was Galadriel ambitious and prideful much of her life, a flaw that the One Ring attempted to exploit when Frodo tried to offer it to her? Yes.

But this doesn't mean that Sauron should be some sort of sex symbol or that Galadriel should be some sort of veteran warrior. Galadriel is probably one of the most powerful elves in Middle-Earth when this story starts. She was almost certainly the most powerful elf at the time of LotR. She is incredibly wise, can see the future, can read minds (she even claims to be able to read the mind of Sauron) amongst other things like healing or enchanting. Her abilities seem to be mostly "Defensive" like her mentor Melian. The only indisputably canon fight she's been in I recall is when the White Council cleared out Dol Guldur, which was probably more of a magical battle of wills that a conventional one.
 
I just want these people to leave the stuff I like alone. All of this stuff looks CW generic fantasy. The appendices aren't all that fleshed out, but they have the core of a great story, that in the hands of competent people could be great. Instead we have a show, made by corporate whores, who are only there, because they were the first people to say yes.
 
Watched the trailer again. "The world was so young." Opens on a shot of ruins. WTF?

The first sunrise, has a shot of a sunrise over a giant city. Galadriel is told she has fought long enough. Yet isn't this the beginning of time? Galadriel and the other Elf have both seen a lot. Yet the trailer said this was the beginning of time. Yet now it is the end of all people's times? Now the past is dead? Now it could be the being of a new era?

Such non-sensical voice-over lines in the trailer.
 
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Here's a pitch for a lotr TV show that I would consider watching. Takes place after the events of LOTR, and its a smaller story. No world ending nonsense, maybe not even a big bad antagonist (in the sense of being a world ender or a dragon even would be too much) and just have it be straight up adventure. It could just follow a handful of characters on a little adventure throughout middle earth, we'd get to see the aftermath of sauron's defeat, maybe hear about how some old characters are doing. Something more focused on the journey than anything. It would check a lot of boxes for me, and would have the bonus of not really ruining canon as bad since it takes place in the future.
 
Here's a pitch for a lotr TV show that I would consider watching. Takes place after the events of LOTR, and its a smaller story. No world ending nonsense, maybe not even a big bad antagonist (in the sense of being a world ender or a dragon even would be too much) and just have it be straight up adventure. It could just follow a handful of characters on a little adventure throughout middle earth, we'd get to see the aftermath of sauron's defeat, maybe hear about how some old characters are doing. Something more focused on the journey than anything. It would check a lot of boxes for me, and would have the bonus of not really ruining canon as bad since it takes place in the future.
Honestly, the time period this show is trying to cover actually isn't bad to right a story about. There is a lot of blank space to write in during the 2nd age, while not as tightly packed and short as the 1st age. If they had tried to make a smaller-scale story instead of the entire story of the 2nd Age, it could work. Like, do a show focused on the lives of each of the Ringwraiths, or the Numenorean's colonization of Middle-Earth, or the love triangle between Galadriel, Celeborn, and Celebrimbor.
 
My sad expectation is that we will get people trying hard to defend/justify this show. I mean I even know people who defend the Brian Herbert/KJA Dune novels, so there is little hope (except that Tolkien fans tend to be smarter than Dune fans, since Dune is kind of in this weird place of being both brilliant and dumb at the same time).

This is kind of a hijack, but you know what I don't understand at all?

People who highly rate the Peter Jackson movies.... but then for some reason rag on the earlier Ralph Bakshi film, or the Rankin-Bass ones.

I mean, they are far from perfect, but their transgressions feel like budget issues and stuff outside their control rather than deliberate attempts to usurp Tolkien (which is definitely the case with the Jackson films' worst excesses). Best of all, I can actually watch those and enjoy them. Above everything else, I find Jackson's films just boring and sleep-inducing.

No, actually the best part is that, for all their mistakes, the animated films actually feel like they've got the right idea, like they're on the same wavelength as Tolkien. Which makes sense.... by the late 1990s, film was basically incapable of ever understanding someone like Tolkien, whereas the 1970s wasn't far removed (and would probably have had a lot of people who experienced his work during the first wave).

Also, its just strange people complain about things like "Viking Boromir" but are totally fine with "there's an hour-long subplot where we fake Aragorn being dead, which is basically a filler arc in an already too-long movie."
 
Here's a pitch for a lotr TV show that I would consider watching. Takes place after the events of LOTR, and its a smaller story. No world ending nonsense, maybe not even a big bad antagonist (in the sense of being a world ender or a dragon even would be too much) and just have it be straight up adventure. It could just follow a handful of characters on a little adventure throughout middle earth, we'd get to see the aftermath of sauron's defeat, maybe hear about how some old characters are doing. Something more focused on the journey than anything. It would check a lot of boxes for me, and would have the bonus of not really ruining canon as bad since it takes place in the future.
Frankly the best attempt at a LOTR sequel (and game mod in general) I've ever seen is the Fourth Age: Total War mod for the first Rome: Total War (a game that's almost 20 years old), set a couple centuries after the events of the trilogy with a civil war between Aragorn's descendants and the lingering malign influence of the Mouth of Sauron forming its centerpiece. The devteam worked on that mod for almost 15 years (their demo came out in 2005, the final patch for the full mod in 2019) and, similar to how Amazon could only go on a few pages of the appendices for Rings of Power, they only had a few pages of Tolkien's concept for a sequel to work with. (Because Tolkien ended up deciding a story about the Reunited Kingdom degenerating and future Gondorian boys smashing up monuments like they're Antifa would be too depressing to write about) The creators ended up having to rely on both extensive lore research and conjecture, ie. making things up, to produce a viable game, and haven't moved on from Rome I as it became outdated even by the standards of the pre-Warscape engine Total War games.

And yet the end product is still one of the best fan-mods for any game I've ever played, to the point where it feels like an entirely new game in its own right. On top of that, the team is so wonderfully, autistically devoted to Tolkien that almost immediately after concluding work on FATW, they went right on to work on another LOTR mod (this time set in an actually canonical timeframe, the Wainrider invasion of the mid-Third Age where Gondor's getting beat down by a new wave of hostile Easterlings while Arnor is on its last legs). In addition to playthroughs of FATW and other old Total War mods, this guy on Youtube has made videos showcasing the new mod's icons and faction units, including some factions that haven't been properly previewed in the devs' main thread.

If Amazon had even one-hundredth of the talent, passion and attention to both Tolkien's lore and the themes he was trying to convey (such as the 'Long Defeat', or the idea that the world will inevitably gradually decline as time goes on in spite of occasional temporary reversals like the victory of the Free Peoples of Middle-earth over Sauron, until the apocalypse happens) of the people behind Fourth Age & Wainriders Total War, I don't think they'd have gotten even one-hundredth of the hate they're rightfully getting now.
 
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