Because we all know he refuses to spend any money on clothes, getting everything he wears out of free donated bins, here's a thought:
And 0 underwear
I can see no difference between this picture and a potato I have sitting in my pantry.
The potato in your pantry won't sexually harass your niece when you invite her for dinner, won't constantly demand a hookup and doesn't stink up the entire house
This coming from a guy who has publicly admitted to being a pedo multiple times, says creepy shit to underage girls including his own family members and who isn't allowed anywhere near his family
His eyes. One is always open more than the other.
Good GOD he’s so hideous. Okay also re all this news about Myrna — I think that if Pukas manages to outlive his mom, he is going to absolutely LOSE IT when she dies. He will of course learn for sure that she hasn’t left him anything, but I think deep down he actually does know that. His family doesn’t help him out now, I don’t think he TRULY believes that is going to change later on, dead or alive, it’s just a cope he tells himself and more so that he tells the world in hopes of fooling some money hungry woman into dating him.
), and talks about how he’s “basically a parent” because he’s changed his nieces/nephew’s diapers and fed them bottles before. However, he never talks about anything beyond the baby/small child phase, or about them now, and we know he doesn’t talk to them now. So it seems that it’s been a LONG time since he was a part of their lives.
I miss the hilarious old wern. His new shit is boring.
...what?
Queefy baes, dude. It's always queefy baes.
That meltdown, should it ever happen, will be fucking legendary. I would be surprised if it didn't turn out to be the crown jewel of Wernology.
He looks like the butch lesbian that worked at my high school supervising the kids.
Good GOD he’s so hideous. Okay also re all this news about Myrna — I think that if Pukas manages to outlive his mom, he is going to absolutely LOSE IT when she dies. He will of course learn for sure that she hasn’t left him anything, but I think deep down he actually does know that. His family doesn’t help him out now, I don’t think he TRULY believes that is going to change later on, dead or alive, it’s just a cope he tells himself and more so that he tells the world in hopes of fooling some money hungry woman into dating him.
But more importantly than that, I truly believe that somewhere inside the recesses of his rotting mind, Lucas knows full well that his mom is the LAST human being alive right now who gives a single fuck about him. His stepfather Larry does too to an extent, but that’s because it’s his wife’s first born child. Lucas knows that if Myrna isn’t around, Larry isn’t going to be doing him any favors or being in his life. He doesn’t do that NOW when Myrna is alive, aside from checking in to make sure Lucas hasn’t literally died once in a while. When Myrna goes, that’s it.
Lucas knows that his brothers hate him. His older brother Shawn is more open about this, and his younger brother Seth simply refuses to speak to him, for about a decade now. For about the same time frame, his father Roy has only spoken to him on rare occasions when Lucas has reached out, usually to give Roy random gifts for his birthday or Christmas as a way to attempt to show that he’s doing just fine, which doesn’t work. Roy has reacted to the gifts before (usually board games) by flat out telling Lucas he doesn’t play board games and likely will never play the game Lucas gave him. From what info we are able to glean, it seems like his stepmother Becky doesn’t talk to or interact with Lucas at all. Same with his step-sisters (Larry’s daughters). From what little information Lucas and Myrna have given up, it appears that Lucas behaved inappropriately around one of the step-sisters’ daughters. As we all know, Lucas often talks about his “two gorgeous nieces” (
That is all of his immediate family, and Myrna (and to an extent her husband) is/are the only ones who shows any kind of love for Lucas. He does not have any friends, the only true friends he had he burned bridges with a long time ago, even before we knew of him. The only woman who has ever cared about him has moved on so much that we’ve never heard from her regarding any of his shenanigans like we have with Myrna, Shawn, and Cyril. And I truly believe that Lucas KNOWS this. He KNOWS that if his mom dies or were to truly cut him off, that’s it. NO one cares about him.
Lucas with wealth would be a very productive cow. He would be insufferable but he might catch a gold digging zoomer bae and imagine that saga!
....After years of raving and shitting herself in the mortal world as a punishment for birthing a monster, myrna finally dies. 'At least its finally over' she muses to herself as she starts to notice the ever increasing heat and her vision clears, revealing she has awoken in hell, surprised to find she is in the body of the 15 year old version of herself. Lucifer takes a moment to welcome her to his domain and escorts her to the apartment she'll be living in for all eternity. 'By the way, your roommate just arrived' lucifer tells her, 'he should be arriving at the apartment momentarily' he continues, as the door swings open and lucas waddles into the swelteringly hot apartment, holding a soggy burrito and leering at his 15 year old mother. 'Finally! a smart, pretty, interesting teen girl that I can yeet with a burrito!' lucas thinks to himself as he lurches toward myrna, to her utter horror
You're sick. I like it
