- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
They decided it would be futile to shoot him because they don't have fat-penetrating bullets that can get through the fat.
Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter
- Thread starter Caverlock
- Start date
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2022
Actually, I believe the reason is more a matter of effort: while it would take little effort to shoot him, the problem lies in that, like a dead, beached whale, Fatrick would be a logistical nightmare to move and properly dispose of. Plus he'd bloat with gas and likely explode all over that shit neighborhood, covering everything for a mile in chunks of blubber, booze and greasy, half-digested Hooligans' slop.
- Joined
- Dec 24, 2018
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2020
They need a Hogwitzer.
None Drunk Username
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2020
I don't want to derail the thread too much and I'm probably late in asking this, but can someone that knows cars real well explain why Ford Mustang's suck? I've heard that claim before (and about Ford in general) and I'm just wondering why.
Either way the fact that he's so proud of his mustang is classic fatrick.
Either way the fact that he's so proud of his mustang is classic fatrick.
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2020
They don’t - they’re just nothing special and he acts like he’s somehow a hotshot for having one and/or has more knowledge about cars in general by having such a vehicle.
They’re pedestrian by every stretch. The very least he could do is get a Saleen/Roush/etc or a proper classic one. But he’s not actually successful enough to purchase one of those - and probably not a good enough driver to keep it on the road.
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2019
They used to be an American status symbol but the quality of the cars has degraded since the muscle car era. They're seen as pretty plebian cars to get obsessed about now, and overpriced for their niche. It's the kind of car a fresh boot buys with his first paycheck to wrap around a tree.
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2021
Ford has a reputation for reliability issues. Old Mustangs had soul but pat drives a generic shitbox that shares branding and little else with them. I wouldn't be surprised at all to find it is a V6.
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2019
I shared more about Pat with a friend who’s a successful author. He said he’s “literally never seen” books rank as low as Pat’s. Oh dear. First I sent him this classic Pat story.
Also: The 1995 Mustang was pretty popular with girls at my high school back in the day. (I’m a ‘90s grad.) Can’t say I ever saw a straight man drive one. Pat’s other dream car is probably a Miata.
Also: The 1995 Mustang was pretty popular with girls at my high school back in the day. (I’m a ‘90s grad.) Can’t say I ever saw a straight man drive one. Pat’s other dream car is probably a Miata.
- Joined
- May 30, 2021
Piggy has uploaded a new image of his sow:
Cactuar King
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2019
Step 1: Fix the fucking fence.
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2019
Oof. Big Niki really is depression personified. Does he post these deeply unflattering photos of her to humiliate her, or does he genuinely think she’s a trophy?
- Joined
- Jun 29, 2016
It's like watching a grown man playing in a ball pit all by himself.
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2019
Seeing his back fat like that is truly sickmaking. His torso looks like when dough bursts out of a split can of Pillsbury rolls.
Gotta say, none of my friends hang out on barstools as much as Pat does and I’m kind of disturbed by how much his life is centered on Twitter and his barstool at Hooligan’s. Pat clearly thinks it’s very sophisticated and writerly to drink the day away, every day. But it’s just pathetic. While everyone else is out there living, he’s drunk and fantasizing about a life he’ll never lead. It would be sad if he wasn’t such a repulsive creature.
Firstname Lastname
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2018
I wonder how many barstools have collapsed under Rick's immense weight
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2021
Good catch. I couldn't believe it was him at first since his back is unusually straight due to being in the process of drinking, rather than having the characteristic curvature of his patented Hunchback of Milwaukee pose, which it assumes naturally whenever Pat starts battling the atalkers on his phone. Upon closer inspection, seeing the multiple chins seamlessly melt with his neck into one shapeless mound upon which his overgrown yet empty head rests leaves little doubt it's indeed our prized pig.
On a side note, whoever is NiceNameStupid over at the other forums, you're doing God's work.
Maricón de Mierda
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2021
He's an unemployed depressed pre-diabetic alcoholic with undiagnosed personality disorders. He's in a loveless marriage with no children. He signed away the rights to his own biological child. He lives in a shitty neighborhood. He has no real friends left. He drove away some, including his previous wife, and the remainder (a suspicious amount) are incarcerated for sexual crimes related to children. He Tweets hundreds of times a day to people he hates. He owes $37,092.09 to the webmaster of a fan website for a defunct radio show. By any metric, his life is in shambles. Hence, he drinks beer by the bootful.
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2020
Crazy how ugly and fat he is in photographs. I really admire OnA and the Farms for their restraint in not photoshopping him like they/we do with other cows; his corpulence needs no artificial enhancement.
Fanny Trucker
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 24, 2021
Something about the beer boot picture gives me a strong CWC vibe, it evokes the classic piece with the giant red straw
- Joined
- May 7, 2021
I thought the Mr Mackey Rick head had me until I got to the boot lmao. Also does Niki wear anything but leggings and flip-flops? They must share a humiliation fetish. I shudder at how often they launder.